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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to wonder if anyone actually enjoys hosting play dates?

10 replies

PorkFlute · 28/02/2018 23:48

It can’t just be me that finds even nice kids who I like in small doses to be an absolute pita on play dates.
I’ve had kids over who’ve drawn on my walls (not toddlers), tried to sneak small toys home with them without asking as well as sometimes just being really rude and unpleasant to be around. There are a few kids who are a joy to host but in the main I find play dates an absolute chore. My kids are above the age where I feel I should need to put activities out for them. They have endless toys, a large garden and if their friends are allowed to play out the front they tend to do that for a while.
I would be absolutely mortified if my kids behaved the way some do when they come to our house. Although maybe they do and the parents just give the same non-commital ‘yeah they’ve been fine’ as I do when I go to collect? I really hope not though. The only time I actually said something to parents was when 3 of dds friends were round and were being so unpleasant to dd that when a neighbour called for her I let her go and play with them in their house so had to explain her absence when the other parents arrived.
I do tell other kids off if need be the same as I do my own but play dates still tend to be a couple of hours of relentless misbehaviour. Where am I going wrong? I guess I could just stick a film on but it would kind of defeat the object of having friends over to socialise.
Maybe I just don’t like other people’s kids?

OP posts:
ShiftyMcGifty · 28/02/2018 23:52

All the kids who have come over to ours have been absolutely lovely, we’ll-behaved, such a joy, never damaged a single toy/item and ate everything offered without a fuss... and I still breathe a sigh of relief when they leave and think thank fuck the play date is done

MrsZippyLake · 28/02/2018 23:57

I’ve got one on Friday that I’m already dreading. The one yesterday started going through my cupboards looking for more treats because apparently I was stingy on the pudding front.

ChickenMe · 01/03/2018 00:06

Yes because the mum is a dear friend and our two 3 year olds whilst they fight like cat and dog absolutely adore each other
But I'm thinking the play dates you mean is where just the kid comes round and not the mum? I guess I have all this to come and should savour the fact that the worst ours do is pour pasta over the floor and roll around naked on top of it

LivingInTheSeventies · 01/03/2018 00:08

I have 4 dcs and I’ve never hosted a play date and I’ve probably only dropped my dcs to a handful.

From about the age of 10 they have mates over, it’s lovely, I do nothing, they just do their thing (play Xbox/ipads/tv/eat) and leave! Is that a play date?

I do take them to birthday parties (which I don’t enjoy) and I host parties at venues so my involvement is minimal.

user1andonly · 01/03/2018 00:09

DS1 had one pal who came to play probably every other Saturday for a couple of years. They would have been 10-11ish and would just vanish into DS1's room or the garden and all I needed to was chuck food and drink at them occasionally and they were sorted for hours. Less effort than DS1 on his own. So he was welcome any time!

Most others I had to grin and bear - the ones that expected me to provide constant entertainment and followed me around the house were particularly tiresome. And don't get me started on the ones who didn't want to go home and would hide/refuse to put shoes on/plead for five more minutes while their parents stood around smiling indulgently (I would offer to drop them home if at all possible with my own dc warned in advance that any messing on their part would mean no one invited round for a fortnight or whatever!)

PorkFlute · 01/03/2018 00:11

Oh yeah the play dates where the parent is there to deal with their own kids behaviour I don’t have an issue with. Especially if the parent is a friend.
I actually don’t mind the ones where the kids behave either but they are rare ime!
Lol at the child rummaging through the cupboard for treats. Hope it wasn’t one of mine while I’m sat at home imagining them being ever so adorable and complimenting you on your cooking 😂

OP posts:
PorkFlute · 01/03/2018 00:14

And yes to birthday parties at venues! Did one at home. Never again!

OP posts:
BackforGood · 01/03/2018 00:16

I used to like it when one of my dc had a friend over to play - or even they each had a friend over. It meant they were no longer fighting amongst themselves as they had a mate there. Entertained themselves much better.

Zoflorabore · 01/03/2018 00:28

We had a play date on Tuesday with 2 friends who are sisters and neighbours.

Dd is 7. They were very quiet.

My bathroom and its contents were destroyed- one word- slime.

Never again.

Bloody kids...Grin

IpreferFrieda · 01/03/2018 00:30

Yabvvvu to use the term play dates unless you are not in the UK!! It’s hsving kids to Tea!

However they said you are right Wink

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