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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to expect teachers to help DS

42 replies

Champagneandthestars · 28/02/2018 17:07

Remember his frigging snow gear!? He's 4 and I walked him to school in snow boots on Tuesday morning. My mum picked him up and didn't bring his boots home - ok, I'll accept that one. Picked him up in a bloody blizzard today still no snow boots. I asked for them and the TA said they had to go to after school club - they'd look tomorrow. I get half way across the playground and his gloves are missing from his bag! We had to walk all the way home without them and he was FREEZING! Tempted to keep him off school tomorrow as have no gloves or boots for the walk to school Angry.

OP posts:
Sirzy · 28/02/2018 17:10

Yabu to expect them to be able to keep track of everything extra sent in yes.

PlanNumber · 28/02/2018 17:11

I don;t think the TA should have helped you look, presumably she had children to supervise elsewhere, but you & DS should have been allowed to go and get them.

I don't think school can be responsible for the gloves, as neither you nor TA knew they were missing until you were halfway across the playground.

I'm sure if you'd gone to the office someone would have taken you to the classroom to look, although you may have had to wait until there were no other parents waiting to be seen.

Enuffsenuffsenuff · 28/02/2018 17:13

They don't sound very organised. Surely when he takes his gloves and boots off they should go in or with his bag so they don't get lost or mixed up with everyone else's? I would expect them to keep all of his things together since he's only 4.

VladmirsPoutine · 28/02/2018 17:15

They sound all over the place tbh. I don't think yabu but you should really have a back up plan for this type of scenario as it's very likely with children and a school with many children and teachers or TAs with multiple responsibilities.

Ca55andraMortmain · 28/02/2018 17:17

I think yabu although I agree it's annoying.when I taught p1 I had 27 kids, all with various (usually unnamed) gloves, hats, scarves, socks and boots. We did have a system of putting all the wet things on the radiator and boots in the wet area etc and everyone was reminded to take home everything they came to school with, but really it was impossible for me to be responsible for keeping of everyone's stuff every day, especially when things weren't labelled and the kids often didn't recognise their own belongings. I'm sure the teacher and TA are doing their best but you should have checked for his stuff before you left and asked to go in yourself to look for it.

Feenie · 28/02/2018 17:19

Why don't you go and get his snow boots from after school club, and send him in to get his gloves - you can easily do that whilst you're in charge of your one child, fgs.

GreenTulips · 28/02/2018 17:22

I would expect them to keep all of his things together since he's only 4

LOL - he has a peg? You taught him to put his gloves in his pocket?

KurriKurri · 28/02/2018 17:24

Gloves always go walkabout - I recommend the kind on a string that thread through the sleeves - then they stay in the coat all the time. They should have let you get his boots though - and they ought to have somewhere kids can put their boots to dry after they've been outside.

DalekDalekDalek · 28/02/2018 17:24

Expecting them to keep track of 30 kids assorted accessories and footwear seems a bit much. But I do think the school should have let you go in and look for them. Did you ask whether you could look?

user187656748 · 28/02/2018 17:25

Why didn't you turn around if you were only half way across the playground Confused?? Instead you stomped home letting his hands and feet get cold. Weird.

user1483387154 · 28/02/2018 17:27

You are responsible for checking he has all his stuff before he leaves. It is not the TA's job

TeaforTiger · 28/02/2018 17:32

30 children X 30 sets of hats/gloves/scarves etc

It's not the TA's job, it's yours. To 1, check he has everything and 2, teach him to be responsible for his own things.

SEsofty · 28/02/2018 17:37

Agree. It's your job to check he has everything before you leave the playground and if he doesn't have it go back in and get it.

Looneytune253 · 28/02/2018 17:37

YOU need to make sure you’ve got everything. Why not ask the school for gives once you realised they were missing. Seriously it’s your and your sons responsibility NOT the teachers

PortiaCastis · 28/02/2018 17:40

It's your job to make sure he has all his things not the TAs

Ffsnothingworks · 28/02/2018 17:40

You should see the mound of boots in our Early Years area!

I was amazed the other day when putting out unnamed jumpers for parents to claim for their children at the end of school, only for them not to be picked up. We are slightly separate to the rest of the school, so they can only belong to the reception children.

My 11 yr old ds went out in odd gloves today because he randomly misplaces/loses them and I can only do so much.

Greyponcho · 28/02/2018 17:40

Maybe bring them home with you in the morning after he gets to school, assuming they’re not needed during the day?

cupcake007 · 28/02/2018 17:42

Speaking as a TA in a reception class I'd say yes you are BU. If I had a £ for every time a child had said they'd lost a hat, scarf, glove etc this week, I wouldn't need to go back to work tomorrow! It's impossible to keep track of 30 sets of outdoor clothing, especially when it's hardly ever named.

Fekko · 28/02/2018 17:45

How many kids? How many gloves, boots,socks,hats? I wouldnt expect the school to keep tabs. I’d try to train the child to our these on his bag/peg/bag and check them at pickup.

(Note; in theory this works perfectly, however in the real world it does not)

MaisyPops · 28/02/2018 17:47

YABU
TA had to go to after school club which is what they'll be paid for and where their supervison makes up the staff/child ratios. That's where they need to be.

She said she'd look tomorrow because she had to be at after school club. That's the best she could offer. It's not her job to be responsible for lots of pieces of clothing and footwear.

upsideup · 28/02/2018 17:49

I get half way across the playground and his gloves are missing from his bag! We had to walk all the way home without them and he was FREEZING!

No you didnt, you were half way across the playground you could of walking maybe 20 steps to go and get is gloves?
If your mum picked him up tuesday you should of asked her to make sure he brought his boots home.
When I pick my children up from school I check we have gloves, coat, scarf, waterbottle, lunch box, bag, pe kit or whatever they went in with.

Deshasafraisy · 28/02/2018 17:54

This is why we have spare

Springtrolls · 28/02/2018 17:57

You need to get used to this now.
Attach the gloves to the coat. Kids are constantly reminded to put their gloves in their pockets/bag/tray.

mommy2018 · 28/02/2018 18:06

Yabvu. Do u not have a spare of everything @ home?
My dd has 2 hats and 2 pairs of gloves (plus hundreds of odd 1s) and then has 2 pairs of 'snow boots' (I had to adapt myself as she can't where shop shoes) 1 pair of boots stay at school and 1 she wears on drop off and I take them back with me then she wears them home wen I pick her up (same with gloves & hat) that way there is no leaving behind or having to rush out for new gloves/hat wen they get lost. If u don't want to be carting a spare pair of boots around then put his normal shoes on him & take a second pair of dry socks.

LockedOutOfMN · 28/02/2018 18:11

Yabvu. It's your responsibility to make sure he has everything before you leave, to name his stuff to reduce the chance of it being lost, and to encourage him not to lose things e.g. putting them in his bag or coat pocket or on or under his peg.

You do know teachers have 30 kids in the class and TAs often more?