To hate the term 'brat'?

[upsideup]

I'm all for calling a naughty child, a naughty child and I'm not exusing bad behaviour at all, But I just think of brat as just being the child equivelent to the word 'bitch' really and have only ever experianced it being used towards girls and not paticularly naughty ones. I also think its sometimes used with a hint of nastiness and dislike towards the child rather than just calling a naughty child a naughty child.

My eldest dd(10) has always been the most quiet, polite, wellbehaved little girl but yet shes has still been called a brat quite a few times, never in situations when she is actually behaving naughty . However my DS(8) actually going by the definition is a bit of a 'brat' hes a loud, he doesnt listen and if he does listen and hears the rule he will purposely do the opposite (not all the time) but no one has ever refered to him as a brat, he gets called a 'cheeky monkey' or his behaviour is put down to 'boys being boys'. I also have a little boy and girl who are 11 months apart and will be in the same school year, in reality they are both little brats but I can already predict that DD will get it a lot more than DS. Also for my DSD who is now 22 the brats she used to get as a child have quickly turned into 'bitch'

AIBU?
Does anyone actually think the word is applied equally and fairly to just naughty children (both boys and girls)?

Do your children behave?

Its applied equally around here but doesnt refer to a naughty child its usually a 'spoilt brat' referring to their very entitled behaviour. Naughty is just children doing what all children do. Being a brat is usually a result of their upbringing.

I agree that it is used more for girls, but not dramatically more.

You seem to have heard the word a lot. It's not a word that I hear a lot. When people are calling a child a brat, it'll usually be said behind closed doors.

For me, brat is obviously not a complementary word. It's used for a spoilt, obnoxious child. I hope you've defended your DD when this word has been flung at her.

YABU and over thinking. Don't think brat is aimed at either sex if any thing its more of an insult for boys.

Obviously its not a nice word to use about anyone. But I reserve the right to use it (if only in my head or to DH) when children are being particularly vile. Lifes not all sunshine and roses when you are a parent surely adults are "allowed" to say words that aren't "nice" sometimes .

The Cambridge dictionary definition is

a child, especially one who behaves badly

That is correct.

To call a woman a bitch is quite different. You're calling them a female dog.

fortywinksfortyblinks

Do your children behave?

I explained in my OP.
DD(10) does yes all the time, but still has been called a brat.
DS(8) half of the time but can never remember him being called a brat.
DD(3) and DS(4) Sometimes but for now a lot of their behavioir is just them being little.

Brat suits the behaviour of some children admirably.

It is not asking to the word “bitch”.

It is not akin to the word “bitch”.

My ex had a 21 year old daughter who I would definitely call a brat! She was awful and very "bratty" so it's not just children who can display bratty behaviour.

Who called your DD1 a brat? Strange thing to do if she's so well behaved.

In what context has your older dd been called a brat if her behaviour is good? And who has called her it?

I agree with you, op. It sounds very aggressive and I would think less of a person applying the term to a child.

My elder DD has been called brat usually in situations when she is actually being well behaved or polite and other children are not, she gets called the 'brat' or behaviour is 'bratty'

My mum’s insult of choice for her kids was ‘spoilt brats’, which I find amusing in hindsight seeing as it was almost exclusively a comment on her own parenting.

And no, we weren’t spoilt, by any stretch of the imagination. If bloody only.

So YANBU OP, I hate the word too!

i read that a particular hospital had an obs and gynae department affectionately known by the staff as 'brats and twats'

Just thought i'd throw that in

But what specifically is she doing? And who is calling her a brat. It’s unusual for people to throw the insult out in front of the child and parent

I can't think of any situation where a well behaved and polite child is called a brat.

Who said it? And what did you say to them?

Who are all these people calling your DC brats?

Not a word I'd use, but I don't associate it with one sex more than the other. I wouldn't compare it to the word 'bitch' - I hear it as more dismissive than aggressive.

Depends on the context - I was a 'squaddie brat' and used like that it was almost never a perjorative term but more like a badge of honour.

Neither of mine have ever been called a brat by anyone

You can display brattish behaviour as an adult (example my university friend throwing a hissy fit because her parents bought her a car and she didn't like the colour). Verruca Salt personifies a brat. Its behaviour like ripping the wrapping of a present and not saying thank you.

I only hear it on here. And it's grown women who refer to themselves as it,,as in "am I being a brat".

I dislike it because it minimises the behaviour. It's not the done thing to say no honey you're being a total bitch/c**t or whatever. So I say nothing.

But not once have I read a thread where someone has said am I being a brat or ok I'm a brat and agreed. I've always thought what they are being is much worse and that by calling themselves brats they are trying to minimise and cutsie up unacceptable/appaling behaviour.

I've never heard a child referred to it in recent years.

The term is perfectly apt to some children. It is nothing like 'bitch'.

Erm

There's no way your child's behaviour is that fantastic if she has openly been called a brat on several occasions. She must be really bratty.