To expect them to leave the blardy dog at home ?

[frazzledazzle]

I'm expecting dc3 in a few weeks and the ILS will probably visit which I don't have a problem with but whenever they visit they always have to bring the dog!

The dog is very boisterous and is always licking my sons (3.5 and 1.5)and I don't want dog hairs everywhere.

Their house is really small so when DC3 is born it's going to have to be them that visits us from then on as it's a squeeze to fit us all in their house now.

So AIBU to ask them to leave the mutt at home (MIL will prob not be happy as the dog is her be all and end all really )or am I being precious?

you are not being unreasonable. their grand kids should be their first priority. i love dogs but fgs... some people treat them like kids!

I think its fine to expect people to not bring a dog, even if it is your mil, if i wanted a dog in my house i would have one, as i don't I don't want anybody elses either.

I would always ask if it was ok to bring my dog unless I sensed it was not then wouldn't ask. I always tell people that we can make alternative arrangement with no problem

We have a rottweiller and obviously she is quite large. As my husband is in the forces I am frequently on my own and so lots of people invite me to stay. I ALWAYS make a real point of saying 'well I've got the dog and she takes up a lot of room, and whilst I will turd patrol your garden she will expect to be able to pooh on your roses, and if she goes for a walk she will get the mud from her paws into every nook and cranny of your house and I do not mind if you would like me to leave her at home'. Usually people stutter and then say 'well perhaps not the dog...!'. If it can be arranged I will put the dog in 'puppycare' usually someone coming to the house. But I will not put her in and out of kennels so if I cannot get puppycare I do not go. BUT I do not feel resentful, however sometimes the other side do. I guess what I am saying is that it is perfectly reasonable to ask them to leave the dog at home (especially with a new baby) but it is equally reasonable of them to cut the number of visits down so that their 'baby' does not go into kennels. What would not be reasonable is if they take the attitude no dog no us. These are their grandchildren and they DO and SHOULD rate higher than any furry beast - however loved.

Have they got anyone to look after the dog while they are away?

Could you have some rules about which rooms it is allowed in?

I would never expect anyone to bring their dog in to my house. I wouldn't want this and would not agree to it, unless under very special circumstances. But even then reluctantly.

If coming to stay your ILs should look to have their dog looked after elsewhere.

This drives me mad. My dad has a giant huge monster of a dog, it's a Briard, and although friendly, it just flattens everything and everybody in its path. He brought it to my dds 3rd birthday and there were 15 terrified screaming toddlers as it romped around destroying things, chewing new toys and bowling down children. After that i insisted that it doesn't come to visit again. It dug up our herb garden too. Bad bad dog.

I have plenty of friends who actually ASK me to bring the dog as their dcs love playing with her!

I never assume that the mutts are invited and rarely ask if we can bring the buggers - unless it's to another doggy house

And I've never had a problem with that or arranging suitable dog care either !

Oooh, no. I don't blame you.

My PIL also have a dog, a nice dog but it's very hairy and licky and it hates cats. We've got three and he stresses them out. I don't want pet fur in our house as some of our other relatives are allergic (cats live in kitchen and back study only). We've said no to the dog every time they come and it causes offence to them. Why it's so hard to respect the wishes of other people in their own homes, I've no idea.

The dog won't melt if it has to go into a kennel for a couple of days.

No not unreasonable, I wouldnt like it at all even though we have a dog, but our dog doesnt come in the house. We do take him everywhere (walking) but not to other people's homes especially if they have babies.

My ILS only live 3omins walk away so would only be visiting a couple of hours at a time but I don't want a giddy dog running around licking everyone and leaving it's hairs everywhere.

they take this dog everywhere,even to the supermarket MIL waits outside and sits the dog on a carrier bag while FIL does the shopping!

oh, they can definitely be asked to leave it at home!

we have a dog and I didn't want him around in the first few days when I brought dd2 home so I absolutely would not want someone elses dog here!
Completely reasonable to request that he is left behind on this occasion (or always).

''The dog won't melt if it has to go into a kennel for a couple of days.'' Well if the owners never leave it on its own then it probably will get very stressed at kennels and be ill as a result; this is NOT THE DOG'S FAULT.
I'm not saying the OP should let the dog visit - it is her home and she should tell PIL's not to bring it and they will have to make alternative arrangements.

I don't think you're being unreasonable - I have a similar problem with my SIL and her dog - we're all going on holiday in a couple of weeks time and shes kicking up a fuss because we're allowed to take our baby(DD) and shes not allowed to take hers!!!!! She also refers to the dog as my MILs other grandchild (not my MILS opinion!) Just explain and maybe try and help them to find a dog sitter until new baby is older?