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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think dds friend is either a bitch or just weird?

54 replies

Foreverandforeverandever · 27/02/2018 22:02

They are 14 and school was closed today so they decided to go sledging (group of 4)

Dd brought 2 sledges and another one brought one of those disc/circles sledges.

Dds friend then accused her in front of the other 2 of having 3 sledges and purposely not bringing them all. Dd explained that she definitely only had 2 and friend refused to believe her.

I have two children Hmm so why would I have bought 3 sledges? They are also kept in a garage which I’m pretty certain her friend has never stepped foot inside of.

OP posts:
Rudi44 · 27/02/2018 22:34

Wow, OP didn't take long to flounce off!
Not nice to call children bitches.
14 year olds can be difficult but I am sure they will have long forgotten about it whilst you are still stewing about it

doesthislookoddtoyou · 27/02/2018 22:34

This reply has been deleted

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frasier · 27/02/2018 22:44

There were 4 of them and 3 sledges.

14 is still an age where wishful thinking happens, as does temper. Sounds like the child was annoyed that there was a sledge short and took it out on the girl who was lucky enough to have 2 sledges. (Was the accuser the one that didn't bring a sledge...?)

Some people never grow out of this! I have a cousin and a MIL who still both act like this when they are grumpy and feel badly done too lol!

Explain to DD that the girl was jealous and angry and made things up. Good learning experience.

frasier · 27/02/2018 22:45

*badly done TO

StickThatInYourPipe · 27/02/2018 22:50

Why didn’t the one who did bring the third sledge not say ‘actually it’s mine, I came with it?’ Instead of Just listen to your dd being called a liar?

That’s the one I would be looking out for tbh!

Dancingmonkey87 · 27/02/2018 22:50

applesareredandgreen

I think it is wierd that you are bothered enough to post about this on the internet!! Leave the teenage arguments to the teenagers ..... This ^

Tartyflette · 27/02/2018 22:51

I am happy to see that so few people on here seem to know any 14-year old bitches. I certainly did at that age and was most definitely one myself too. Meh - par for the course. Leave them to it, OP.

MammaTJ · 27/02/2018 22:52

I get that this has upset you and why!

Not on to call her a bitch though.

Anyway, back to your OP, this was either a mistake, or she really is not very nice. Up to your DD to work out and either stay friends or not..

Enuffsenuffsenuff · 27/02/2018 22:59

Sounds like teenage hormones / face saving. Bit much to call her a bitch since she's only 14 and you've only had one side of the story from your DD. It will have blown over by tomorrow.

doesthislookoddtoyou · 27/02/2018 22:59

I am happy to see that so few people on here seem to know any 14-year old bitches. I certainly did at that age and was most definitely one myself too

14 year olds can call each other bitches. Grown women calling their kids friends bitches are total thundercunts.

TrickyD · 27/02/2018 23:01

I have two children so why would I have bought 3 sledges?

We have no children, only two grandchildren and we have six assorted sledges in the cellar.

No snow though. 😢

missiondecision · 27/02/2018 23:04

Tricky ...how can you have no children but 2 grandchildren ?

rascallyrascal · 27/02/2018 23:04

Doesthislookoktoyou this is the second time tonight I have seen you on a thread being deliberately provocative. Are you ok? You seem very angry.

crunchymint · 27/02/2018 23:05

persepecacia is right, and as an adult OP you should know better

rascallyrascal · 27/02/2018 23:05

Sorry, doesthislookoddtoyou

gingergenius · 27/02/2018 23:13

OP never referred to anyone as a bitch. At least not when I've looked on my app on my phone.

MaisyPops · 27/02/2018 23:17

It does sound bitchy and pointless, but that's some teenage girls for you.

I have to admit, to have that response to them not having a sledge for friend is one of the more bizarre 14 year old girl fall outs I've heard of late.

A bit weird for her, especially to create such a big deal. Bitchy behaviour, yes. But i don't think you can say she is a bitch.

newmama2018 · 27/02/2018 23:20

I have the absolute pleasure of spending them time with 14yr olds and I'm not being sarcastic I actually love it.

However 14 is a very complicated time of life because some of them suffer a temporary phase of "I'm always right and I'll take you all down if you think otherwise" tantrums. I think this is a case of it here. Teenagers don't always filter what comes out of their brain when just out with their friends (and sometimes not at all) so once something has been said, such as here, they can't take it back and have to defend it. There's also a lot of insecurity at this age despite the bravado. So if your DD friend saw a group of four but only three sledges she knows someone is going to be left out and to avoid that being HER she has put the "bad guy" tar brush onto your DD so they think less of her. It's political and a constant power struggle.

She wasn't being weird, wasn't being a bitch, your DD isn't being over sensitive and it'll all just blow over. They're going to wake up one day soon and have grown up overnight. These petty little quarrels will be insignificant and melt just as the snow that started it.

Keep defending your daughter but don't get involved because as quick as they will squabble with each other... they'll all turn on you twice as quick. Breathe in and smile. It'll be over soon and they'll deny it ever happened anyway!

Hygge · 27/02/2018 23:31

With just four replies and in only eleven minutes, the OP has managed to imply that everyone else's children will grow up to be awful and flounced from her own thread.

Is that not a record for how quickly a thread has escalated into madness?

newmama2018 · 27/02/2018 23:34

To clarify it's a problem like this:

Teenage girl 1(TG1)- your DD- brings two sledges
TG2- friend - brings nothing
TG3- brings sledding device
TG4- brings nothing

So it's guaranteed that TG1 and 3 will have fun in the snow. But this leaves 2 and 4 with one sledge so someone misses out. The first of these girls to kick up a fuss properly wins. The outcomes of her saying "you have three and didn't bring one" does a number of things:
A) takes the attention off her because she brought nothing at all and shouldn't really be complaining.
B) potentially means that she gets the spare out of guilt
C) makes TG1 the outsider for being "soooo unfair" and the others will join poor TG2 and let her use the other sledding device
D) establishes her position of group leader

So it's unfair. As TG1 was actually the only one not being selfish (by bringing a spare) but is now seen as being the mean one because she made an awkward situation.

I was once in a group like that. One set fire to my hair though and I called her a bitch to her face before running home to my mum in tears. I was 12 and it was the end of the world 😆 I have no regrets!

VladmirsPoutine · 27/02/2018 23:40

You, presumably a grown woman, is calling a 14yr old girl a 'bitch' over a bit of here/there regarding sledge? Righto.

Dynamitewithalaserbeam · 28/02/2018 00:00

I just love it when op's flounce Grin

TrickyD · 28/02/2018 07:32

Missiondecision, I once referred to my adult DSs as "the boys" on here and got some very nasty comments, so I am wary of calling them 'children' .
Reading your post reminded me that in fact we have 4 DGCs not 2, but the big and tiny ones are not of sledging age.

Peanutbuttercups21 · 28/02/2018 07:38

Lucky your daughter does not have your temper Smile

DearMrDilkington · 28/02/2018 07:40

Wow some of your ones are going to grow up to be right horrible monsters.

Don't look under your bed! Shock

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