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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To put DS in nursery even though I'm off work

20 replies

mommathatwearspink · 26/02/2018 19:11

I work three days a week and DD (3) and DS (10 months) attend nursery two days a week and PIL one day. I get two days off with them both which is lovely but I'm really struggling to spend any quality time with DD who will go to school in September. DS hasn't been easy from the start and now he's on the move, he's into everything. He also doesn't nap for more than 10 minutes at a time. I seem to be spending my days off seeing to him and I'm struggling to give much time to DD who is starting to feel it a bit. We've decided this evening that it would be beneficial for DD if we put DS in nursery for one afternoon whilst I'm off so that I can spend some real quality time with DD before she starts school in September but I feel like I'm abandoning him at nursery when I'm off work and should be spending time with him too.

OP posts:
mogloveseggs · 26/02/2018 19:13

I think it’s a great idea that will benefit you all.

Chottie · 26/02/2018 19:13

Don't feel guilty, you just need to do what works for you and your family. Flowers ignore anyone who makes snide comments..

Iamclearlyamug · 26/02/2018 19:13

I think that sounds fine - after all once DD starts school your DS will have all your time on your days off

Cauliflowersqueeze · 26/02/2018 19:14

Excellent idea. He’ll get full one on one time with his older sister in school in due course.

PotatoesOfTheCarribean · 26/02/2018 19:15

YANBU at all, it's really great to have time with your eldest before school,

I still do this sometimes, leave my youngest at nursery when it's the school holidays so I can have days with my eldest. I think they can really miss out otherwise, and it's only one afternoon a week. You could have little adventures with your DD and I think it's a great idea.

Idontdowindows · 26/02/2018 19:15

Don't feel guilty! It'll be good for all of you.

lightcola · 26/02/2018 19:15

Do it. I would. My oldest is also starting school in September and I want to spend as much time with him as possible too. Unfortunately we’re not in the position to do similar though with his younger sibling.

Cauliflowersqueeze · 26/02/2018 19:16

My friend used to put hers in nursery for the morning while she had a massage and a cup of tea in peace sometimes. She’s a brilliant mum and I think part of that is due to her spending a bit of time on herself now and again.

GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat · 26/02/2018 19:18

Another benefit would be to crack the poor napping. 10 mins only will mean he’s chronically overtired and that won’t be helping how difficult he is.

Don’t feel guilty and enjoy time with your dd.

mumof2exhausted · 26/02/2018 19:27

I have two afternoons a week with my 4 year old (he starts school in sept) and his younger brother is in nursery. It's brilliant, we do lots of stuff I can't do with younger one in tow. If you can afford it do it, you don't get this time back! Once older one is in school you'll have lots on one 2 one time with younger one!

Blondielongie · 26/02/2018 19:31

That sounds like a good idea. When dd goes to nursery, you will have plenty of 1-1 time with ds so don't feel bad about it. Started typing this ages ago but got distracted!

steamcomingoutofmyears22 · 26/02/2018 19:32

I think that's a great idea, it'll be lovely for her to have some undivided mummy time.

MummySparkle · 26/02/2018 19:32

Yanbu at all - I did it

MoodyTwo · 26/02/2018 19:37

I put DS in nursery for a day while I book a holiday from work and sleep, he is a year old and still doesn't sleep through the night 😞

TruJay · 26/02/2018 19:39

Absolutely do it, you and dd will love it.
I miss getting 1 on 1 time with ds since having dd

Original poster
mommathatwearspink · 26/02/2018 19:43

Thank you, you've all made me feel less guilty about our decision!
Georgie he has never napped really. I'm not sure what we can do about it?

OP posts:
caffeinequick · 26/02/2018 19:48

Great idea, your eldest will love it and you'll have lots more time one on one with your ds when your eldest starts full time anyway.

littleducks · 26/02/2018 19:51

Mine are all older but I sometimes send my youngest to nursery in school holidays and take my older ones to the theatre/museum so they can enjoy it properly without me being distracted preschooler wrestling.

happygirly1 · 26/02/2018 19:58

Firstly, I think it's a lovely idea to give your DD a bit of special time before she starts school. Certainly nothing to feel guilty about!

Regarding the sleeping, my DD would never sleep longer than 20 mins at a time in the day but would sleep quite well at night. No idea why, she just didn't! However, she hit a certain age, I think maybe around eight months, and just started napping for two hours a day, completely of her own accord! My point is, not to worry too much about the not napping. Keeping trying to encourage naps, but he'll nap longer if he needs to. Also, I don't know if this helps, but she has never napped in her cot during the day - she associates this with night time. As soon as I got her a comfortable buggy that she adored, she started sleeping in that so maybe try changing up sleeping arrangement options and see if it helps Smile

Original poster
mommathatwearspink · 26/02/2018 21:38

thanks happy that's really good to know. Like your DD, DS has no problem sleeping in his cot at night but will not nap in it during the day. May have to look into other options.

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