Ways to be closer when you're a parent

[Avaricii]

So with 3 under 5 I've started to wonder if DH and I are really a couple any more. Or if we're just parents. I know this isn't an unusual thing- but I wanted to know what things you do that help you remember why you got together in the first place. It feels like we just talk about the kids. Or the house. Or sometimes about work. I always ask about his day but its the same as any other day. I'm sure before kids we talked about other things. I just can't remember what they were...
Someone suggested mindfulness exercises to do together but I'm not sure where the hell to get some or start with those! Or if I could convince DH to do it. I did manage to get him to spend an evening answering the 36 questions that are meant to make you fall in love. But honestly towards the end I was getting bored. I mean, we've been together forever. I know all the answers he was going to give.
I want to be excited by us but its hard to find.
So- any ideas? Things to do in the evening when the kids are in bed instead of slumped on the sofa watching TV?

We eat at the table together every night after the dc have gone to bed. On a weekend night we might have a bottle of wine . We take lots of long walks too (with the dc there obviously! ). It's hard when you have little ones and very few babysitting options.

Thanks Battle. I feel so sad that we seem to be losing that connection that we had as a couple.

I think eating together is probably the right idea. TV (and probably evening mumsnet sessions) aren't helping.

I really empathise – as I feel this is us at the moment!
However, I really believe that it's an 'age and stage' thing. I was listening to a podcast on this subject and one of the experts was saying that it's OK to say 'I love you – but I'm knackered – can you wait for me for a couple of years'? I think that unless one partner seriously feels they're not getting enough attention don't go nuts trying to organise (stressful, pressurised) date nights. I think saying 'thank you' and trying to be kind goes a really long way...

Thanks
I worry that we've done the waiting - and saying I Love You while having kids but in the meantime we've lost the ability to be close just the two of us. I don't really know what I want I guess, as as parents we work quite well together. There's just something that we've lost along the way that I don't know how to get back. I feel at the "You can stop waiting now" point but when we look around we're not where we used to be.

Hang in there since my youngest turned 5 I literally feel like me and dh have 'fell in love again' as corny as it sounds. The pre school years I felt similar to you and I do think there's probably a biological / contraceptive reason for not feeling as close to your partner then especially if you're not planning any more children but as the kids get older and more independent you will get more time together
We used to go away for a night two times a year when ours were younger which really helped