Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Stupid school rule?

571 replies

upsideup · 24/02/2018 15:12

DC's school recently introuduced an hour of silent reading per week, dd absolutely loved this (DS doesn't but it has encouraged him to read more). Untill now they have been taking in a book from home, DD10 who spends hours reading for pleasure anyway takes in the book shes reading at home. I dont choose her books and I am also not strict about what she reads, was already aware that some of the books she enjoys were targeted at an age range slightly above hers.
We have had a letter home saying that dd's book this week was rated as 14+ so is not suitable to be read at school and I should send her in with a book suitable for her age so under 10's as teachers are not going to be closely monitoring what books the children are reading. That is ridiculous right?
She had not told us this all week as shes worried shes in trouble with the teacher but her book was taken off her and she was given a random book from the libary by the teacher which is not the sort of thing she likes and was too 'babyish' for her so she spent the whole lesson doing nothing.
To be clear the books she is reading are young teen fiction books, not gory or sexual true crime books, theres maybe mentions of kissing or mild swearing but nothing harmful or frightening for a 10 year old to hear, mine atleast and as its silent reading and not being read aloud surely its nobodies business what shes reading and it should be mine and her dads decision if its suitable or not for her, not the teachers?
We are going stuggle to find a book aimed at under 10s that she enjoys and I also have know idea how to find out what age rating a book has and surely its just a reccomendation to what age group may enjoy the book not a strict rule?
I can see the benefit of quietly reading at school and definately not one of the many parents who complained when the silent reading was introduced but what benefit is forcing her to read a book that she dosnt enjoy and is below her level? Shouldnt she be encouraged to challenge herself and have an enjoyment for reading not punished?

Do your schools do the same? AIBU to want to challenge this stupid rule?

OP posts:
Original poster
upsideup · 24/02/2018 19:41

Don't "Neighbours", "East Enders", etc; soap operas on well before the watershed cover substance abuse, sex, murder, etc?

Yes and plenty of books aimed at small children also cover those topics, my 10 year is comfortable with those topics to a degree and I would hope most 10 years olds would be aware and able to discuss or hear about these topics partly.
She dosnt need to read graphic desciptions but small gentle dicussions on real life issues and topics are not harmful. In the book shes reading there is small mention of a couple cuddeling in bed together, someone being addicted to opium and a shooting with no death none of theese are outisde mt 10 year olds understanding or comfort.

OP posts:
ladyme · 24/02/2018 19:46

Sometimes you have to say to your kids "there are always going to be some rules you don't agree with that are made for the good of everyone" don't you?

I really don't think putting a different sleeve on a book is teaching her anything other than if you don't like a rule find a way round it - which could bite you on the arse in a few years when she doesn't like your rules.

My daughter is 11 and reads YA stuff as well but I'd have no problem if her school introduced something like this. I'd ask her teacher if they had any recommendations for her reading level that would be suitable and take it from there.

She's been reading some of the classics lately and enjoying them so why not try some of those suggestions rather than picking a fight?

halulat · 24/02/2018 19:49

I'd be delighted that she lives reading. Both mine read ' older' books in Y5 and 6. Things like Twilght, Hunger Games etc. Was never a problem in school as they were also happy to have children who wanted to read. Presumably if your child has the maturity to be reading this, she isn't going to be sharing anything others may giggle at or be shocked by.

BlueMirror · 24/02/2018 19:50

It's not just the topics it's how they are covered. There are some pretty grisly things in Disney for eg but the detail isn't the same.
One hour a week of reading a book that isn't your chosen genre isn't going to put you off reading for life if you enjoy reading at other times. In fact it would be good for her imo to broaden the types of books she is reading since it seems she can only possibly read teen literature.
Her teacher may well be quite happy with her reading a classic book that is aimed at a slightly higher age range since they will probably be familiar with the text and more able to make a judgement on about appropriateness.

FleurDeLizzie · 24/02/2018 19:53

It's only an hour a week
She can read whatever she likes at home. If some of the language in the classics is dated and difficult for today's children to understand - then it's god use of that hour a week. We can't all do what we want, when we want, and how we want. That's a good lesson to learn.

FleurDeLizzie · 24/02/2018 19:55

Good use. Not god use. God doesn't come into it.

RockinHippy · 24/02/2018 19:55

She's been reading some of the classics lately and enjoying them so why not try some of those suggestions rather than picking a fight?

Because sometimes "picking a fight" is actually the best thing for your DC. As above, my once book monster older DD barely reads anymore as daft rules like these & forced to read books she had no interest in has put her off reading. It stopped being a pleasure & became a chore. I didn't pick the fight in DDs say so as she didn't want any fuss, but with hindsight, I really wish I had.

Hippadippadation · 24/02/2018 20:01

The Arthur Ransome books might be a good bet? Swallows & Amazons et al?

FleurDeLizzie · 24/02/2018 20:10

I actually find it a good discipline to attempt to read a wide variety of books outside my interest zone. Now and again, of course, as a personal challenge. in precis, I don't believe for one minute that an acceptable book can't be found for an advanced 10 year old that isn't teen fiction.

iamyourequal · 24/02/2018 20:13

I’m all for children who love reading hoovering up as many books as they can. However if a book has 14plus marked on it, it is surely not for nothing. I could imagine it being acceptable if the child was 13 or 12 and mature for their age. However 10-14 seems a tremendous jump to me. I wouldn’t allow it any more than I would allow an 11 year old to watch a 15 rated movie. They are still so young!

user1498927651 · 24/02/2018 20:13

It isn't going to be just one acceptable book though. Likely 20 of them. If it is only an hour a week, any book my DS enjoyed he would have been finishing at home, not keeping for the following week.

BlueMirror · 24/02/2018 20:26

Are you actually going to argue with the school that it's going to be bad for your dd to not be allowed to read teen fiction for 1 hr a week!
Do you know why your dd is only interested in themes aimed at a fair bit older? Does she have older friends?
I don't even agree that reading above her maturity is particularly good for her. Unless she's had life experiences that she shouldn't a lot will go over her head which won't help her comprehension.

ladyme · 24/02/2018 20:27

Sorry rockinhippy but I don't agree. Unless I have missed that the school are saying that she can't read what she likes out of school, I just can't see that an hour a week would put a child off just because the theme of the book is more child like. I agree that reading a range of genres is a good discipline and if this child shows a flair for reading she's going to need to read plenty of books that don't immediately grab her attention if she wants to do well in English in the future. Reading a range of literature (which is why I suggested the classics) will also enhance her writing style.

What you seem to be suggesting is akin to saying kids will stop liking sweets because a school has a healthy eating policy.

BlueMirror · 24/02/2018 20:27

My dd could pick up and read my books off the shelf from a young age for eg as her deciding skills were good. Wouldn't have had a clue what half of it meant though.

BlueMirror · 24/02/2018 20:27

*decoding skills

FleurDeLizzie · 24/02/2018 20:29

If a child is an avid reader, being asked to read something less interesting than their own personal choice is not going to put them off reading forever.It might be a chore, but it won't put them off. If your child is not a natural reader then the age appropriate limitation might trigger them into realising that reading can be enjoyable. Fun, even. Any kid can read whatever the hell they like, at home. Why not just accept school rules. They are there to protect every kid. Not just yours.

Tomorrowillbeachicken · 24/02/2018 20:31

Can she go non fiction? Read a book aimed at a general market on a subject she enjoys?

RockinHippy · 24/02/2018 20:31

It might be a chore, but it won't put them off

Sorry, but it very much did put my DD off reading for pleasure

Arborea · 24/02/2018 20:34

I assume she's already read the Series of Unfortunate Events books by Lemony Snicket? There's a follow-up series, but I don't know what it's called.

I also enjoyed the Three Investigators books at about that age (plus tons of Agatha Christie, which then led to Margery Allingham, Dorothy Sayers etc. Miss Pym Disposes is also fairly tame, but a decent book. Likewise the Daughter of Time).

If it were my child I would probably be encouraging them to find something that ticks the boxes for both them and school. I'd be really keen on them developing an appreciation for different types of literature. There's so much joy to be had from things like PG Wodehouse and Douglas Adams, even Bill Bryson. Although the censorship is irksome, I can understand why they mightn't be keen on saucy books doing the rounds for fear of getting flak from other parents. Nor can I blame them for not knowing that some Stephen King isn't as graphic as his others. There's just too much literature out there for teachers to be expected to be familiar with.

alpineibex · 24/02/2018 20:35

Surely a year later when she's in secondary school, she will have full access to YA and the 11y/o year 7s will be able to read any of those?

alpineibex · 24/02/2018 20:36

In secondary school library

MaisyPops · 24/02/2018 20:36

ladyme
You speak so much sense.

In my y7 group I've got them in reading triads and encouraged them to branch out and try something new for their reader. It's not putting them off reading because they are trying something different (and actually, branching out has been wonderful for most of them). Pax by sara pennypacker has been really well received by reluctant and talented readers alike.

If reading a different book once a week ruins reading for someone then they probably weren't a rounded avid reader to start with.

FleurDeLizzie · 24/02/2018 20:54

Maisypops. Entirely agree. To have a full, rounded view of literature, you can't cherry pick.

FleurDeLizzie · 24/02/2018 20:57

And just read the ones that appeal.

FleurDeLizzie · 24/02/2018 20:59

Although that's what I do now that I've read most of them. At 10 I probably hadn't

Swipe left for the next trending thread