Stupid school rule?

[upsideup]

DC's school recently introuduced an hour of silent reading per week, dd absolutely loved this (DS doesn't but it has encouraged him to read more). Untill now they have been taking in a book from home, DD10 who spends hours reading for pleasure anyway takes in the book shes reading at home. I dont choose her books and I am also not strict about what she reads, was already aware that some of the books she enjoys were targeted at an age range slightly above hers.
We have had a letter home saying that dd's book this week was rated as 14+ so is not suitable to be read at school and I should send her in with a book suitable for her age so under 10's as teachers are not going to be closely monitoring what books the children are reading. That is ridiculous right?
She had not told us this all week as shes worried shes in trouble with the teacher but her book was taken off her and she was given a random book from the libary by the teacher which is not the sort of thing she likes and was too 'babyish' for her so she spent the whole lesson doing nothing.
To be clear the books she is reading are young teen fiction books, not gory or sexual true crime books, theres maybe mentions of kissing or mild swearing but nothing harmful or frightening for a 10 year old to hear, mine atleast and as its silent reading and not being read aloud surely its nobodies business what shes reading and it should be mine and her dads decision if its suitable or not for her, not the teachers?
We are going stuggle to find a book aimed at under 10s that she enjoys and I also have know idea how to find out what age rating a book has and surely its just a reccomendation to what age group may enjoy the book not a strict rule?
I can see the benefit of quietly reading at school and definately not one of the many parents who complained when the silent reading was introduced but what benefit is forcing her to read a book that she dosnt enjoy and is below her level? Shouldnt she be encouraged to challenge herself and have an enjoyment for reading not punished?

Do your schools do the same? AIBU to want to challenge this stupid rule?

I think children should ruddy well read whatever they want within reason.

But not in school.

Would you be happy for your DD to watch a 12 rated DVD at school?

Yes most of them I would, excluding horror films there has never been a film rated 12 that I have told dd she can't watch but I understand lots of other 10/ 11 year olds and their parents wouldnt be comfortable with that so I wouldnt expect the school to do it.

so I wouldnt expect the school to do it.

Same with books. Others are influenced and it would be seen that school is condoning the reading of possibly unsuitable material.

My 9 yr old don was given an Alex Rider book from school and loves it. I have always read and was reading Atephen King aged 12, entirely up to the parents and child i think

blue dc are all different. Dd had an adult sense of wit at a young age. I didn't one day suggest Frankie Boyle as an alternative to cbcc's just kidding, but we gradually got there.

Bad language in media I've never shielded her from. She spent a fair amount of time on working farms when she was learning to talk, so the lesson of not repeating certain language was an early one. And tbf although I was careful to stick to radio edits when she was preschool age, a lot of my music taste contains bad language.

Horror, again I know what does and doesn't bother her.

Conversely, I put her off reading fire starter till she was y8, because I felt the idea a parent can't protect you from the bad guys would upset her in a way the supernatural doesn't. I was happy for her to watch South park, family guy, mock the week etc from about 7/8, but didn't feel the themes in something like eastenders or Hollyoaks were appropriate till secondary. I let her watch the hunger games before black beauty. She started reading and watching game of thrones age 13, but at 14 I'm still putting her off water ship down.

My 6 year old is a free reader and can only read the books deemed suitable to read from a select few in a box. He cannot progress to older years 'free reader' books.

However, he is allowed to come home with a library book with the reference to a page 3 model being a slag!! (David Walliams billionaire boy). He doesn't understand the reference thankfully but I don't understand why it's even in there!!

I think you need to go and speak to the teacher.

mrsdaz sometimes books get put back in the wrong place. I would point out that reference to the school so that they are aware.

Same with books. Others are influenced and it would be seen that school is condoning the reading of possibly unsuitable material

Not the same at all. If the class is watching a 12A film, what would a child be able to do if they found a scene frightening? There would be no way to remove themselves from the classroom without being seen by peers even if this was allowed. A child silently reading a book they have chosen themselves is completely different.

I work with Yr1 and 2. Your son is among very few of his age to be a free reader. I wouldn't let our children choose without guidance at that age.

user Obviously. However, children are heavily influenced by others, their peers in particular. I see it every day.They want to read what others are reading. The reading hour is a relatively small part of the child's overall reading, why not support the school for the good of all?

Sounds like she needs a fake book cover 😆

You might be happy with your DC having a small amount of alcohol at home, but you could not send it in with their packed lunch.

Regardless of what your child reads at home, you do not know what level her classmates are at, and letting her take in a young adult/teen book means that other pupils not at her level, may see it and may ask their parents for a copy, which some parents might not want their kids to read.

Also, your child is not a teen, so should not be reading books aimed at teens, unless in the privacy of your home and with your consent.

Although some school rules may seem stupid, there’s always a reason behind them. So on this occasion, you are being unreasonable, it’s a one hour lesson, suck it up, find a book in the right age range and use it to teach your child the importance of how and why rules have to encompass a wide range of people, not just one individual.

I read the complete works of Agatha Christie at age 8.

Not something I’d let my ten year old read now haha!

If the school are very insistent, then has she read Nina Bawden, Phillipa Pearce, Berlie Doherty, Rumer Godden, Nicholas Fisk, Penelope Lively? There are lots of authors out there I'm sure she won't have heard of, but who are deemed suitable and aren't too babyish.

Firstly, I'm super jealous of you right now, I love that your daughter is such an avid reader.... mine love books but only if I'm reading so far we've made it through The Hobbit, The Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter and we're just starting Percy Jackson. My eldest is 5 and youngest is 4 and my partners little one is 7

I don't see a problem with the content of the books your daughters reading, and in all fairness most of it will probably go over her head, much like all the adult jokes in kids TV, maybe have a chat with her teacher and see if she can work with your daughter to find a book that they deem suitable and that your daughter enjoys

I would be worried if the teacher only refers to commonsense media, which as has been noted is an American site. I suspect that the wealth of books written by British authors won't be fully on their radar - as mentioned Rosemary Sutcliffe's Eagle of the Ninth wasn't on the list, but definitely a well known classic here.

WitchyMama3

Firstly, I'm super jealous of you right now, I love that your daughter is such an avid reader.

Dont worry I've got 3 who hate reading as well! If I try and read to DS8 he will say 'I'm just saying words that hes not even listening too' and DD3 is insistent that she doesnt need to learn to read because shes not going to like reading and wont want to read a book anyway so we would just be wasteing our time.

I can't imagine a better way to destroy a child's love of reading than forcing them to read books that neither interest nor challenge them. At age 10, I was reading books for older "tweens" and starting to weave in full on adult books, mostly mysteries. I find this utterly ridiculous.

I’ve heard it all now! South Park for a 7 year old!!! I have watched them all as an adult but themes such as bestiality and anal sex are in no way appropriate for pre teens. Exposing a 7 year old to that is abuse imo.

Just a thought. If it’s a quiet time, what about trying something she would not bother with at home, that can be a ‘harder’ read. David copperfield, swallows and amazons? The older classics can require patience and time, which is possibly what the school is offering. I grew up without internet, probably the only reason I got through those books!

And apparently more appropriate than Eastenders 😂 It’s no wonder schools feel they have to step in and advise parents about age appropriate material really

My children were all encouraged by me to read as I read a lot. They were reading the same books as me at twelve years old. We like fantasy and murder mysteries. I had to put it in writing to the Library that my children had my permission to read adult books. The school didn't encourage them to take their own books in they had to read books the school had. This was quite difficult for their teachers as my children read all the books quite quickly so there were none for them to read. If you think your child is capable of reading and grasping what the books are about then I don't see the problem. In this day and age kids grow up very fast and there should be no taboo subjects. We used to talk about our books after reading them and if I did think a book was not right for one of the kids I told them why and took it off them. It was easy enough.

I generally agree with you OP, suitability depends so much on the child and you cannot really generalise about age suitability. Generally speaking I don't think schools should be telling kids what they can and can't read, where, as here, it only impacts on that particular child, not on the whole class. There will be some kids in her class watching 15 or 18 films and playing 18 computer games at home. She is hardly going to be a bad influence on the rest of the class because she's read some YA books!

I use commonsensemedia a lot (mostly for films but sometimes for books) and although it gives a good guide, it is quite American in its outlook so rates things higher on age for things like alcohol and blasphemy than most people in the UK would. In fact it's so American that British books don't seem to feature on it a lot (I just looked up The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime which my 9 year old loved but which I suspect it would rate 14 plus and it isn't on there).

In case she hasn't read it yet, my advanced reader 9 and 11 year old's favourite book this year is Wonder (and commonsensemedia says age 10!)

I think yabu. Unless you’ve read the books for yourself you can’t be sure that it really is age appropriate. I used to love James Herriot and Enid blyton books at that age surely it’s not so hard to find books that will interest her? There is a big difference between what us ok for a 10 year old and what is ok for a 14 year old.