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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Tell me the amazing ways in which your DC AREN'T like you?

45 replies

AjasLipstick · 24/02/2018 08:22

I realised today that DD aged 13 is really very good with money. She went out with her friends to go skating and she only took twenty dollars with her when she had about forty in her room....she said "I'll take twenty but I won't need all that"

When I was her age that forty dollars would have burned a hole in my pocket and I'd have taken the lot...probably spent it all on slushies.

Younger DD....hugely socially confident. At complete ease in a crowd and navigates multiple friendship groups with ease...always getting asked to places with her mates etc.

I was NOTHING like that...I was shy and awkward!

What about your DC?

OP posts:

Idontbelieveinthemoon · 24/02/2018 09:27

DS1 has an affinity with animals that goes beyond liking animals as most people do; animals gravitate towards him without him trying. We have robins in the garden who'll sit on his palms when he goes outdoors, our rabbits will lie for hours on his lap, our six cats will spend their entire lives in his bedroom given chance and our dog is madly in love with him. At wildlife parks and zoos animals seem to respond to him. I call him the Disney Princess because it's like magic. Dogs we don't know will seek him out on walks and lie at his feet waiting for him to interact with them. Even the hedgehogs will come out at night while he's out there so long as he's quiet.

DS1 is also the happiest child imaginable. There are times when he gets into trouble or misbehaves but there's absolutely nothing anyone can do to dim his sparkle. He can find joy anywhere. I remember when he was little he did something naughty and we spoke about the consequence (I think I'd stopped him from going to a party) and he said to me "I don't mind missing the party because I just get to sit and snuggle with you". That determination to find the positive side to everything is absolutely not me!

He's also the most fiercely loyal child I know. He won't have a word said against anyone he loves, even in jest, and would defend anyone he cares about to the bitter end. I'm a bit "meh" about everyone but DS1 loves with absolute devotion.

DS2 has a fire in his belly that is the absolute opposite of me. I go through life being ok at things without needing to work too hard, he competes with himself and pushes himself to be the very best he can be. His stubbornness and tenacity mean he's already (at 7) very good at a couple of sports and has had little "we'll keep an eye on this one" comments often from coaches. Again, I'm alright at sports but DS2 works hard and excels at whatever he throws himself into. At school he's in the top set for everything not because he's exceptionally bright but because he pushes himself to learn everything he can about whatever they're studying. When each new topic is introduced he'll go to our local library and find books on it and devour them til he understands. His recall is amazing, too.

DH and I are quite similar in that we're both bright but I'm a bit lazy while DH is more like DS2 and pushes himself to be the best at everything. Both DCs have inherited the brightness but are very hard-working and diligent. It's lovely to think about how different they are.

wendz86 · 24/02/2018 09:27

Oh and she’s really flexible . Even at the height of my gymnastics and dance days I wasn’t as flexible .

Camomila · 24/02/2018 09:29

I was a bit of a shy/socially akward child and am an intovert now, DS is so friendly, chatty and extroverted a bit of a show off bless
He's also super polite and says 'bye bye' and 'thank you' without prompting.

musicposy · 24/02/2018 09:29

Both my girls are daring and brave and physically athletic. They can do the splits and dance en pointe and do the most terrifying ice skating jumps. They go on the scariest theme park rides without batting an eyelid.

I was the most pathetic wimp as a child and even now, anything physically scary terrifies me. I'm constantly proud of how much unlike me they are!

Thebluedog · 24/02/2018 09:34

I love this thread

My dd 6 is super confident and brilliant at anything she puts her mi d a and doesn’t give a rats arse what anyone thinks of her, she stands up for herself and is, in no way, a people pleaser like me. We’ve always said she’ll either be running the country or ruling ‘H’ Block by the time she’s 25.

My other dd 10 Will be the most amazing mother (if that’s what she decides she want) and has the patience of a saint (good job with her sister being the way she is)

TiredMumToTwo · 24/02/2018 09:35

My son often does the opposite of everyone else, he doesn’t mind standing out and has a clear understanding of who he is. I’ve always been overly compliant & a people pleaser so I love these qualities in him.

Meandmy4 · 24/02/2018 09:36

All mathematicians can read music and are very good at saving !

I cant even add up pre packed cake ingredients
I cant even keep up with whats going on in music videos on tube
My money has a habit of disappering into black holes

BikeRunSki · 24/02/2018 09:38

DS(9) can get a decent tune out of any instrument. He went to ukelle club for a year and graduated on to guitar lessons. Also had violin lessons at school. We recently got a keyboard for dd to have lessons and he’s self taught himself to the end of her books. He doesn’t sound like a kid messing about, he’s actually quite pleasant to listen to.

lollyj84 · 24/02/2018 09:38

Ds 1 is very confident and makes friends very easily.
Ds2 is very creative and making things.
i was very shy and didn't have many friends, def not good with my hands.

Fabellini · 24/02/2018 09:42

Ds1 has asd with associated learning difficulties. He’s a young man now, but has cast his spell over people since he started at nursery. Everybody he meets becomes incredibly fond of him.
This does not happen to me.
He is kind hearted, gentle, very funny, always extremely polite, and described everywhere he goes as “so lovely”.
I am not lovely at all, and have often remarked that he’s like this in spite of me and not because of me!

VaguelyAware · 24/02/2018 09:50

I am quiet & socially awkward; my DD is certainly not.
I am fairly short; my DD is one of the youngest but also one of the tallest in her class.
I am a natural "clean" type - I hate getting or being dirty, or general untidiness & disorder & find it very distressing. DD is quite happy in chaos & loves mud & rolling around at the park.

I'm more outgoing now, & less dirt-averse. Slightly.

imonaplane · 24/02/2018 10:08

My DS is very musical. He plays guitar, bass, keyboards and drums. He is also very clever and has a degree in a difficult subject. I have absolutely no talent whatsoever! All my children are over 6' tall and I am a shortarse.

user1488397844 · 24/02/2018 10:11

My DD is exactly like me. Infact my mum often comments that watching her now performing and dancing in a room full of people takes her back to me at the same age. She has an amazing memory, loves music & is very affectionate. She alsp loves to learn and is full of questions about the world. Unfortunately,like me,she is also a people pleaser and can struggle with her confidence at times so I hope she doesn't inherit all my bad traits! She's only 4 so plenty of time to see what kind of person she will become!

DenPerry · 24/02/2018 10:23

My nearly 4 year old is so confident, he just gets stuck into any situation wih anyone.. no shyness or holding back at all. We have the same giggly personality but I would always start off really shy and take ages to warm up, he just has no inhibitions or social worries. I love it.

girlandboy · 24/02/2018 10:31

Mine are very pretty and handsome.

Other than that, they're quite like me.

Nonibaloni · 24/02/2018 10:35

This is a lovely thread.
My ds can spell better than I ever could, autocorrect is my friend but he just needs to see w word once and he’s got it.
He’s also not a people pleaser. He’ll either be a serierl killer or a ceo. He will stand up to anyone if he thinks he’s right. He’s never rude or cheeky but I’ve seen him go up to strangers in front of a room full of people to say that X missed their turn. I can do that now but not at 7! It’s hard though because he can’t stand injustice and it’s impossible to explain why the world isn’t fair.

implantsandaDyson · 24/02/2018 10:37

My kids would be socially confident, can walk into a new group/setting and settle in right away. They don't have a problem putting their hand up, volunteering to take part in things etc - I wouldn't have done that.

The eldest is also quite sporty, loves getting out and about - running, playing a team sport - not so much with the joining in my case

All three of them have inately good rhythm. They can dance and do more than hold a tune. I can't clap in time - although their Dad is much more musically inclined.

JustDanceAddict · 24/02/2018 10:49

THEY are much brainier than I am. DD is gearing up for a science career and it’s so far beyond my comprehension that I’m just amazed!! DS (younger) also has that clever gene, DH is more science orientated, but even so hedidnt have that drive as a teen.
I was always much more interested in my social life and fancying boys!!
They’ve also got reasonable singing voices, esp ds, he’s quite musical.i can’t sing for toffee!

SluttyButty · 24/02/2018 11:01

My dd,18.She’s far more confident, good with money, has a very high iq, is very good at art, understands physics and chemistry, can concentrate without getting distracted.
Me,50. Not confident, fairly useless with money, not stupid but certainly don’t have her level of intelligence, can’t draw at all but can do a mean doodle, physics and chemistry are beyond me, I’m flighty and get easily distracted.
I’m sure there’s a million other differences

Rewn7 · 24/02/2018 11:13

DD(11) is a dancer - shes passionate about it and loves it. Hates to miss even one class, signs up to anything and everything she can. Her teachers and other parents always comment on how she's always smiling, and I'm often told she's a great example. I was too scared to join in anything as a child.

When she started secondary school she was terrified, crying each day, yet forcing herself to stop by the time she walked out the front door. I told her it would settle and to just focus on settling in. However, despite this terror, in those first few weeks she (of her own volition) put herself forward for form captain, gave a speech and was voted in by her peers. Then she also auditioned for a very hard dance team place, having never really done proper auditions before, and was one of only 4 girls in her year to get in to a team filled with pretty much all older kids. Watching her in their first show is a moment I am still so bloody proud of. How she handled starting secondary whilst suffering so badly with nerves is something I will never ever forgot - I was in awe of her bravery.

She's so much braver than I was at her age - and that bravery is in spite of worrying and anxiety not without it - she just doesn't let her nerves stop her. I was never like that and it stopped me from all sorts at her age.

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