Child maintenance.

[bbell22]

First time posting....ok so me and hubby separated back in Nov, we've got 3 kids. I stayed in home as had nowhere to go, 3 weeks ago finally moved into rental property. 2 youngest have come with me, eldest has stayed with him. I wasn't on the mortgage, but am aware "legally" I would be entitled to some equity from our marital home.

We've spoken tonight about maintenance payments. He's come up with a figure of £200 per month for the 2 kids. I've worked out that i should pay him £7 a week for my eldest as she's with him. He's self employed and so it's hard to work out what he should be paying as he doesn't have set income coming in each week. I work part time.

Any help, advice or comments would be appreciated. Especially if the £200 sounds a reasonable figure.....he says he doesn't want the £7 for eldest.

When we were still together he got a car on finance for 3 years and this cost £150 per month, he's said he'll let me keep this car and pay that for now as I'm driving the kids about.

TIA

*cant say

Why cannot mumsnet have a basic edit function.

I do have a job! I work 5 days a week! Wow. And yes I already said I know I have to pay for my daughter. I still have a relationship with her and run her about day to day and see her and buy and pay for her in other ways. That's just the amount the website came up with that I "should" be paying.

Before I had kids I worked full time and two jobs and never claimed for anything. I took the decision to not work while I had kids and stayed at home and had the privilege of being able to raise my kids. I didn't get married planning on my marriage failing but it did. So if I have to claim some benefits to manage now, I will.

Jeez, this reply is one reason I hesitated in posting for so long. I didn't need judgement or more guilt thanks, I just wanted a little bit of advice from people who may have been in the same situation.

The reality is that you need a solicitor, as they can work out the full picture. You are entitled to a share in the marital assets - including the equity in the house (its value less mortgage). The starting point for this is a 50:50 split. A parent who has given up a career to raise the kids can be awared more through the court.

The car is difficult, you are entitled to half its value but you have to look at whether that is worth £150 a month to you, or whether you'd rather the cash and a cheaper car.

The 21.5% I quoted is the cms amount. He would pay 25% of his income for 2 kids, (but 15% of it is disregarded for the 14yr old) works out at 21.5%.

Folks are twitchy about those with self employed partners as there is a lot of experience of them paying themselves minimum income (about £8200 pa so that they qualify for NI/ state pension etc) and paying anything in addition in benefits or dividends from their own company. This results in the cms saying that they pay around £12 a week, the receiving parent then has to chase HMRC for tax records to get anything else which is a tough game. This is why you are being asked about his income and if you have any proof of it.

If you have worked out you would pay £7 a week that suggests you earn just over £100 a week for 5 days that doesnt sounds not much but 15hrs at minimum wage would be about that. Hours I doubt you'd be able to change with 2 young kids.

Good luck with it all. But do take some proper advice and don't just agree to his scraps because of your guilt. You have 2 kids to raise and it is not their fault.

Thank goodness someone mentioned the £7 can't believe people are here saying £200 is not enough yet the op is saying she should only be paying £7.

And if you qualify for tax credits as a single person this income will also be used to calculate your maintenance payments for your daughter. From your comments about your ex it suggests he might not qualify for them?

I would check out the child maintenance website. It depends what you both earn and how many overnights at the non resident parents house.
For example if you both earn between £200 and £800 a week (gross wage) and the children have no over nights at the non resident parents house, you would have to give your ex 12% of your gross income for 1 child and he would have to give you 16% of his gross wage for 2 children. The gross wage is calculated after pension deductions.

Or you could come to a family based arrangement between you. As you both have at least 1 child to look after maybe you could both pay your own costs towards 1 of the children you look after. Then you could split the costs of the third child?

Op

How on earth can we tell you if you don’t tell us his income?!

Geeezzz

Child Maintenance is based of Paying Parents income only.

How assets are split can be agreed between yourselves or with help from Legal. Who or what caused the divorce will not be taken into account.

Hopefully you are both honest and provide full disclosure. Based on my divorce experience and listening to others if one or both partners turn the divorce into a contest or try and hide details of income, savings and assets it will drag on and legal costs will escalate rapidly.

In my case 35% of family wealth was consumed by legal costs. I would have preferred ex and child to have had received the money as total cost to myself was same regardless of which direction it went, ex or legal.

Hi, was supposed to be in court for a financial disclosure from ex..(covid).I have a decree nisi but not absolute. He has refused to give an honest financial disclosure since we split in 2011 and admitted lying by omission of bank statements for the mediation sessions. I'm at my wits end.
He moved in with another woman who is divorced and was receiving child maintenance from her ex husband for her 2 children. My ex and I have 3 children and he claims that he has had to pay for her children too as they were living at home. Now both those children are at uni and on apprenticeship in the forces. My children are 17 at college, 18 finished V11 Form and the eldest has left home. I've given up my nursing career to be a stay at home mum and after we split, took school term TA posts so I could provide childcare in holiday periods. My ex is supposed to have had them every other weekend and so pays that algorithm - but it hasn't been like that. We had an agreement that I stay in the house so long as I paid my half of the mortgage and all the bills although he has refused to take his name of the deeds even when I wanted to pay all the mortgage.
I can't go to court, I can't get financial disclosure, I'm now unemployed, I'm 55 soon. When the middle one goes to uni in September, I can't afford to live here- he has already informed me that his half of the mortgage counts for child maintenance but that was not the agreement. He has been a self employed computer consultant charging £60 per hour but has had a paid employment with a large firm since January. Nothing has changed - the C MS say his half of the mortgage counts. I think he earns 35000 min pa. His partner is on a similar wage- based on her job.
We had to remortgage because of his business debts and the baliffs turned up one day- it was a total shock to me. Now, 9 years on, with the children nearly grown up and solicitors fees of £5000 pounds, I'm on the point of losing my home. Why can't the Inland Revenue get the correct financial disclosure and collaborate with the C MS? It is so discouraging. I have applied for so many jobs and I feel as if all my experience as an RGN, an arts degree and my SEND TA work is not valued. My ex has sent a letter saying he wants my NHS pension as well. I'm so lucky to have good friends and lovely children. I want to have a small home for them to visit and stay but because of the remortgage (until I'm 70), I shall be lucky to find a place on a mobile home site- not what I had hoped for after working hard and raising my family.
I'm volunteering at the library with familis and making artworks as well as repairing the leaky house. I'm waiting on an interview and have applied for another post yesterday. If I can earn 13,000 pa, I'll be okay.
I don't understand - if circumstances were reversed, I'd be assisting my children and paying for shopping, not just the bare minimum required. If I could get the financial disclosure, I could prepare for the future. Any advice? Solicitor thinks he's waiting until they are all 18 then unless the court sees my circumstances, it will be 50/50 for the house after years of living on yellow stickers and charity clothes.

tiptop1985 Best to start your own thread.