To let an 8 year old walk alone 400m to school?

[hibbledibble]

I am wondering what is considered normal nowadays in terms of freedom.

1. At what age would you let a child walk 400m to school alone through a rural village? Quiet roads and safe rural community.

2. At what age would you let a child walk around 1 mile to school in a city? Rough area, with the walk partially through council estates.

I always find Britain amazing we do seem to live in a paranoid negative society.

We really don’t let kids grow up and learn about danger, risk and independence. Those kids that are mollycoddled are the ones mostly likely have a melt down freshers week when they are suddenly let free.

Our society is no more dangerous than a 100 years ago and in many areas much safer. Yet our kids we barely allowed any freedom to grow.

And yes I’d let my kids walk from 8.

My DD 17 has a friend who still isn’t allowed to the big city on the train without her parents in tow. In just over a year she’ll be off to uni.

Our school allows it from Year 4. A lot of the kids are roaming about the streets from much younger and a lot are very street wise.

Completely something that a school should be involved in.
It’s not happening at school per se but it concerns a pupil of theirs.

So, where do you draw the line on that?

Bedtime? What they have for breakfast? Which route they take to school as well as who takes them? What time they have their dinner? All affect their pupils, but, just like getting to and from school, are choices that are parents to make, not schools.

I think it’s really positive for schools to be involved in his kind of thing. Rather than seeing the children as their charges solely between 9-3, they are looking beyond that at the bigger picture, for the benefit of the child.

Arbitrary age limits that ignore the abilities and sensibilities of the child, and where each child lives in relation to the school, don't benefit the child.

How is stopping my child, who lives a short, safe walk from school, walking home and gaining independence and confidence because of a blanket age ban (probably put in place by a HT who doesn't know the area other than by statistics) remotely helpful?

I'm usually pretty pro freedom, I myself walked to and from school over a mile through our council estate and enjoyed this from about 7. However recently I read a fee thibgs that are putting me off round our local area, a man taking a child into a van, another man exposing hinself..in the adjoining village to us...paedophiles live in sleepy villages and in council estates they dont exclusively come from one type of person...Id be happier for my child to walk the dog alone as they'd have protection and a deterrent with them..but I think the school walk might be something U have to be q helicopter parent with.

From Y3 my ds walked about this distance to and from school. I don't get schools "letting them" and suspect this happens in more "middleclass" areas.

One thing I have noticed is that road sense is a lot less in those who have had less independence in their lives and anxiety greater.

Our school is most certainly not middle class!

To those parents that think schools shouldn't be involved.

You seem to forget that we have your children all day and we care about them. We see some of them coming to school on their own and whilst they may walk sensibly with you and appear to be able to walk to and from school by themselves we have often seen a different story. Crossing between parked cars, running across without looking, climbing high walls and walking along them etc. other parents also inform us.
If we let them go when parents say we worry about them. We occasionally have phone calls that they haven't arrived home then we start looking for them. Usually they are playing at the nearby park or it turns out they have gone to someone's house on the way back. Sometimes they turn up but you don't phone us back and tell us and we are still looking for them. Then we phone to find out they have been back for half an hour!
Our school is near two busy roads. We have had a child killed on the way to school and two knocked over on the way home. The staff were very upset. We are a family too. If you really want your child to walk go and see the Headteacher. We deem 8 is acceptable. What is wrong with picking your child up though?

To those parents that think schools shouldn't be involved.

There a difference between being involved and being the ones who make all of the rules.

Let parents decide for themselves and if there are any issues then speak to the parents.

Blanket rules don't help children develop at a natural pace. One of my daughters got to walk to and from school at a younger age than her sibling, because she's more sensible than her sibling. That's how life should work - let children develop and progress as and when they are ready.

Not apply blanket rules fitted to the lowest common denominator.

People go on about how babied and incapable a lot of teens are and this sort of thing doesn't help.

It also encourages parents to abdicate decision making, which is never a good thing. You know your child, and the area you live in, so take responsibility and work things in the most suitable way for your own child.

a) don't know - that wasn't my life
b) occasionally from age 10, and frequently from age 11 (though it fringed, rather than went through, an area with a dodgy reputation).

My thinking was that they were going to have to go two and from secondary school by themselves, and it was better if they had their first tastes of independent journeys on a route they were deeply familiar with.

Oh, and the school would only allow pupils to leave without an adult if they signed out in the 'home alone' register, and parents had to sign a consent form for them to be in that register. It was discouraged, but not entirely banned below year 5. London.

I don't think it was about limiting parental,choices, more about clarity on what those choices were.

I live in Germany in a village and young children aged 5 or so walk to school alone.

No one worries or if they do they still do it to breed independence.

Parents would never dream of staying at a birthday party either! It would be considered rude and far to helicopterish to do that.

400 meters through a village is fine. People are so strange about this in MN. Primary school children are treated like toddlers but suddenly expected to do long journeys to secondary school by public transport or long walks crossing major roads as soon as they start secondary, without a decent slow build up to it over the primary years.

All those saying your school won't allow it - what does the school policy actually say?

Ours says from KS2 = year 3 children don't have to be collected by an adult

I can't imagine my daughter being mature enough to go to school alone until she is at secondary school. She is 9 and we live opposite the school so it probably sounds ridiculous. But she doesn't want to grow up or have independence, she is scared of a lot of things and the idea of doing things alone worries her. It is hard also not to worry about the what ifs as well.

8 sounds fine for both.

Ds did both ways of a very quiet route solo from 6, thank God before the current paranoid headteacher started - the previous HT made it very clear that our children were our responsibility after 3pm (even in the playground). It was in fact younger than I was happy with for him to come home alone (fine to go to school) but our circumstances meant it would be helpful and I went with it.

Not surprisingly if you watch children you will see them take chances. The more children are out walking, the safer they will all be. If parents ring the school asking where their children are, try informing them that the school is closed and their childrens' whereabouts are their responsibility [cue sad face threads on mn]

I think it's one of those thibgs that will be massively dependent on the child, the area you live, the roads and schools policy.

Ds is the eldest in his year so a good 8 1/2 and would probably be fine in our rural village except there are 2 roads to cross which, whilst usually quiet are really busy at school time and does have lorries delivering to the 2 local shops. And whilst there should be a lollipop person on one of these bust roads that post has been vacant for 6 months.

So currently no I don't met him go alone. It's not I don't trust him - I dont trust some of the idiots in cars that I've seen do stupid risky things on the roads nearby

For me it's all about how safe are the roads. If there was a pelican crossing I'd be happy.

Which is why we say 8 because it is two busy roads in a city. No lollipop person that went about 20 years ago. Parents can go and speak to the Headteacher and one was allowed last year. If they were across the road I'm sure they would be allowed although some of the parents driving is something to be desired.

exfury we don't make all the rules just ones affecting the children we care about between 9.00 - 3:30pm. Not all parents make good choices. It is sad that that is the case but I am afraid it is. I am a parent and most of our staff are too. What age do you think they should be allowed home by themselves?I have seen siblings of two and a half out on bikes two streets away from their houses. Do you think we should let all the parents make that choice? So nursery kids could effectively walk home by themselves! Some parents like the rule as it supports their choice. The parents can speak to the Head if they don't agree.

My niece was driven everywhere in the car until she was 18. She lived in the countryside - on roads far too dangerous for an adult to walk or cycle on, never mind a child. Her parents were very over protective even in safe places like nice shopping centres.

She went to university at age 18 and is living in another city with a group of friends in a house share. She is getting on totally fine, enjoying going out at night but also keeping on top of her studies. She has a part time job. She travels home some weekends on the bus to visit her family.

She ia getting on totally fine despite not having much, if any, independence until age 18.

I must say I stand on my doorstep watching children aged from 6 to 18 walk to the school bus stop alone (never alone because all children walk, so in groups, but never ever with an adult because we live in Germany and it would be social death and undermining children's right to develop independence).

The 6 year olds universally walk more sensibly than the teens. Teens seem compelled to walk right on the edge of the kerb, and often looking down at a mobile phone. 6 year olds take the responsibility very seriously and do as they have been taught at kindergarten.

At the information evening before children start primary the community policeman encouraged parents to let their children walk to school in groups from year 1 having practiced over the summer, and assured us that the children who get knocked over in circumstances that they are partly responsible for are invariably young teens suddenly given freedom all at once after being driven to school throughout primary.

exfury we don't make all the rules just ones affecting the children we care about between 9.00 - 3:30pm. Not all parents make good choices. It is sad that that is the case but I am afraid it is. I am a parent and most of our staff are too. What age do you think they should be allowed home by themselves?I have seen siblings of two and a half out on bikes two streets away from their houses. Do you think we should let all the parents make that choice? So nursery kids could effectively walk home by themselves! Some parents like the rule as it supports their choice. The parents can speak to the Head if they don't agree.

If you dictate how children get home from school then that's making rules for beyond 3.30pm.

I think school should leave it up to parents. You can't make rules based on a parent who lets a two-year-old play on a bike - that's what your safeguarding procedures are for.

Parents should make the choice, absolutely. And if some parents are neglectful then that should be dealt with.

In many ways a blanket rule that forces a parent to collect may actually be hindering the school from seeing what the parents judgement is like. The fact I was allowed to walk home along a dangerous route (a busy road with no proper crossing) is one of the things that hinted to my school that all wasn't well at home.

One of my siblings is a primary school teacher. She doesn't have a very good handle on the capabilities of children outside the classroom though and massively underestimates what children can do outside of the environment she sees them in.

I think I'd walk my child to school (because I know they've got there safely) and then let them walk back on their own because I'll know within a few minutes if they are later than they should be.

I don't think it's up to schools to make rules on when a child can walk (or cycle) to and from school by themselves. That is a decision for the parents to make.

My ds didn't walk to school on his own until he was in year 6. He walked home from the summer term of year 5. And we probably live closer than 400m although there is a busy road (with a pelican crossing) to cross.

As for face timing all the way to school - you're more likely to have an accident if you've got your nose in a phone all the way.

We live in a very similar area to Op and the school say Y3 is the youngest for children to walk, but it is not a hard and fast rule as some Y2s live within 100 m .

we live about same distance to sons school. I always bring and collect him as its across a very busy road plus i have seen the way some of the kids mess about, stepping onto the road etc. I think il prob not let him until hes 10ish. We are getting a pelican crossing in at the minute too.

I guess we just beg to differ then. I think if we left the choice to parents some would let them come home from nursery - 2 1/2 year olds.