To ask for help for a middle aged woman who needs a fancy dress costume?

[BlessYourCottonSocks]

As in me. For ruddy world book day. Any suggestions for a size 18/20 menopausal woman will be gratefully received.

I need to be:-

1. Instantly recognisable to teenagers (CBA to spend the day explaining who I am to them)
   
2. Cool. Hot flushes combined with windows that don't open more than an inch means my favoured costume would probably be a bikini at the moment - if I didn't fear I would traumatise most of my students irreparably.
   
3. Comfy. See weight/age/menopause.
   
   I'm frankly lacking any brilliant ideas (other than asking the gurus of Mumsnet for help). I've been Cruella in the past. And Professor McGonagall. I'm not bothered about looking an idiot, particularly - I have little dignity at the best of times.
   
   Not sweating and being recognisable would basically do me. Any suggestions gratefully received!

[KeiraTwiceKnightley]

Mrs Coulter from Northern Lights. Dead sexy in a slightly dominitrix way. But you'll need a golden marmoset toy to be your daemon.

[Pollypudding]

The Queen of Hearts from Alice in Wonderland
The Snowman - could just wear a white sheet !
Auntie Em from a wizard of oz
A witch - from Roald Dahl or The Wizard of Oz

[beepthemeep]

"Where's wally" - jeans and red stripey top.

Jadis/white witch from the narnia chronicles - long white floaty dress and cheap tiara/fake fur wrap that you take off as soon as they've seen you

• Alice in wonderland - blue short sleeved dress, headband, done!

[SaucyJack]

A hobbit?

[GetOutOfMYGarden]

Trunchbull is brilliant

Molly Weasley, Mrs Twit, President Coin, Umbridge...

[AdaColeman]

Miss Havisham, you could sew or glue strips of ragged lace/net curtain onto a pale coloured summer dress. Net curtain veil with flower circlet head dress.
Hand out slices of fruit cake, everyone would love you!

[OwlinaTree]

Yellow hat (you can make from card) and a stuffed money - man in the yellow hat and curious George.

[Enuffsenuffsenuff]

The queen of hearts from alice in wonderland

[Titsywoo]

Following this thread. I'm a similar age and size to you and have a fancy dress party next month - theme is heroes and villians and I am NOT wearing any kind of catsuit so I'm struggling to think of anything!

[BlessYourCottonSocks]

Loving this Aunt Marge!

[cardibach]

Or stand up for literacy and refuse to do it? Complete waste of time, money and effort. Doesn’t raise literacy standards or even the profile of reading. Everyone buys/makes something easy - usually from a film in the case of kids.
Suggest everyone brings their favourite book to school and set up opportunities to say why they like it and for pupils and staff to share recommendations. Might actually do some good.

[MsChalloner]

Beatrix Lestrange - wand, Helena Bonham Carter hair and a mad expression?
Zorro? But they might not get that. Sadly, You can get outfits for this off the internet - sexy black hat, mask and a cape?
Like the suggestion of Where's Wally (see Miranda Hart dressed up us this in Miranda - very funny).
Cinderella? Going round all day missing one glass shoe might give everyone a clue...?
Nanny McPhee?

[Allgirlskidsanddogs]

A shadow hunter from Cassandra Clare? Totally black with wings, eBay black wings available for £4 and should be delivered by Monday if you order now, I think you need a sword too - DD’s dealing with that bit for herself!

[bridgetreilly]

I would definitely do Miss Havisham. Get a cotton nightie to use as the base layer, nice and cool. Then you just need tatty scraps of lacy hankies and some dusty cobwebs. Plus a tiara and talc in your hair to make it grey.

[BlessYourCottonSocks]

Oooh Miss Havisham! Mad old woman in a wedding dress....sounds like me.

(Goes off to hunt down lacy stuff..)

Any costume where I could eat wedding cake all day sounds appealing. Keep going folks!

[BlessYourCottonSocks]

Nanny McPhee is another possibility - I can probably do the warts and the hair on the chin if you give me another week or so without a pair of tweezers!

[SockEatingMonster]

Titsywoo may I suggest Donald Trump...

[beepthemeep]

Mmm, if you put Donald trump in a work of fiction, nobody would find him a plausible character

[AmUsername]

I'm going in jeans and a checked shirt this year and carrying a toy spider and pig!

Fern from Charlotte's web

[BlessYourCottonSocks]

Aunt Sponge? Fat in a frock and clutching a large fake peach?

[KC225]

Amy Menopausehouse

Black Amy Whinehouse wig (a tenner) and Amy transfer tattoos from Amazon. Amy make up especially the eyeliner and red lips. Black short sleeve t.shirt and with leggibgs or pencil skirt.

[KC225]

Oppps sorry just it was world book day. Although, you could pass it off as Amy Whinehouse The Biography

[ConfessionsOfTeenageDramaQueen]

Queen of hearts from Alice. I

[junebirthdaygirl]

What about nurse in Romeo and Juliet?

[MySqueeHasBeenSeverelyHarshed]

Fairy Godmother from Cinderella. The cape is not that difficult to make and it's very airy if you make it out of some light fabric (or a blue bedsheet would do.)

Here's a DIY: