Did anyone find that their child blossomed when they started secondary schoolL

[AjasLipstick]

I know it's not a typical AIBU but tough!

I wanted to know....because DD is 13 and we live in Australia, she began high school in January and has just grown happier and more confident.

It was the opposite for me!

I shrank!

I think she was bored in primary school and there are more challenges now....did your child blossom or were they like me?

You can find your tribe in secondary. Primary was stressful socially.
I really agree with this. I worried so much about dd going to her comp, but it's been such a big improvement on primary school. She's so much happier.

Mine has especially loved having different teachers, I think by the end of year 6 lots of children start to really switch off from the hearing the same voice. Not sure how it could work but in KS2 I think they would really benefit more crossover of teachers for different subjects. Would probably not be cost effective I suppose.

My dcs are only babies, but I think I came out of my shell when I hit 15 or so. 11-13 I didn’t enjoy school at all.

Dd was a quiet child in primary. Despite choosing her school carefully, still we encountered bad teaching, big staff turnover att scgool, very badly behaved kids disrupting lessons and she couldn't get away from that, being in the same class, lack of discipline, lack of management... Even if she changed classes there used to be different set of kids with behaviour issues, disrupting lessons ie throwing chairs at the teachers!

Changed schools for better behaved cohort and better discipline at school but still hard to find her type of people.. Nowhere to escape. She became invisible among badly behaved or loud kids.

Now in secondary school and from the very beginning she's been noticed for all the good reasons, she found her kind of kids and variety of stimulating -fun after school clubs. Communication from the school is excellent. We are spoolt really.
She is developing into a very confident, well balanced young person, who knows what she wants.
Secondary school has been great so far.

Mine has just started and yes. She's loving it all. Which is great!

Good the hear parents saying they've blossomed, too many parents complain that their children have become stroppy and surly, blaming the school rather than their age!

Lovely to read these comments.
I used to work supporting transition from primary to secondary and this happened quite often. Primary teachers would often say things like 'she's really ready to move up' or 'he's getting too used to being at the top of school and needs to be pushed a bit and have others to look up to'. And most secondary pastoral teams were really good about trying to engage all children in Year 7, especially those who had been identified by primary as potentially going to struggle with transition due to lacking confidence/being isolated/coasting academically/being a bully to other children etc.

Children who had families and teachers who encouraged them to enjoy all the differences in secondary school, like new friends, subjects and activities - even if they didn't know anyone else in the club/team etc and weren't in the same class as their primary best friend - always seemed to do best.

I have often said that I hope DD finds her tribe at secondary so it's lovely to hear that some do!

I was like this. I hated Primary school and found it too constricting.

I’m a natural planner and the timetabled nature of high school helped me feel much more in control. I knew what I’d be doing when and where.

I had control over my studying and homework and could organise my own work.

And as other posters have said, I also found “my” people.

my dd struggled daily at primary. could fit in. quite a dominant group of girls in her class. She's started secondary school now and is flying high. really wonderful to see my shy, unconfident, little girl turn into a bright happy confident young lady, who cannot get enough of all the after school clubs and sporting fixtures. Im so proud of her.

couldnt fit in, not could

I did.... i never felt like i fitted in at primary and was very shy, when i started secondary i made friends im still friends with now and felt like i had found my "people" which gave me much more confidence and i enjoyed everything much more

Yes, my DD2 was like that. She didn't enjoy primary - she was a bit quirky and couldn't find a peer group, and she didn't take 'naturally' to literacy-based subjects, and both of those things dented her confidence. In secondary she was able to find a small but very supportive friendship group - and I have to say, this was helped a lot by fantastic teachers who got to know the children very quickly and took opportunities to direct them to activities where they'd find each other (e.g. a photography club). The wider curriculum, and especially more technology-based subjects was also helpful for DD, and being able to make progress in those subjects made her more confident overall. By the time she'd been in secondary for a term she was loads happier about going to school and so much more outgoing in every way.