Child Maintenance Payments

[powders]

to ask what this money should and shouldn't be used for and when paying the CSA calculated amount each month that should be it, no additional money for extras unless a real one off.

i can honestly say that if I was a millionaire I would still claim child support for my children from their father. Why? Because he helped bring them into the world and therefore he should help pay for them. It’s the right thing to do.

Which is why it really pisses me off when certain people (including ex) think he deserves a bloody medal for paying his child support

CMS is what is decreed to be fair. It's up to him if he wants to pay extra. If you buy them clothes keep them at your house, though, or you'll be buying new each week. They will arrive wearing shoes, so no need to buy them, surely?

My ex pays more than CMS (usually). He buys clothes, nappies, wipes, food for when he has dd. We go half’s on shoes(main pair of fitted ones) and coat, don’t see the point us both having them. He also pays for dd’s swimming and for a annual pass to a local play farm, which we both use.

I spend it on whatever the hell I want and so long as his daughter is well taken care of I don’t expect him to have any issue with that!
Heck, I get it weekly and when I get it today I’m using it to pay some of my holiday off (which I’m not even taking my dd on )

I think it’s worth bearing in mind that no parents, HAS to pay for school trips, after school clubs, swimming lessons....
Of course that means the child would miss out though.

I personally couldn’t be in a relationship with a man who could afford to and didn’t contribute to those things for no other reason than, ‘I pay my cms so I don’t have to’.

I personally couldn’t be in a relationship with a man who could afford to and didn’t contribute to those things for no other reason than, ‘I pay my cms so I don’t have to’.

Er... doesn't the CMS payment include a contribution towards these other things? Shouldn't the parent with care be expected to contribute a similar proportion of their income to the care of the child? Doesn't the PWC also receive (usually) Child Benefit and (often) tax credits?

Er.....which is why I said contribute, not pay in full Collaborate as I said no parent HAS to pay for afterschool activities or trips etc it’s not a basic need.

CMS is the basic minimum payment that a non resident parent HAS to pay. I class that as a contribution to housing, heating, food, clothing, everything I’d class as a basic need.

The parent with care will be paying a considerably greater amount than the NRP though. Unless that NRP is earning huge amounts.

I get £28 per child. It doesn't even cover the cost of petrol to get them to school let alone put a roof over their head. NRPs for the most part get off very easily.

Apparently the average cost to raise a child from birth to 18 is £230,000 (I know that will vary a lot, but as a guide) if my ex payed cms rate he’d pay £67,00 from birth to her turning 18.
So who pays the rest.......

£67000 over 18 years isn't very much at all. That's only £310 a month.

And remember, that both parents usually provide a home for the child. If you aggregate the cost of providing two homes for the child the absent parent is already providing. Shouldn't have to pay towards the cost of the other parent having a house with an extra bedroom.

Which is why it's pointless trying to say what maintenance should or shouldn't be for. It is what the law says an absent parent should be paying. No more, no less.

I would say it should cover what the children need on a day to day basis.

I would say it should cover 50% of the total amount to raise his DC.
Does the fact that he is your DP now instead of her DP/DH change his responsibilities towards his DC?

I think it is you who needs to manage your household accordingly and stop thinking that paying the CMS bare minimum towards the DC, he helped create, makes him reasonable.

A reasonable father wouldn't need to be told how much to pay for his DC, he would know he should be continuing to contribute equally to the real cost of raising his DC, whether he is with their mother or not.

The paying parent should be covering all the costs of the child when in their care, including clothing. The child maintenance should cover 50% of the costs of the child when they are with the other parent. If there is shared care then the child maintenance is reduced, so the paying parent should also be covering their share of large expenses such as school residential trips, and items shared between houses such as school and sport shoes.

Child support should cover half the costs of clothes, food, childcare and school related costs. Any hobbies that a parent signs up to should be paid by the parent booking them. I'd expect a NRP to have toys, clothes etc at their home to save the children feeling like visitors with an overnight bag.

As both will need somewhere for them to stay then rent / heat etc is irrelevant as both will pay their own housing costs as they would have these anyway.

£67000 over 18 years isn't very much at all. That's only £310 a month.
No it’s not Collaborate.

If he did pay that, it wouldn’t even cover two days of childcare, let alone anything else.

And yes he has housing costs and she has a bedroom there (seen as it was our home at one point). But I know he’ll hardly have the heating on when dd’s not there, he only has her one night, so one bath time one maybe two outfits to wash plus one sleepsuit, I doubt he changes her bedding every week, seen as it’s slept on once.
So water, gas, electricity will all be lower than mine, plus of course food, nappies, wipes, shampoo, lotions and all the rest. And he has the added advantage of being able to work when ever, no restrictions on start or finish time due to childcare hours.

And that’s why I said I couldn’t be in a relationship with someone who thinks paying the CMS legal amount, means that everything is covered and isn’t willing to help with extras.

I receive child support from my exh and I don't keep it "separate" from my other money. Everything just goes into my bank account and gets spent on what's needed. I hate this attitude of wanting to know exactly what every penny of maintenance is spent on. Thank goodness my exh is a reasonable man and doesn't even think to ask.

yellow actually rent and heating costs ARE relevant, because if I were childless I wouldn't need to live somewhere with 2 bedrooms, I would manage in somewhere a lot smaller and would be paying less rent.

I don't ever ask for any extra from my DS's father apart from when I need to buy new school uniforms as they're bloody pricey.

Nell I'd just text back "Fuck off" - cheeky bitch

I disagree about the activities actually..assuming the NRP is eow only then its always likely to be the RP that organises / books etc but hopefully with some level of consultation with the NRP. I don't think the NRP, assuming they are happy for the child to do the activity, should expect the CMS basic to cover that.

You don't think your partner should buy his children shoes and clothes to wear at their home? You said 'his house' .You don't think of your partner's house as their home , do you?