...to put a stop to this?

[Megameanmummy]

I’m genuinely confused about what to do. DS15 has, what we thought, a friend who happens to be a girl (hasn’t known her long) She is 13. DS is a vulnerable youngster (hidden disabilities). Tonight I caught them snogging in the dining room. I was outside and saw them through the window. DH was in another room and completely oblivious. I called DS in and said I thought they were just friends. He said he loves her.... What do other parents do in these circumstances? We’ve been through everything (safety, age etc) with him so many times but he just acts on impulse (part of his disability). I know he wants to feel that closeness with someone. He’s a kind attractive boy and girls tend to like him but he can’t seem to say no to them. I just don’t know where to go from here.

SometimesMaybe
It IS lovely he’s doing normal teenage things, thank you.
I’m just going from A straight to Z in my thinking...

Not at that stage with DS yet (he has autism/learning difficulties) he's 13. But I think if I were you I would get in touch with her parents, she is very young and I think they both need guidance and it would be better if you could all keep an eye on things.

He's 15. Next year he will be over the age of consent and if he wants to have sex - and has a willing partner - there won't be much you can do about it. Snogging at 15 sounds perfectly reasonable. To be honest snogging at 13 sounds perfectly reasonable.

I totally get it. One of my dc has adhd - very in the moment, no consequences. On the plus side he is rule driven. So keep reinforcing

www.additudemag.com/safe-sex-tips-help-teens-adults-adhd-impulsive/

www.additudemag.com/talking-about-sex-with-your-teen-with-adhd/

Some fab links here, thank you.
The ADHD attitude mag one makes so much sense. I just hope we can drum it into him.

I can see why you're worried. If he is nearly 16 the possibility of it going further may mean him sleeping with a 13 yr old which is against the law. You don't seem to think he will understand this is wrong/the potential consequences.
You need to have a serious discussion with him and if you are still concerned I would be monitoring the situation closely and possibly speaking with the girls parents.

Yes, he’s so impulsive he won’t think about the consequences. We have so many talks with him and he nods and agrees but we can tell it’s not going in 😐. School and CAMHS are on board too.
I’ll try and talk with her parents but judging by what we hear about her home life, I’m not sure they’ll be that interested sadly. So I’m looking out for both of them. We do want him to be as normal a teenager as possible.

Its a good thing he is seeing her at home and feels comfortable bringing her to your house, my mum was always welcoming of boyfriends when I was younger. I used to think my mum was really cool but she says that she didn't want me to feel the need to sneak around behind her back.
If you put a stop to it would he be more likely to find somewhere outside the home to meet her? At least if they under your roof you can protect them both.
Ahhh teenage love

Yeah, we’re that house. All descend here, which definitely works in our favour. But the conversations 😮

I can imagine! Be the cool mum (whilst spying from afar) Good luck OP!

He's 15. Next year he will be over the age of consent and if he wants to have sex - and has a willing partner - there won't be much you can do about it.

Did you read the OP’s posts? He has asd and add and doesn’t think of consequences. She will still be underage.

Still think the OP shouldn’t worry?

She’s being very sensible.