Crying it out

[firsttimemum889]

My baby is 16 weeks and is waking up every 45 mins during day and night . Am struggling and hate the night tome i cant wait for the morning but the feeling that i have to do this all over again is breaking me .
Now i read alot about self settling crying and no cry solutiins . I cant bear to hear him crying so i dont think i can do the ferber method or anything similar but the no cry methods are not working at all

However i was just thinking about car rides my little one hates his car seats and usually when am driving alone with him he will cry and cry untill eventually giving up and falling asleep . Aibu to thinknam already doing crying out this wAy ? Does everyone else stop to soothe their babies while driving ? If not I what is so sifferent about the ferber method ?

16 weeks is too young for crying it out. Or any other kind of sleep method, I think. At that stage, I don't think they've figured out day and night yet. Is your LO going through a growth spurt? Or maybe has reflux or is hungry or something?

Can you get someone in to help you with nights? Or to watch them during the day so you can get some sleep?

Have you looked at sleep regression advice? I cant remember what it advised to do sorry but i distinctly remember it saving my sanity when dd was about that age.

I know he is too young for any sleep training i was just wondering if i am doing that unintentionally while driving and if i should stop the car to soothe him .
I have no one here to help except my husband who is working full time so i feel bad making him stay up all night .
He is on medication for reflux since 3 weeks and he is doinf alot better . He has been like this for the last 2 -3 weeks he used ro sleep for 5 hours straight before and then wake up every 2 to 3 hours which was heaven compare to now i just dont think i can go on for much longer like this

Have you tried a dummy in the car? DS hated the car and still does. A dummy seems to keep him calm though and he drops off to sleep pretty quickly.

For night times DS was exactly like that and it lasted a good few weeks (15 weeks old until nearly 5.5 months). Cosleeping was the only solution as it allowed him to join some of his sleep cycles together - it meant we got about 2 hours between wake ups instead of 45 minutes-1 hour, and it also gave me enough sleep to keep me sane. The 4 months sleep regression was horrible but seems like a distant memory now we're in the 10 month one

OP your baby crying and then settling in the car isn't the same as cry it out. The movement of the car will be comforting to him and he can hear your voice.

Don't worry, this phase will pass. My DC3 had reflux and hated the car seat too.

Oh got another 2 months of this ? How do people cope ?? I am sure you realised ita my first !
I did say that if he continues beyond 6 months i will sleep train ! Lets see if i can bear it !
Oh and he has a dummy the metdown usually happens regardless of that in the car

Any age is too young for cry it out, it's cruel and stressful for a baby.

Sounds like the four month sleep regression - sadly my twins didn’t come out of it until about 16 months! We found loud white noise really helpful about this stage.

6 months is too young to sleep train.

Do you feed him when he wakes up-could he be hungry?

It's probably the 4 month sleep regression, it will pass

My DD is also 16 weeks old and going through a very similar thing at the moment! Have you looked at the wonder weeks app? 16 weeks is approximately the time for leap 4 and there is some advice of how to help them through the leap. I don't honestly know how much difference it's making but it's helping to keep me sane!

I am ff . if he is not settlling i give him a bottle but he hardly takes any so i dont think he is hungry every hour
I do have the wonder weeks my book says the next leap is on the 19th week ?

Hi, this sounds like the 4 month sleep regression, DD was very similar. Co sleeping saved us. Kicked DH out of bed (he sleeps downstairs ) now DD and I share, she sleeps amazingly and I feel sane again. It's worth researching safe Co sleeping if you want to give it a try. Best of luck!

omg do not sleep train a reflux baby!! He is waking as he is in pain. Go and get better medication and a treatment plan from someone good like Dr Shah at Gt Ormond St and learn about reflux. I wanted to slit my wrists at 16 weeks when I read that it would probably go on until the baby was nearly 1... but forewarned is forarmed. You'll adapt and get into the pattern.
my kids were much better by 10-11 months and I did sleep train because I was convinced - absolutely sure - the reflux was gone. Please don't do it to a 4 month old.

Does he go back to sleep if you give him milk? Even if he only takes a little bit?

@RosyPrimroseface he is on medication and anti reflux milk and he seems alot better ! Pediatrician reccomends weaning early because of reflex . I did not think he is waking up from reflux as he is not arching back etc or throwing up so i thoufht the reflux is gone . Did you wean early ?
I tried co sleeping he is more unsettled
@BertrandRussell i do not give milk everytime he wakes up only if its been a couple of hours since his last feed eg if he drank 180ml at 23:30 and wakes up at 12:30 1:30 2:30 i will only feed at 2:30 and then he only takes 2 to 3 ounces

4 months and 6 months are way too early to sleep train. It’s the 4 month sleep regression and it’s hard but it does end. I found co sleeping helpful during this time but you have to find what works for you

I stopped the car. Timed journeys with naps. And ultimately reduced car journeys as much as possible.

Reflux medication dosage needs to be adjusted as your baby’s weight increases.

Cry it out is considered to be neglect in many countries because you are failing to respond to your baby’s need. Even those people who do advocate cry it out say it is unsuitable for under one year olds.

For the age of your baby they are sleeping well. You need to adjust your expectations.

You baby could be hungry and at that age I would offer them milk when ever they wake.

@Makingworkwork adjust my expectations he is sleeping well ? Are u kidding me he is waking up every hour how is that well ? Most people i know with babies at the same age they usually sleep for a long strech and then wake up every 3 hours !
I didnt say i ll do cry it out there are other ways of sleep training i only said if me driving and him crying to sleep is cry it out

This really sounds like the 4 month sleep regression.
Lasted 2 weeks with my youngest & we just co-slept as it was easiest to settle him.

Crying it out really isn’t advisable for a baby that young.

23:30 and wakes up at 12:30 1:30 2:30. I am afraid waking four times a night is normal durring the 4 month sleep regression.

Oh got another 2 months of this ? How do people cope
I promise you will. It is a really tough time and it does seem impossible (I remember it well and most mothers will sympathise) but somehow you do get through it. Things gradually change. Have a hand hold from me.