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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel bad for sleeping on sofa

13 replies

ExhaustedAndHormonal · 15/02/2018 00:06

I feel awful as it's the only place I can get comfy for a few hrs at night.. 37 weeks pregnant and just uncomfortable. I just always feel bad.
I go to bed with dp. We always go at same time. But after two or so hours of just not being comfortable I go to lounge and try and get comfy (maybe mumsnet a little too lol) generally dose for about, 3 hrs then try and get back into bed
I think I feel bad as many yrs ago when he was with his ex, the min she was pregnant he was booted to spare room and that's where he stayed... Until his dc was 5 yrs old! They split at that age too.
So I think that plays on my mind.

He never ever says anything , just says he misses me being in there but totally understands why I go to the sofa. And always always says as long as I rest and get some sleep it doesn't matter etc.
He's offered to go on sofa or in DS room but I do feel I have more back support on sofa and it's a bit cooler too.
It don't help the mattress is nearly at the end of its life, but I refuse to buy one until after the birth as knowing me my waters would go on a lovely new mattress.. Lol.
So that's first thing on the agenda when he's on paternity leave..

I just hate feeling bad for sleeping elsewhere... Maybe its my hormones or something

OP posts:
RedPandaMama · 15/02/2018 00:08

You're heavily pregnant. It's ALL about you until the baby comes! Don't overthink it and just get as much rest as you can. Get yourself a long sausage pillow from Amazon or Mothercare they are life-changing x

Original poster
ExhaustedAndHormonal · 15/02/2018 00:14

I tried one of them. Made me feel claustrophobic haha. So gave it to sis in law as she's due a few days before me..

OP posts:
Butterymuffin · 15/02/2018 00:18

It's not long to go now. I'd just keep reminding him of that and of the mattress. In fact, hadn't he better order it now? They can take a while depending on the type.

Original poster
ExhaustedAndHormonal · 15/02/2018 00:21

Good point.. :) Well need to go look together when he has a day off. May do that Saturday..
He's been saying just get one now.. ( well since I've been uncomfortable) but I'd rather wait until after...

OP posts:
MonkeysMummy17 · 15/02/2018 00:21

I'm sure he understands, a few more weeks and you'll be able to go back in your own bed. I wouldn't let this stress you it, so long as your DP knows why you do it then it's really not a problem and you getting rest is much more important than staying in a bid you can't sleep in to save the feelings of your DP Flowers

EatTheChocolateTeapot · 15/02/2018 00:24

Get a terry backed waterproof sheet for the new mattress?

maddening · 15/02/2018 00:28

I was in the sofa for the last month, never attempted bed once it was too uncomfortable- though use the mattress protector on the sofa instead

Original poster
ExhaustedAndHormonal · 15/02/2018 00:29

He definitely understands. He often comes to the lounge in the night and if I'm awake hell sit with me and we just chat etc. But I then send him back to bed as he works long hours. Like I say he never moans or anything. I think it's just me worrying and most of the time I know I'm being silly but then there's late at night when I'm knackered and my brain wonders off and feels bad....
Counting down the time now

Thats a good idea about the waterproof one. We have just a normal protective cover now but will look at them too.

Ohh now I'm thinking of mattresses again lol

OP posts:
negomi90 · 15/02/2018 00:42

You'll need a protective cover because even if your waters don't break on it, the little one will be on your bed at some point and leakages/messes/spills will happen.

yorkshireyummymummy · 15/02/2018 00:56

I had to do this too.
And because of chronic abdominal pain I have spent many a night on the sofa since.
Just got a new sofa ( hoorah) but I don’t like sleeping on it. It’s not as comfy and supportive. ( don’t tell anybody but I miss my old sofa. I’m genuinely thinking about getting an extension so I can buy the same sofa again!! Hubby will g9 bonkers!!)

Just tell him you love him, explain it’s not forever and for him to enjoy the bed and his unbroken sleep. Cos it’s all going to change soon and he may not get many unbroken nights for the next 2/4/5/8/10/18/ever years (delete where appropriate).

MrsDilber · 15/02/2018 01:40

I wouldn't worry about it. Just be where you can get some rest.

SnowGoArea · 15/02/2018 01:45

Not quite what your thread was about, but I recommend Hippychick mattress protectors - waterproof, soft, not plasticy, and can be tumbledried. I gave birth on my bed and the mattress remains as good as new Smile

Sarahrose21 · 15/02/2018 03:00

After being in your position over December and into January I would say buy the mattress asap! Put a waterproof cover on it (I used the pampers baby bed protectors) even once baby is here you could have a couple of weeks of lochia bleeding which can sometimes leak but you're going to want to.be as comfortable as possible and if your current mattress is preventing that you need to change it.
P.S hang in there... the last couple of weeks are hellish but totally worth it when you have baby in your arms!

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