To feel like this?

[happytobemrsg]

Yesterday my 19mo DS had 2 fibrul convulsions. After the second, during which he turned blue, we called 999 for an ambulance. I was assured it was on the way. 25 minutes later there was no sign so I called 999 again to be told nothing was on it's way because all of the ambulances were in use. DH drove to the hospital whilst I held DS in my lap. Eventually he was diagnosed with a v high temperature caused by throat infection.

I have never been so terrified in all my life. I felt so powerless. Every time I close my eyes I see it happening. I know these convulsions are quite common but in the moment it's horrific.

DH & I were planning on TTC #2 in a few months but I don't think I can face having another little person who I love with all my heart & cannot protect. Im probably over tired & DH said the pain of yesterday will fade. But right now I don't think I can try for another baby. AIBU? Feeling pretty fragile & to be honest - shattered - right now.

Hope your little one feels better soon. You will naturally feel anxious after witnessing something like that happen to your child but you got the help you needed and he is fine.
These things happen sometimes unfortunately but you will be prepared and know what to look out for in the future. I found my experience with my first DC absolutley terrifying....I knew nothing, by the time I had the 2nd and 3rd I'd had some experience with the usual childhood illnesses and was able to take a calm approach (still worried but less panicky!)
By the way your definatly not being unreasonable to feel the way you do. xx

I think the best thing you can do is ALLOW yourself to feel terrified, anxious, exhausted, and tentative about having another child. Your feelings are all entirely reasonable and understandable. You need a bit of time and rest to process this horrible fright. It's perfectly ok for your emotions to be wrecking havoc with your mind. I do think your husband is right - you will get over and get through this. Don't overload yourself with trying to decide if you want more children right this very minute. You have plenty of time to figure this out later.

My ds had a febrile convulsion when he was 18 months due to an ear infection. Was the scariest moment of my life so far! I ‘slept’ next to his cot for 6 months afterwards I was so shaken by it. Even now when he’s not well I sometimes do the kiss test on his forehead - this has to be when he’s asleep though as he’s now a 6ft2 16 year old and it’s apparently not cool and is embarrassing It’s understandable that you’re anxious at the moment

I went on to have another dc and she’s never reacted to an illness or temperature.

My elder son had febrile convulsions as a result of a very high temperature when he was eighteen months old. I actually thought he was dying as his eyes rolled back in his head and he went absolutely motionless but later learned that that’s the body’s way of coping with the temperature, seemingly. Following that episode i was given suppositories to give him if it ever happened again. I had to use them just once, as tepid sponging was enough to usually bring down the temperature after that. It’s a very frightening thing to see but please don’t let it put you off having another baby. If it ever happened again you’d know what it was and what to do. Our second son never had convulsions. Both of them are now grown up and fortunately were rarely sick as children and teenagers.
So please try not to worry about your baby and any future babies you’ll have. You’ll be a great mum and will be able to protect and care for them.

My nephew had 6 febrile convulsions within a few hours earlier in the month . Due to tonsillitis. He was blue lighted to hospital and after a few hours A+E discharged him even though his temp was still 38.something ! He had another whilst waiting in the waiting area for my brother in law's Mum to pick them up he was rushed back through and his temp was just going up and up and he had 4 more that night.

It's bloody scary !!! My son was still getting them at the age of 7 which the doctor's couldn't work out coz apparently they do outgrow the temperature related fits !

I think you will be scared for a while , anxious just keep an eye and don't let this put you off having more children . These things happen . He will be on the mend in no time .

DS is now 8 and has epilepsy. Ive had a blue unresponsive child so many times in my life! Unfortunately seizures are now quite low in priority.
We basically moved house do we are 3 mins from MIL and 6 mins from hospital. Someone drives and I support DS in rear of car.... He's usually and rescue meds and needed glucogel by this point!
It's scary to start with .... Then it's the norm!!!!
Hopefully your DS will grow out of this or never have one again!!