To ask how you coped moving out independently for the first time?

[Halie]

I've been looking online for practical advice about moving out independently for the first time. I'm in my 20's and single. Unfortunately all the advise I find is aimed at young people going off to university and that's a totally different situation.

I don't want to give too much detail about myself but basically I'm an adult stuck in a situation that I've been trying to get out of for years and I need to leave now. The soonest I can leave is early next year so this is when I intend to leave. I am not entitled to any benefits and do not currently earn any money but I will have a well paid job early next year so long as I keep on track, pass a few exams and make some strong early applications. But I don't know about things such as:

• Can I just secure a job and leave? How quickly does the process take from securing rented property to moving in?

• How do I get a place to live? I'm looking at renting because I can't afford a mortgage and I don't want one at this point in my life (not sure where I want to live permanently). So do I just look online and call people - how does it all work? What will I need in terms of documentation?

• How much money will I need minimum? I'm not entitled to anything and no one can help me in terms of friends/family but I've been saving over the years.

• How do I learn how to pay bills/council tax etc?

Basically, I feel like I don't know how to do this. I already suffer from anxiety and it's almost tipping me over the edge not knowing how to be independent and worrying how I'll cope by myself. I feel like most people don't deal with this (maybe I'm wrong?) because they move out with a partner and two wages or they are assisted by family. I have a very very thin safety net for the next 12 months in terms of support but it's going to vanish and then I'm alone. I feel vulnerable, alone and as if I have no practical life skills. I'm frustrated because I've been trying to be independent for years and with each year I seem to lose more confidence in my ability to be an independent adult. I cannot remain in this situation any longer, for my own sanity and also because my support network can no longer support me.

How do I do this alone? Is there anyone or anything (a guide or something??) that gives a step by step plan of doing this alone? I don't know what I'm doing, I'm worried sick and it feels as though I'm completely alone. I only have myself to depend on and I'm worried about messing up.

@mikesh909 Thanks - I've had a look on rightmove etc and there are very few places that accept pets but they are definitely out there. I've found 'pets considered' on quite a few so I'll keep trying. In terms of asking around informally - I really don't know how that works. I don't know any landlords or anyone who knows one (my friends/family own their own homes or live in council property). But I'm definitely willing to make compromises on location/property type because leaving my dog is not an option at all. In terms of location, I'm in the north so rents are relatively low - I can move anywhere really as I don't have a strong support network in one place so it makes no difference where I go. It all depends on where I get my job. I'm willing to go anywhere in the UK where I can get a job and which has an affordable cost of living.

@Dragongirl10 I am genuinely considering the buying option. Before doing Nursing I worked full time so I have a deposit which is enough for help to buy - but it would be just enough. But there are pros and cons of both renting and buying so I need to weigh it up.

@NerrSnerr I was working during the first year and a half but now it's just too much to cope with and I realized it was a choice between extra cash and jeopardizing my career or being poorer but graduating and getting a job. So ultimately, I'm focusing on getting through the rest of this year until the summer, picking up some work in the summer and doing 3rd year without a job and purely focusing on graduating with a high 2.1 or maybe a 1st. I'd be willing to go on the bank between my last placement and getting my pin - do you think that's practical or too short a timeframe? Going by this thread and googling I think I have enough in savings to move out initially and if I think it might be a struggle initially I'll look into a credit card/overdraft with low interest rates.

If you do decide to buy op just keep in mind that you can fix your mortgage for 5 years or so, and rates are historically very low, your income should creep up in that time, whereas rents will probably increase each year.

Also do consider if you could stretch to a 2 bed property to buy and have a lodger, l did this twice, once for my first flat and it enabled me to make my mortgage payments easily, and again 10 years later when l moved to London and prices were astronomical, again it was purely having a lodger that enabled me to buy at all.

The added advantage for you is potential company, and maybe dog walking when you are working shifts. Just worth considering.

As well as help to buy, you could look into shared ownership. I'd advise going for one where you can staircase to 100% ownership, as some won't let you go higher than 75%.

Let people know you're looking for somewhere to rent. You never know, someone you are studying with, or any of the staff, might know someone looking for a tenant or lodger.

I think you might still be able to rent a room, though the other/s may want you on trial for a couple of weeks to see if the dog is a nightmare. I may rent out a room in my house in future. If I liked your dog and he didn't bark at night or pee on the floor I would still take you.

I've seen people looking for accommodation on our local community page on Facebook as a way of tapping into private rentals/shares outside an agency. I can imagine planning a campaign - start by commenting sensibly on local community posts, post a pic of your dog if the opportunity arises, get people aware of you on the group and feeling sympathetic toward you, rather than presenting as a complete stranger suddenly appearing wanting a room with a dog.