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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think a little bit of pleasant chit chat at the checkout is okay

44 replies

user1485342611 · 10/02/2018 13:56

I was at the supermarket earlier and an elderly woman was having a bit of chat with the checkout operator. Nothing major, she wasn't just standing there for ten minutes gabbing away. But she was talking as she packed her bags and a couple of times leant over to hear better what the checkout operator was saying to her.

A youngish woman in front of me with a little boy in tow was muttering and glaring and even turned around to me on one occasion and rolled her eyes.

AIBU in thinking there's a happy medium between causing unreasonable delays at the checkout, and expecting everyone to rush through at top speed without exchanging the slightest bit of conversation with the staff?

OP posts:

GetsPostByOwl · 10/02/2018 15:55

DH and I do a big grocery shop monthly. We always make a beeline for the checkout of a certain cashier because we have a nice chat every time. If her till is busy we hold off going to the tills until she is free. She has served us for years and although we don't know her as such, we have a lovely catch up while she rings our stuff up. I hate being served in silence. A nice bit of chit chat is nice. Standing by and taking up the cashier's time and making customers wait is not on but a small conversation I have no issue with.

MrsJayy · 10/02/2018 16:00

This happened to me today woman behind me was tutting because the woman being served was chatting and getting the cashier to help her with her packing she tutted and huffed so loudly a customer service assistant asked if she wanted to use the self scan, I can't stand impatient people.

MrsJayy · 10/02/2018 16:03

Cashiers are told to chat anyway

Bluelady · 10/02/2018 16:15

Nothing wrong with a quick chat at the checkout. I can talk and pack at the same time. What really pisses me off is rude customers who are on their phone throughout the check out process, take ages to pack and don't engage with the checkout staff.

MichaelBendfaster · 10/02/2018 16:18

OP do you live in the south of England, by any chance?!

Yes, because we're all unfriendly in the south.

I live in That London and have some lovely chats with staff in shops.

CantSleepClownsWillEatMe · 10/02/2018 16:19

I find these people who tut and eye roll if they feel they've been "delayed" by 30 seconds laughable. And it is seconds, it might feel like 5 minutes sometimes but I honestly don't believe I've ever witnessed that.

It's understandable that people don't want to spend unnecessary time in Tesco or wherever but it's a supermarket, it's not possible to guarantee you'll be in and out in precisely X number of minutes anyway! Nobody is so busy and important that they simply cannot be a minute or two longer than they had anticipated on the premises.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 10/02/2018 16:23

I think it's quite nice. I'm particularly protective of old ladies (and old men) and never hurry them. I've had a person in front turn around and eye-roll me when an elderly person was counting out change and I just won't collude with that. I can raise one eyebrow on demand so that's what I did.

I don't like the self-service checkouts as I always muck it up so I'm quite happy to wait for people in front and engage in a bit of small talk myself while I'm packing.

BoomBoomsCousin · 10/02/2018 16:36

I would much rather supermarkets focused on efficient than overly friendly. When there isn’t a queue then it’s fine. But I don’t think it’s polite or reasonable to keep everyone waiting while you chat.

MichaelBendfaster · 10/02/2018 16:38

Boom, the OP doesn't sound like the woman was going very slowly or anyone was kept waiting:
she was talking as she packed her bags and a couple of times leant over to hear better what the checkout operator was saying to her.

Wauden · 10/02/2018 16:38

OP, but they say Dublin people are so friendly. I am sure they are. Is it because the shop is in a busy city centre?

One day I will be that lonely lady

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 10/02/2018 16:42

I don't mind the chat, if I'm in a tearing hurry , I'll do self scan.

I know lots of shoppers might only speak to that checkout operator all day , same as at work, I might be the only person they will speak to in a day.

I get more of a rage at the people who leave their shopping I'll just be a minute and wander off to get something else. Here's a fecking novel idea.. get your shopping THEN go to the till

I was behind a woman and her adult son with quite obvious Learning Difficulties He was very slowly and carefully putting things on the belt in such a precise manner . The actions of his Mum, the cashiier and him (and from what I've gleaned over the years on MN) , I waited till he was done and he put the divider down. His Mum thanked me .
The man behind me was an arse, I suggested ArseMan should --fuck off- use another till if he was that bothered

Original poster

user1485342611 · 10/02/2018 16:47

Nope Wauden, it was out in the leafy suburbs. Unfortunately there are a lot of Dublin people who are very busy important people who must not be kept waiting a minute at the checkouts, who must be allowed used the outer lane of the motorway as a 'fast lane' and flash their lights at anyone who uses it to overtake, and who are so exhausted from all their busyness that they cannot be expected to stand up on a bus or train to offer an elderly person a seat.

OP posts:

AwkwardSquad · 10/02/2018 16:53

One day their heads will explode from all the pressure of being so very busy and important. Shame.

NewImprovedNinja · 10/02/2018 16:59

At my local supermarket the cashier doesn't just chat but might go off to find something for the elderly customer and leave the till. If I'm in a hurry to get to school for pick-up, I do feel a bit irritated but on the other hand, I try to remind myself that it's healthier to relax more and not to get stressed by such things.
There are no self service checkouts either.
Oh, and I'm also in rural Ireland rather than a main town/city in the UK.

megletthesecond · 10/02/2018 17:01

Yanbu.

AnnieAnoniMouse · 10/02/2018 17:05

thetallesttree. I’m sorry you’re feeling so lonely. If you’re in the sort of central south east I can always bend your ear over coffee! Else you could try an open invitation on MN. I’ve met quite a few MNers IRL and some while on holiday, it’s been great. It’s hard to make new friends, but you will.

Queenofthedrivensnow · 10/02/2018 17:16

Shockers I would have written exactly the same.

It's true older people are isolated.

Checkout staff are human beings and not robots

EmpressOfJurisfiction · 10/02/2018 17:27

I live in That London and have some lovely chats with staff in shops.

Me too. And with the staff in the coffee shop near my office, who know all their early morning regulars & their orders. And with the bloke who hands me a copy of the Standard in the evenings.

BoomBoomsCousin · 10/02/2018 17:41

MichaelBendfaster

I didn't say there was anything wrong with chatting per se. Just that keeping people waiting is rude. I got the impression from the OP that people were being kept waiting. It would certainly seem to be unreasonable if the process was efficient and people were complaining about something that had no impact.

On a side note, the woman in the queue may not have been tutting at the checkout operator/customer. When I'm in a situation where a few minutes may make all the difference and I express that, it's actually myself I'm normally annoyed at - if things are that tight I probably left the house too late because I spent too long on MN.

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