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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Forgetfull OH

13 replies

TartanDr3ams · 09/02/2018 14:12

So after 3years of tests and illness my DP finally has a diagnosis for a life long illness. He's rather forgetful and although takes his new medication at the right times, is awful at putting in his request for more. His surgery/pharmacy needs 48hours (like most) to process a new medication request. I keep reminding him 4-5 days in advance to put in his request to give him some flexibility when collecting. We had a real bust up last night cause hes a grown man and doesnt want me to keep reminding him. Hes gone to work today without his repeat prescription and will run out of meds on Tuesday - leaving it too late. Hes told me he doesn't want me to interfere with his medication and let him just sort it by himself. If he misses even a single dose hes at risk of illness that affects our family life for well over a week.
AIBU to want to keep reminding him, despite the arguements, to put in his requests or should I be leaving him to make mistakes himself?

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 09/02/2018 14:16

I think you have to let him make his own mistakes. Assuming those mistakes won’t permanently harm him!

Can you make him set a reminder on his phone to order the next batch every X months?

Bubblysqueak · 09/02/2018 14:17

Is he able to do it online? My pharmacy email me a few days before I'm due to order more medication and then it's really easy to just logon to the website and order it (It's the collection from the pharmacy I forget) but don't want it delivers as I pass the shop daily !

glitterbiscuits · 09/02/2018 14:18

No not unreasonable at all

I have a DH whose memory is shocking but he finds me reminding him patronising. It’s a no win situation.

All I can suggest is use a family calendar either paper or electronic where you set up the regular reminders but he actions them

I sometimes remind DH by text so I’m not about to hear the moaning.

FissionChips · 09/02/2018 14:22

He’d probably benefit going to see an occupational therapist.

FissionChips · 09/02/2018 14:23

Sorry, read the post wrong.

G120810 · 09/02/2018 14:27

Tell him as he's forgetting it you will order he collects say u aren't interfering but if he gets I'll it effects everyone xx

Labradoodliedoodoo · 09/02/2018 14:27

I’d let him make his own mistakes and learn from them. If he is ill for a week, you can only give the spare time you hand and nothing more

IHATEPeppaPig · 09/02/2018 14:49

I was awful at remembering to order more meds so the pharmacy said they would do it for me every month and I just have to remember to collect it - which is fine because I know when I've run out.

Most pharmacies do this service now just get your husband to ask.

TartanDr3ams · 09/02/2018 14:53

Thanks for the replies so far. I guess im most reluctant to let him forget because It affects us both when he has an episode. I have to take time off work and such to help care for him. I really thought after 3 years of frustration to finally have answers and working medication that he'd be really eager to get it right. I like the calender idea - i think ill start putting my own prescription dates on there and when hes in a good mood suggest he does that too. He uses a different surgery and pharmacy to me from where he used to live, doesnt make sense to switch yet while hes still new to the illness and under investigation, theyre currently in the process of rolling out the online prescription service which will help drastically - im just fishing for ideas for the current time. Thanks all!

OP posts:
bonzo77 · 09/02/2018 15:01

Pharmacy should be able to handle his repeats for him. Surprised they haven’t offered as it’s a guaranteed income for them.

tiredgranny · 09/02/2018 18:49

Ask dr for batch of prescription that's usually 3 months worth n they will reorder next batch . Boots the chemist are doing text reminders

Most are sent electronically to chemist.
You can also go chemist ask to be ordered

timeisnotaline · 09/02/2018 18:53

If you have to take time off work if he has an episode then he is being very unreasonable. I’d say I’ll remind you until you show me your care plan for getting through an attack without me ( and id add I can’t wait to be able to treat you like a responsible adult and not remind you anymore)

IntelligentYetIndecisive · 09/02/2018 18:53

Once the prescription comes through, he needs to calculate what day it runs out on and schedule a reminder on his phone about a week or so before it runs out.

His life, his health, his responsibility.

Scatty is not 'funny' or 'cute' or 'adorable' in either women or men.

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