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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To give DS his red book for his birthday?

66 replies

TheSecondOfHerName · 08/02/2018 15:21

I'm wondering about giving DS his Personal Child Health Record when he turns 18.

Obviously that wouldn't be his only present.

If IABU, what else am I supposed to do with it? Presumably I'm not expected to hold on to it for ever...

OP posts:
OddBoots · 08/02/2018 15:42

I Whatsapp'd DS a photograph of his immunisation page when he went off to University but it didn't occur to me to give him the book until he leaves home properly.

endofthelinefinally · 08/02/2018 15:43

My adult son died 18 months ago.
I am so glad I kept his clinic book, id bands from his birth, his baptism candle. All them are in a safe place with other mementoes of his life.
Personally I do think these things are important. Not least because none of us know what might happen in the future.
OP I agree that the best time to give it to your son would be when he is a dad for the first time.
I think it is a lovely idea.

Original poster
TheSecondOfHerName · 08/02/2018 15:44

I quite like the idea of waiting and giving it to him if he has a child.

OP posts:
Original poster
TheSecondOfHerName · 08/02/2018 15:45

endofthelinefinally I'm sorry to hear that you lost your son.

OP posts:
eggsandwich · 08/02/2018 15:46

I actually think it’s a great present as I’ve still got both my teenage children’s red books and when they had their jabs and other milestones recorded as well as when my Dd was admitted to hospital with bronchitis at 4 weeks old and my ds’s Audiology results (he was diagnosed with autism at 3) so yes it’s good to give it in addition to a main gift.

I remember my mum writing the date and what jabs we had a scrappy piece of paper which I still have.

Italiangreyhound · 08/02/2018 15:48

@endofthelinefinally I am so sorry for you loss. Thanks

LuxuryMilk · 08/02/2018 15:50

I wouldn’t, but only because I’d be worried it wouldn’t be as cared for the same way I would care for it.
When my mum died it was a lovely surprise to come across all my baby stuff. She’d kept a big chunk of my hair (god knows where she got that from!), my baby record book, a timetable of when she breastfed me and my nappies! She had loads of little things like that, it was lovely.

TroysMammy · 08/02/2018 15:51

There was no red book when I was born 50 years ago but I still have my immunisation card and I keep it updated.

readysteadyteddy · 08/02/2018 15:51

What age do they stop writing in them? DS is three and I don't think we have touched it since his 2+ years check up.

readysteadyteddy · 08/02/2018 15:54

LuxuryMilk I've kept just one page of DS's bfeeding schedule and nappies lol!

I think it's a lovely idea to keep it for when your children have children of their own... although for some the equivalent will be an app by then I suppose.

TwigTheWonderKid · 08/02/2018 15:54

MIL gave us DH's equivalent of a Red Book when I had DS1.

BertieBotts · 08/02/2018 15:57

YY keep it until he has his own child. Or when there's an outbreak of something at university and he needs to know whether he needs a booster vaccination.

Alternatively you could ask your GP for a more compact vaccination record and transfer the information there.

JellySlice · 08/02/2018 15:59

I'm going to put mine in the memories box and give it to my dc when they're expecting their own first dc.

AnElderlyLadyOfMediumHeight · 08/02/2018 16:00

Hang on to it. It may be useful when he has children of his own. Dh's red book equivalent was very reassuring to me when there was muttering about my dd's height/weight. It helped me prove that we're all tiny scraps of things in this family Grin Also there's the vaccinations aspect, in case he wants to travel, for example. Don't give it to him, though - it will probably be lost.

Enidthecat · 08/02/2018 16:02

My mum gave me mine after I had ds. Was quite a lot in it tho and pictures, hospital band etc.

Ihatemarmite123 · 08/02/2018 16:04

I doubt he'll appreciate it. Wait til he's much older. My mum gave me my records recently, although I appreciate them I've looked at them once, they'll stay in a draw forever probably.

Daisymay2 · 08/02/2018 16:08

In all seriousness, hang on to it for a while unless he is super well organised. Immunisations records are important even if nothing else. I worked in a job where the patients's immunisation history was important, and a lot of people did not have a clue.
Also DH had whooping cough when he was in his forties and the Infectious Diseases people asked if there was a copy of his immunisation history anywhere.
My DCs are both over 18 or even 21 - and I have jotted down all immunisations - even the pre -university Meningitis ones and the holiday ones in their books. Both Uni GP practices asked details of immunisations. Neither did a medical related course.

GothMummy · 08/02/2018 16:09

Oh no! I didn't know we were supposed to keep them after they started school....wont vaccination records be electronic at the GPs?

But OP, I wouldn't give one to an 18 year old. It probably means something to you, but he will just loose it!

londonista · 08/02/2018 16:13

I cannot imagine a worse age to be given something with great sentimental value.

londonista · 08/02/2018 16:14

Am lol'ing at the posts about what a shit present this is.

Can you do some photographs or something OP?

Allthewaves · 08/02/2018 16:14

Nah its something u would give if he has own kids

user789653241 · 08/02/2018 16:14

My mum gave me mine when I was pregnant. It was interesting to read all her notes she has written when she was pregnant with me, and all those observation and record of mine.

mirime · 08/02/2018 16:20

I still have DS red book, he's coming up to five. It got covered in olive oil though when he was a baby and is a bit manky so not sure I'll ever be passing it on to him when he's an adult.

ShatnersBassoon · 08/02/2018 16:24

Give it to him if you think it's of any use to him, but not as a present Confused

Surely immunisations are recorded somewhere other than in a book that is easily mislaid. These things are recorded in triplicate, I thought with some purpose.

Merrylegs · 08/02/2018 16:32

I have just today sent a photo to Ds of the immunisation page in his red book. He is 20 and needed it for something at uni. I cannot tell you how many times I have had to fill in date of last jabs on various educational forms for all my kids. V glad I kept the books. I have no record elsewhere. It's not like they're that onerous to store.

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