AIBU to think my gp won't call social services over this?!

[whydothesethingsseemtohappen]

My 5 year old has had trouble with bleeding from her bottom when she goes to the toilet - we have assumed it has been a cut from constipation or something and treated her accordingly for that. She is otherwise healthy other than being a little small.

However, it has been 6-8 weeks now and the last day or two he amount of blood ha been more so that it's not just when she wipes it's actually on her knickers so I have made a doctors appointment tomorrow because I feel like I've done what I can do and would like advice - I thought I was being pretty reasonable.

I mentioned it to my mil today who immediately told me that if I did hat social services would be called and I'd be accused of abuse?! Especially as my daughter is homeschooled.

She is NOT being abused she is with me pretty much all day everyday this is simply not a possibility.

I know I have to take her to the doctor I can't leave her randomly bleeding ffs I'm not sure what my mil would suggest - but I'm having panic attacks now about the whole thing.

I'm not unreasonable to think that my MIL is being over sensitive am I?

We have never had any other kind of problems my daughter has never been injured in any way we have never had social services involved with our family.

IANBU am I?

Your MIL is batshit!! Your dd could be unwell take her to the dd ffs

YANBU! Failing to take her to the GP for sustained rectal bleeding would be neglect, your MIL seems to be placing more value on other people's potential opinions than your DD's health

YANBU she needs medical help it could well be something that will clear up quickly with treatment such as piles. Go to the appointment please your DD needs to see a medical professional- good luck I hope DD is better soon

I won't lie they will ask a LOT of questions. My dd bits bled after a fall and they asked lots of questions and repeated the same questions (obviously to try trip up any lies )

But at the end of the day it's a child's well fare and you have a duty to your dd to get her checked out. Is she constipated? Could she have piles?

Your daughter can't be the first child they've seen who gets constipated and bleeds from her backside. I can't see any reason why the GP would assume there is abuse occurring.

I wouldn't think they'd go to social services. I've done safeguarding training, and the answer is not to ignore but also not go ott either, as there could be an innocent explanation. I'm not a Dr but I imagine he would notice, and perhaps put a little note on the system. So that if you were taking dd to hospital etc all the time (you're not) and presenting abuse systems, that could be the piece to join the puzzle. It's just inter agency working to make sure no child slips the cracks as did in Victoria Climbie's case. It's absolutely not used to penalise parents who have done nothing wrong

My DS had some bleeding years ago, although it was only a couple of times and my gp was excellent. He just examined DS and said it was probably from constipation. Don't listen to MiL!

I am certainly going to take her to the gp - as I say I had thought it was a cut but I don't see how that can have gone on for this long .

how does mil feel about you home schooling? you have nothing to fear at all - just your mil.

Dizzy - I think she thinks I'm total insane 😄 but at the same time she is pretty supportive in general we actually get along pretty well which is why I tend to take notice of what she says! But this has thrown me!

We had the same thing with DS, it was absolutely fine (in his case, was a fissure plus a fungal infection - gross as this sounds, there was v little to be seen externally, which is how it got missed first time) so just needed extra treatment. Ignoring anal bleeding in a child sounds way more likely to get SS involved in my opinion!

No I had to take my dd for something similar although the go asked if anyone had touched her! He didn't report it. Dd is with me 24/7 but like I said wasn't reported. I am sure people love to scare others my mum once said the school would report me to ss for my child wearing odd socks.

Erm. You'd be more at risk of ss getting involved if you didnt take her. (something to do with not seeking medical attention).

Please don't be worried. Your MIL is being silly.

There should be no issue. Does mil think that you should just leave it?!

I home ed too btw!

Who cares if ss is called. Your dd is bleeding. She needs to be seen ASAP.

My money is on an anal fissure my DS had one and my dad used to have them cream helped heal them.

My son has been bleeding very very badly.

Turns out he had an anal fissure.

No one ever mentioned anything about ss.

Took him to a+e as he was starting to bleed a lot and lethargic.

Your daughter can't be the first child they've seen who gets constipated and bleeds from her backside

Definitely not. DS suffers from UTIs and often gets a sore 'winkle' (his word not mine) and sometimes bleeds. We took him to the GPs once and the GP didnt even bat an eye lid. GP "can I have a look?". Took me a minute to work out he actually meant a proper look. Had a look, special cream provided and problem sorted.

Basically OP, remind MIL that bums and other relevant private parts are just another part of the anatomy to medical staff.

Ok thanks She defiantly isn't going to hospital all the time or anything like that - she has only ever been once and that was from falling over at nursery when she was 2 and cutting her head open.

I will take her tomorrow

Take her back. There must be a reason for it and it could be serious. Drs see patients blood from this area every day from piles to bowel problems. Don't listen to your MIL - that's ridiculous. I have two girls who have both had bleeding from the vagina and I've had to take to the GP. (thrush + lots of scratching ect)

I honestly thought you were going to say would ss be called as you had waited 6-8 weeks. Not because of possible abuse! Definately take her.

SS would only be called if there were signs of sexual abuse e.g bruising round the anus sign of damage. Bleeding from the bottom can be for a number of reasons. The GP will look for medical reasons, unless there are other signs of sexual abuse.

Thanks crunchy no there's nothing like that I think I just need to take less notice of MIL

My DS had a bit of constipation when very little and excema in his bottom-which led to pain and bleeding which led to him not wanting to poo.
Vicious cycle-get it nipped in the bud-I'm sure GP is the right thing to do!

Lots of people seem to get worried they will be reported to SS. But GPs are in reality used to dealing with medical issues like bleeding from bottoms. And will be pretty sensible about it.