...for not allowing cereal crmbling/

[readysteadyteddy]

If DH gets up with DS (just turned 3) in the morning, he gives him his weetabix and for some reason allows him to crumble it into the bowl. It goes everywhere, floor, table, hair, clothes, and then it gets tramped through the house from the kitchen. I've asked he doesn't do this, DS is perfectly fine if you just give him the cereal with milk. DH's reply is "Well you feed him then".

So, my choice is I prepare every meal for DS (DH is at work for lunch and DS's dinner) or I have a mess that could be avoided to clean up every day.

I was so angry I crumbled weetabix into his boots and workbag today. Was this unreasonable?

While not the ideal solution, how about a bigger bowl for ds to crumble into, so it catches more of the weetabix ?
@ weetabix in his boots.

*When DH comes home complaining about having weetabix in his socks, you can claim that he must have walked through the trail left by DS that you are no longer sweeping up ever again.

what's not funny?

Ooh hoo hoo, the silly man really will just keep on trivialising and overlooking wimmin's work, won't he? I do drudge work all day for no pay and his benefit, and he comes in and demands to know what I've been doing all day and tee hee hee it's just all so harmlessly funny! Silly little men! How amusing they are, ignoring and overlooking us with so much wuv!

I mean, obviously this is going to go right over your head because you really DO think that's funny, and sadly many other people agree with you. But it's really not.

Blimey poor! You’ve misunderstood the post .....

What the poster found funny and made her giggle was the weetabix in the OP’s dh’s boots!

Get a grip!

Oh, you're right. I misread the emoji and thought it was a laughing face.

I'm very sorry, @MrsMyreton.

newmumwithquestions Re your "if he’s getting up with your DS so you can have a break/lie in.." bit. Wow! It's 2018! It's his son, he parents, same as I do. He doesn't do it "to give me a break"!

I haven't heard that attitude since my FIL told MIL he'd done the washing up for her!!!

@PoorYorick thank you for that. Fear not, all is equal in this household, and I can understand that with lack of context on an internet forum, this may have been misunderstood. If, in future, you feel the need to react quite so... aggressively in offering your opinion, perhaps a more sensitive and less patronising approach may would be more effective.

If your DH doesn't have time to clean up the Weetabixy mess in the morning I guess he'll have to do it when he gets home, won't he? Might need a hammer & chisel by that stage, but there you go...

ZebraOwl That's the thing, it dries like concrete. Plus I'm a "tidy as you go" type. I may compromise (is it a compromise?) and get a cleaner. Not just for the weetabix obvs.

The crumbling is unnecessary. Put weetabix in bowl, add milk and smush it with a spoon . I
Let toddler DGD do this and she gets the required gunky texture she likes and the milk sticks to the weetabix and stops crumbage. Different technique same results no mess. Love the weetabix in boots but agree you will reap the fallout when he takes them off again 😀.

Oooh Moggin, that is it, I'll get a little jug and DS can do the pouring. If the bowl is on a tray it will be less mess if he does spill.

It's snowed here and now it's melting and muddy. Weetabix boots will have to be left outside.

DGD loves helping with any aspect of food preparation so she puts the weetabix in the bowl, helps me pour the milk in (a jug is a great idea. I’d not thought of that and she just helps hold the milk bottle as I pour. She would love to pour it out a jug) then she smushes it up with her spoon then adds some fruit and carries it to the table. The only mess is the transfer of the weetabix from pack to bowl.

YABU for feeding your son weetabix. They are vile.

Eliza Having taken nutritionist Judy More's advice I will continue the Weetabix thanks!

You need to up your weetabix crumbling game. Wherever he sits to relax is always a good one. He can't sit there until he cleans it up......how annoying

readysteadyteddy
I do feel your bix-brick pain. Could you leave it & leave house & pretend to yourself it wasn't there? One go at cleaning up cemented-on cereal should cure your DH anyone, surely?

I got into a recycling-based stand-off with my brother (who lives with me when not working away) a few weeks ago & I cannot tell you how sweet victory felt. Now to get him to empty the fecking food waste bin when he fills it, the manky article...
Clearly the relationship dynamics are vvv different, but there is still that core issue of "Y chromosome is not meant to be short for Yeah, I'm not doing that &/or Y should I take responsibility for anything [that it doesn't suit me to do] " so there needs to be some Manning Up & Cleaning Up of own mess.

Getting a cleaner isn't a compromise (totally understandable, but not a compromise) it's letting him abdicate responsibility for picking up after himself. Whether you clean it up or you pay someone else to, the lesson to your DS is that Men Are Too Busy And Important For That Sort Of Thing & it's up to women to clear up after them. Obviously you're teaching your DS that women do not agree with that & will seek to overturn this tyranny via cereal-based protest; but it is, in all seriousness, one of those insidious bits of patriarchal piffle that contributes to toxic masculinity. Your DH should be able to give his son breakfast without making a mess; should your DH somehow create a huge mess providing a wee boy with some Weetabix, he ought to clean it up. He's not doing this to help you out, he's parenting his own child, so none of his "well if you don't like me deliberately & repeatedly doing a shite job you can do it yourself", nonsense.

Good luck with the milkjug-bowl-smooshing! plan - do you think your DH will actually go for this new delivery system?

Doubtless your DH does have heaps of good qualities & is just being an eejit about the cereal. But my inability to sleep courtesy of multiple [partial] joint dislocations & a lot of reading about women's suffrage campaigners (featuring Much Ire re: erasure of suffragists from narrative, and just what is WRONG with people that they'll mither on about their supposed love for Millicent Fawcett & then call her a suffragette?!) got me to thinking that Actual It Is Not Just Cereal. Hence my ramblings.

Zebra, that sounds painful. Is that a condition or an accident?

You’re right, it’s not just cereal. No deposits were left from socks last night, so I wonder if it had been uncomfortable and he’d tipped out his boots at work?! I did the pouring thing thins morning and DS was fine. Now have to get DH into the habit. Silly thing is, DS is so amenable. He wouldn’t make a fuss if her wasn’t crumbling, so why do it?!

I have, as World-Renowned-Expert-Rheumatologist once put it, Substandard Collagen. Which means (amongst other things) that my joints are a bit prone to wandering off in odd directions. On v little provocation. Ridiculous body is ridiculous, basically. And it is very disruptive for the cats, poor things just trying to sleep & there are suddenly explosive joint-cracks noises right by them &/or the bit of me they were happily snuggled into suddenly becomes a Very Uncomfortable Shape. Their Struggle Is Real.

That really is beyond daft that your DS isn't even fussed about the Weetabix crumbling business. It's as if your DH has decided that's how Weetabix is Meant To Be Done & thus he'll keep doing it that way come hell or hot milk. Maybe he should get Weetiboots every time he gets it wrong? If he doesn't respond to a nice reasoned discussion, I mean. It's a form of aversion therapy, really...

We mix cereals here too. My 2 year old likes to sprinkle cornflakes and bran flakes on her weatabix