AIBU re: reception class progress?

[whatty]

Am worrying a bit about my 5 year old son's progress in reception. I found out at the weekend from another mum that there are child specific targets for all the boys in my DSs class.
After chatting to him a bit at the weekend, it appears that his target is to start his work more quickly. Apparently, he often doesn't get to go out to play as he hasn't finished a task, and he sometimes takes 30mins of a 40min session to get going (the teacher told my mum this at pick up yesterday).
I have made an appointment to speak to the teacher about this primarily to ask why this target was told to me by my DS rather than the teacher. And I am also going to ask how long this has been an issue, what support is being given, and how we need to help him going forward.
My questions are though- is it common for a 5 year old to be slow off the mark re: doing tasks? And how can we change this? And am I worrying unnecessarily? And AIBU to think that the teacher isn't doing a very good job?
If it is relevant- he is at a private prep school and was 5 in October.
Thanks in advance.

I thought reception was about laying the foundations for good learning - one of the key ones is to listen to teacher and do as you're told. So an individual target to try and focus on that doesn't sound terrible, although I personally don't like the punishment element of missing playtime at this age.
By all means have a word but there is a way of approaching this - and if you already have the mentality that the teacher isn't doing a good job I do wonder about how you would have this conversation...

In no school that I have ever worked in would it be appropriate to keep reception class children in at break time, but nor would they be expected to do a piece of independent work that takes 40 minutes independently. However, if this is a private school, DrI assume one of the reasons you chose it is for its academic nature? Were you aware of the nature of the reception class when you chose the school? I would have a word, but if this is the ethos of the school, they may just say they were "pushing" your DD?

Thanks for the comments all- very helpful. I agree, I probably need to chill! My issue may be that I am over thinking the situation and jumping to conclusions before having spoken to the teacher. I just want to make sure DS isn't missing out- in terms of playtime and progression. I'll take on board the valid points you all have raised when I speak to the teacher this afternoon.

Let us know how you get on!

I remember going a few maths lessons in year 2 doing no work. It was because i didn't know how to do the particular type of sums and for some reason didn't like to ask. The teacher noticed I'd done nothing and i asked my mum how to do it and she told me. I guess you need to find out if he doesn't know what he's doing or does know but is getting distracted

The meeting went well (for those who asked/ are interested!). He appears to be finishing last within his ability group (which is the most able group) rather than the whole class. And if he takes ages to finish, he isn't kept from going out to play- it just means that he doesn't get a chance to do the more "fun" elements of the session.

The tricky thing now is that he clearly isn't motivated by the points they award in class (most points in a week=small present e.g. a pencil or rubber) or by beating anyone else. He just appears to be blasé about the whole coming first/ being quick. It means, that he isn't progressing to writing sentences with a connecting word (for example) because it takes him so long to write one sentence. But it isn't through lack of ability... his vocabulary is great and he is reading fluently and appears able to spell words out, form them correctly etc.

Any suggestions from you wise ones?!

Thanks in advance- it's great to have additional views/ experience, because I completely admit to being a bit intense but also clueless about this whole new school thing! 😂

He isn’t competitive, no big deal!

Does he have any special interest?

Be aware that the school may have a culture that you do not agree with, they may be excessively pushy and punitive when targets aren't met and this may not suit your ds, not because you ds isn't able to achieve in the long run, he just might not be ready to do what they want him to do now and that can be quite hard on a kid.
Consider this carefully, it took me 3 years to have the confidence to move my kids out of a hothouse....I do regret my delay.

Have a chat with him and find out what does motivate him. I'm with him on the not needing to be first thing. I don't care either! And didn't at school. I was, and by and large still am, happy to potter along at my own pace. If others want to break their necks trying to achieve something first, fine. Let them! So I have sympathy with him. It hasn't held me back - I've got a Masters! Also, if he's taking care with something I'd rather that, and taking a bit longer, than rushing and making daft mistakes.
If he also isn't motivated by pencils etc (which I would have been) what would attract him? If it's something else that is similar to pencils talk to the teacher and see if you can swap 'his' pencil rewards for the thing he does want. If not, do a swap at home. Or can you agree that he gets stickers from school and that if he gets a certainty number of them you will do someone nice with him at home? Work as a partnership - it won't go on forever. Like toilet training. You offer treats and rewards in the early days but it doesn't mean you are still offering them to fifteen year olds. It just helps to establish the idea of what is expected and get the ball rolling.

Just keep bearing in mind that what he says may not always be exactly what happens. Always double check with the staff of you aren't sure! According to my reception dd, she has been allowed to play naked n the playground, taken back into a burning building to wait quietly while the fire brigade was called (there wasn't a fire), gets smacked regularly (well, not if she's good, only when she's naughty).... Sometimes it's almost plausible. So-and-so was sick on the carpet today. Ok. Why are they at the swimming pool having a swimming lesson with you then?? I like to think of it as a fertile imagination. I think she thinks doing reading is a bit boring so when I ask if anything happened at school she invents stuff! Sometimes it is based on someone that did halogen but she has interpreted it differently (took too long to put her coat on, missed the first minute of playtime, she remembers it as missing playtime. Our teachers are always in the playground at drop off so if I want to query anything I can do it quickly and easily, no fuss. Means I am generally in possession of the facts quite quickly.

To be honest I would not worry at this stage and would actually say it's a strength that he is not overly competitive/racing to finish. I'm a secondary teacher and find this can be counter productive!

he isn't progressing to writing sentences with a connecting word

They don't need to do that in reception. The staff are pushing the children to do more complex work which they are not ready for. If he has met his target, he should be allowed to have choosing time. That will be more beneficial to him because (connecting word) he will be happy and ready for the next learning activity.

All they are doing is turning him off learning. Very bad practice, imo and one that I would not be happy paying for.

Oh it's just kids. They all work at their own pace and by 7-8 they sort of 'get there'. I wouldn't worry. The missing out on playtime though is not good. He needs the release of energy and fresh air/break from the classroom environment. Now that would be the thing upsetting me the most. It's a long day for little kids. They need those breaks.

The missing out on playtime though is not good. He needs the release of energy and fresh air/break from the classroom environment. Now that would be the thing upsetting me the most. It's a long day for little kids. They need those breaks. Absolutely agree with this...poor kid.

OP's update says: he isn't kept from going out to play

As it's eyfs I assume the 'playtime' being talked about is the independent choosing time, rather than the set outdoor whole year group/school playtime.

And the 40 minutes session is the time allocated to do a specific task, though not all children will need the whole of the time and once it's done they go off for their choosing time.

Jesus at five they are getting him to 'read fluently', spell his words correctly and write compound sentences?!?! I'd be a little concerned about this! They definitely shouldn't be doing that in reception class.