What can I do?

[disconnecteddrifter]

Called from work by ex. Said my son (9) had been sick since 5am and he's tried to take him to school today. Obviously school refused to take him in. So he takes him to his wok place, leaves him in reception whilst he teaches. Ds vomits three more times. The receptionist is kind enough to give him some water. Then finishes teaching and brings him home where he vomits three more times. I am unaware of any of this and would have stayed at home if I had known,
I asked ex why he did this and said I was in disbelief as firstly ds is really ill and said he felt he had no choice to stay at home and then secondarily but also important he took a sick child to a school where he is obviously contagious. He responded by shouting so I asked him to stop so ds doesn't have to hear and he continued. I did swear at him and said he was selfish and he just squared up to me trying to out stare me. Reckons he did the right thing and would do it again if our child was sick and he had to work. There is no need - I'd always put ds above work and he is so rarely ill. He's acting like I'm the unreasonable one. And I'm worried about his care for my child. What do I do?

Anyone?

Do you have an official custody agreement? If so, I'd bounce it back to court for that. It's hideous behaviour, to drag a sick and probably contagious child around. The receptionist will have caught it, and no doubt everyone else who passed through reception. What an utter idiot. Let alone your DS being ill and not in bed/comfy. I'd have a massive issue with it, and rightly so.

Oh I'd be raging, not sure legally what can be done though

Surely it would count as neglect?

Why can't he take a day off work to look after his ill child?

Completely out of order. Child should have been in bed not passing around his illness in a school!
His father should have been looking after him, not the poor receptionist.
I would be fuming.

I'd contact his head and see what they have to say about it. Having had three children you get a bollocking if you leave your vomiting child in, all day.

It certainly wasn't in your child's best interest and I'd speak to the safeguarding officer.

That will put a stop to it

I'd be livid

I'm actually surprised he was allowed to sit at reception though

Thank you. That's what I thought and he squared up to me told me to not tell him what to do and anything I say is irrelevant but I can't help thinking how my poor ds would have felt. Ds said receptionist gave him a glass of water and was friendly but he had to clean up to toilet himself. I'm not overreacting? That is neglect? We've been mostly amicable putting the kids first. Ex said his work were fine with it but I can't see how? And that he did the right thing and I'm stupid for saying otherwise. So angry I can't tell if I'm being unreasonable

I'm surprised he was allowed to sit in reception but ds said he sat there whilst ex taught. Then they got a taxi back! I think he took him as he is zero hours contract or whatever; not perm position but would have thought he'd be in more trouble for taking a vomiting child in.

No, YANBU. He is a crap dad. Poor DS, he must have felt awful. When you're ill, you just want to be at home, in bed, snuggling up to a loving parent ie: his mum and not his selfish, uncaring dud of a father.

Thank you for your comments. I am calmer now and still think he was out of order. No point telling him that though and have asked ds to let me know if he needs anything rather than his father.