So, a friend of my oh is married. They have children the same age as ours. His wife and I became friends, saw each other several times a week as only live a few streets away and our children got on really well. We confided in each other about lots of things as friends do and she told me about her other group of friends bullying her out of the friendship group because she had pnd. She told me she was unhappy in her marriage and i confided thatvthings were not good in mine and that my oh was being emotionally abusive and I was at a crossroads. (All ok now though thankfully). She complained how no one seemed to care about her wellbeing until i came along and how unsupported she felt by the friendship group she said abandoned her (after a newcomer arrived and allegedly turned her friends against her) and also by her own oh.
She praised my support of her and said she really valued our friendship. I was extremely supportive of her - and her parents and siblings kept saying how lucky she was to have finally found a good friend that was much needed. I was so happy to have found a friend who also supported me and felt we had a genuinely meaningful friendship. We asked them to be godparents to our youngss so what happened next has really hurt.
So, her eldest started preschool and we still saw each other loads with our other children. Then her eldest was due to start primary school and that summer I was ghosted.
No idea what happened but I was really hurt. She drastically cut down messaging me, left social media and cancelled every time we were due to meet. My husband was as baffled as me so asked his friend.
His friend then said that there was no issue....until pushed then he said this;
My friend didnt like me asking her how she was because she felt I was prying (she had thanked me so often for caring enough to ask how she was as no one else ever bothered so this was a bolt from the blue and I never pushed her to talk, I just gave an ear if she wanted one)
My friend didn’t like me saying negative things about my oh (she spends no tim with my oh and has no relationship with him. I had only confided in our problem at that time because she had opened up about her own marriage being unhappy and I didn’t want her to feel alone!)
So, I was told not to say anything incase it brought her pnd back (?)
I tried several times to meet, to message and just got passive aggressive ‘love to meet but can’t as sooo busy’ until I gave up.
How can a person change like that?
I feel like I was used until her eldest started school and now her attention is on the school mums....
It really hurts and makes me question whether she was bullied by her old friends or whether she simply did the same thing to them!