To think...

[GlitterUnicornsAndAllThatJazz]

...When someone says they call a spade a spade/say what they think/don't mince their words/any variation on this, 9 times out of 10 they are a twat?

Someone told me today I am very black and white - would this be classed as similar to the op? For the record I am def not a twat!!

Yep. Twat. Like people who "say what they're thinking because they're not two-faced". It's not two faced to not immediately blurt out what ever cruel remark was passing through your head at any given moment.

Alot of times yes but not always. But yeah, it's like the "no offense but" "I don't mean to be rude but" lines

Yanbu. Its like men who start off with 'what it is, is' and then complain when you treat them like a chancer.

Absolutely. Someone I know does it, "I tell it like it is, me...", cue twattish comment.

Agree.

'I just say it as it is' = I'm a rude fucker.

'I'm like like marmite, you either love me or hate me'

Pretty much guarantee I will be in the 'hate' camp

Not necessarily. I would say I call a spade a spade, but I would never deliberately hurt anyone's feelings.

They are in the same bracket as those who say when you meet them...
oh I'll never remember that, I'm rubbish with names.
Twats

And I hate - I don't mean to be rude but.........................

It depends on the context. If someone is struggling to express something ‘delicately’ to avoid offending me instead of being to the point I might tell them to call a spade a spade and just spit it out.

@Mrsdraper1 - I really, really struggle with names and faces. I have had people tell me there name when I'm paying 100% attention and within 20 seconds I've forgotten it.

I’m bad with names too, but good at remembering people if you see what I mean. I would never say ‘oh I won’t remember that’ when introduced the first time but I’ve found it best to be upfront when I meet them again and just say ‘I’m sorry, I can’t remember your name’ and let them tell me again.

Not necessarily.
Recently my colleague (who originally hails from Yorkshire) told me she counted me as an 'honary Northerner' due to the fact that sometimes at Team meetings I translate all the nonsense strategy speak into English, for clarity for everyone.
Sometime they report back from high level meetings and it's like watching WA1 - which is fine as a comedy half hour, but a complete nonsense in a work environment where we are all understaffed and just need things to be clearly spelled out.
I was very proud

Just don't tell people you are rubbish with names in a tone, then it'll be fine.
There's loads of times I have forgotten names and as I get older it gets worse but.....you can bluff it if you've forgotten and there's no need to say it!

It just sounds like you can't be bothered to even hear what the name is

I hate the phrase. I know I'm pretty direct but I don't advertise it that way. It's not something to be somehow extremely proud of or anything, just the way you are.
I would admit that I may not come across as the nicest person in the world sometimes but I'm not rude or cruel for the sake of it and am capable of telling a white lie when needed.

I agree. It's like they're making a virtue of meanness and/or rudeness.

"I speak as I find" "Oh I've just got no filter me" - No, you're just bloody rude.

I think the worse people are the ones that cant take it in return and accuse you of being rude

I prefer people to call a spade a spade!

Why is it rude?

Oh my god I couldn't agree with you more!!
I absolutely hate people who seem to think that can say whatever they like because they preface it with 'I say it like I see it' or similar.
They are dicks.

MrsDraper - I have diagnosed short term memory problems and usually tell people that I have terrible trouble remembering names/I might need to ask them to remind me. Nobody seems to take offence!

It’s usually the people who announce “I call a spade a spade, me” about themselves who turn out to be twats. I have no problem with honesty, but the people who announce their lack of filter often seem to think the pre-warning gives them free reign to act like complete dickwaffles.

My MIL always says "I'm entitled to my opinion", the only reply to which is "I didn't ask for it" and breathe.

Funnily I can usually remember children's names, I just struggle with adults. There's no real reason for it either. I repeat a name about 20 times in my head but it doesn't help. And if I see people out of context it's a nightmare because I can't remember where I know them from to have any hope of remembering their name.

It’s quite possible to be direct and polite.

Interestingly people who say that they “speak as they find” are often much less happy to be told that I find them rude and unpleasant.

YANBU someone I know delights in saying 'I don't miss and hit the wall' She sees it as a bage of honour to be loud and sour about everything. Yet when asked one to one about something the 'I say what I want attitude disappears in a flash.

I think it's old bullying tactics and it's bullshit. Like pp said, you can be direct and kind.