To have found myself feeling a little bit sorry for this man, as well? (CW poss DV)

[ReanimatedSGB]

Ghastly business all round (though I'm not sorry I waded in, can't see what else I should have done.)
I was out shopping, heard yells, saw a couple having a fight over a toddler in a pushchair, so dived over to see what was going on. He was trying to take the toddler away, the mother was screaming at him to leave them alone, two or three bystanders were yelling that the police were on their way. I asked him to calm down and let go of the buggy. He told me what to do with myself (unsurprisingly) but I stayed put and told him he was scaring the kid, and that people weren't going to look away while a grown man shouted at a woman and child. The couple carried on yelling - I said to her I would stay till the police arrived. In the course of the row (he did calm down a bit) he was telling her he loved her and wanted her to get help - in between calling her names - and she was pleading with him not to take the kid.
I got the impression she might have a drink/drug problem - mainly because he didn't come across as clever enough to be making all that up just to discredit her.
The police came along in the end and spoke to them both and I cleared off. I'm mostly sorry for the kid. What a fucking mess. Feel a bit wobbly.

Sounds like a right mess. Who could possibly know the truth of the matter from such a snapshot?

Hopefully the family(?) get the support needed to address the problems they face.

I dunno sounds a lot like the arguments my ex and I would have (but behind closed doors) where he’d tell me he loved between calling me a slag, a mental bitch, telling me to do everyone a favour and kill myself and accusing me of using drugs (anti depressants that are prescribed to me) and he only threatens to take our kids away from me because he loves me.

I’m not saying this guy was like my nightmare of an ex but I wouldn’t be in a hurry to feel sympathy for anyone who’s reduced the mother of their child to a sobbing screaming mess. Feel sorry for the poor baby though.

I wasn't so sorry for him that I was going to let him take the kid, of course. And I know perfectly well that abusive men often paint their exes as 'mad bitches'. It was really just a horrible mess and I hope they get help all round.

I'm a druggie/alcoholic/Have mental health issues/ sleep with millions of people while my kids are in the house/general terrible parent too.

I am always very wary of anyone who says those things about their ex.

The child is the one who I feel sorry for in that situation.

I would not feel sorry for anyone acting.like that in front of a child.

My relative is an expert in DV (trains all over the country). It is well known that perpetrators often paint their partners/exes as alcoholics etc. Also, the abuse itself can tip people into those behaviours. You don't really need to be 'clever' to think of this - most perps she has dealt with would not be considered 'clever' but often use this.

Having said that I agree with other posters that it is impossible to really know what was going on with either party from that tiny exchange. I feel mostly sorry for the child.