To want a diagnosis after a really hard year

[dimondjedi9]

My little guy has his ASD assessment today, am I being a bad mum by wanting a diagnosis either way? We've lost so much sleep over the way he is.
He's 10 and rarely attends school now, he gets really anxious in crowds now and cry's at the most tiniest thing. He is such a loving boy but can change into this aggressive monster, throwing things and hitting me.
We have received his draft EHCP but they haven't included the ed psych report and school are really unhappy with it.
This past year has been horrendous, I'm praying today is going to be the start of the light at the end of the tunnel. My auntie said that we are wrong to try and label him and even accused us of pushing for it so we can get money for him, needless to say I won't be speaking to her or my mother any more, how silly of me to expect support from them!
I just want him to be happy and thrive and I know and so do the school that he will not cope in mainstream.
Sorry for the long post, I just needed to let off some steam!

Good luck OP, i hope you get the answers you need today

Good luck - and your Aunt is so wrong!
Admittedly diagnosis isn't a magic wand, and you may well be left with a bit of paper and a leaflet about parenting classes (and thinking what now). But it does help to have have the diagnosis. It's a way of starting conversations about needs, and for you telling yourself to accept he is as he is, and a word or phrase to start Google searches when hunting for strategies to help.
[flower]

Very much NOT being unreasonable. DD1 has an ASD diagnosis and knowing this helps. It really does. It's not a label it's a diagnosis. Nobody is 'labelled' when they get a diagnosis of diabetes, epilepsy or asthma for example. It's a condition and once it's formal people are, for the most part, more accepting. My DS obvious has ASD but because he's high functioning he missed a diagnosis by one point. So I'm having him reassessed. Otherwise at senior school he will be labelled. As a troublemaker with anger issues. So no you are being proactive and doing the best for your child. Ignore those who say differently.

Thank you for taking the time to respond, it all went well we just have to wait for the assessor to do her report and then the doctor will arrange to see us.
He is going to be receiving weekly psychotherapy appointments with camhs.
Let's hope that there is light at the end of this very long tunnel.