to ask DH to help with 5week old baby at night

[cookingachristmasturkey]

We have a 5 week old baby, our second DS so we arnt completely new to this. DS2 seems to have some real wind issues, don't know exactly what is causing (we are trying everything to resolve, infacol, colief, lots of upright carrying, tummy massage etc.... He is ebf).

But due to his wind, night feeding isn't easy. It has taken ab hour and a half both at 11:30 and 3:30 (I'm still trying) to get him fed, winded, settled and off to sleep. And even then his sleep can be fitful as he has wind pain and grunts/ farts etc.

I have just asked DH to help take over getting DS back to sleep, as he is awake so long i cant just feed back to sleep easily.

His response was 'if i have too'.... How supportive! So far I've had three and a half hours sleep, our DS1 (3 yrs old) will be up at 6:30 and i will have the two boys for the day, so jo chance of catching up on sleep!

This isn't the first night....

Yes DH works full time, but AIBU to ask for some help in a situation like this?

Firstly, you have my sympathy. Our DS was like this for the first 6/8 weeks or so - luckily it has now calmed down (he is 13 weeks - just finished his second feed of the night myself which is why I am awake too )
And secondly, no YANBU - DH has to parent too!! One thing that gets me through is I know that DHs alarm will be going off in an hour and he will take DS from me for a couple of hours while he gets ready for work and I will sleep! You have to work together on this for your sanity and because he is a parent too!

You both work full time. Him out of the house and you with the kids at home. You need to work together to get through this.

Can you go to bed earlier and try to get a block of sleep day from 8-midnight? Or could he get up earlier and have the baby from 4:30?

Unless he is in a job that it would be dangerous to be tired then he should be sharing the nights with you. Even if it's just a couple of nights a week.

Can someone come and look after one of both dc for a couple of hours during the day so you can rest and catch up on a bit of sleep.

If he genuinely can't function on less sleep then he needs to contribute at weekends. Take both dc while you get a lie in.

When my second DC turned 1 and I in the second trimester with our 3rd DC my husband turned around and said that if I ever need a night off he would take her - my first DC is 4 and this was the first time he had ever offered...I know full well this came because he had been talking to colleagues and realised they were sharing the nights with partners, my years of asking had not made one iota of a difference, he helped but like you I got the ‘if you want me to’ or ‘if I must’. I resisted the urge to make a husband shaped dent in our frying pan and I am only on call for DC’s a couple of nights a week whilst I finish growing our 3rd DC. So all I can suggest is getting him to talk to others as in my house what I say is in one ear but if someone at work says it then it sticks! 😡

So all I can suggest is getting him to talk to others as in my house what I say is in one ear but if someone at work says it then it sticks! 😡

I hear that!!!!