I need to vent about my MIL. She may live a 100 miles away in aussie but she's so cunning. We don't have a great relationship as she spent a lot of her time ignoring me the last time I visited, it was point blank blanking for 3 weeks out of the 4. I could discipline my children coz it made her upset that I was overriding her authority to say yes to everything. She never spoke to me unless DH made her and if I did speak in her presence, boy she was hot on my tail to dismiss my comments. I wasn't allowed to go to the local shop or cinema with DH as she made excuses for us not to go. She was super upset that DH had made plans with me to go away for one night to the point it looked like she cried. She made all our daily plans by consulting DH and my children and I even got told that I'm I shouldn't drink cola coz it's bad for me...Ffs! Eventually I just stayed to myself and spoke when I was spoken to my DH, FiL and kids to protect myself from conflict and getting the blame later on for no reason. Ended up by the end of the trip the FiL and MiL having a ago at me. DH joined in too.
I defended myself as much as I could. FIL eventually told me that last time someone treated him badly when he was a young adult (him Coming from a religious point of view) that God punished them and they died of cancer recently. The came the blackmail that if I didn't revisit them, then everyone on their side of the family would call me a bad seed. MiL was too busy shedding fake tears and telling me I have a problem with her. That I don't clean her house or help her in the house cooking, I take so long ironing and I'm so ristrictive towards my children(telling them. Not to use the I pad is a bad thing apparently and so is telling them not to eat too much junk) and my ironing takes too long and took everything I did in a civil manner and made me look bad.
I've made an effort with her after the last disaster holiday but she didn't reciprocate and blanked my msgs again for almost a year may be 2. Now she makes an effort after DH spoke to her but eh is is her effort "hi how are you and how are the kids. How's the cheeky little monster. Give them both our love" this is my reply. "hi I'm good thank you. How are you both doing?Kids are good, one at school and the other is at nursery" She won't every reply back or make any other effort for a conversation. She's pleasing my husband is the most cunning ways. She tells him she txt me, he's happy. She won't tell him she doesn't reply coz that will make.Him Unhappy.
DH said I should say hi to him mum via Skype. I told him I'm still hurt by the abuse I got from his family so I'd rather keep to text. He turned around and said I'm holding a grudge. Then came the argument. I told him I'm Still very hurt and that I put in enough effort after we came back that wasn't shown back so I don't see why he's pushing me so much when it shows that the next person isn't bothered.
The DH is going to see her for 3 weeks tomorrow. MiL called and asked for him for kids clothing size.. Like he would know(!) I told him well you keep Banging on about effort so may be she should have called me and asked me. He went on to make excuses like. It came up in convo etc etc. I'm like ok but she can call and ask me. He's to stupid to understand that point coz it shows how cunning his mother really is.
Im venting like I never have before. I always try to keep calm and make him how hurt I am and all he does defend her and tell me that he can see all sides of the story. Well if you could you could have effing seen this one coming and said mother dearest call the wife and ask her coz I'm clueless. Idiot!