To feel a bit resentful...

[procrastinationsupremo]

I am a paediatric HCP. I qualified about 10 years ago and have 2 degrees as well as some additional specialist post-graduate training. I currently work for a small community enterprise, but also worked for the NHS for several years. I earn about £20,000 for what is supposed to be 3 days a week work but is always at least 4 and often more. I know that I am lucky to earn an above average wage and I do enjoy the time I actually spend working with children and families. However, I find I am feeling increasingly resentful about the incredibly stressful nature of my work, the emails/phone calls etc. all day every day, no work/life balance etc. etc. Reading posts on here it seems like so many people have 9-5 jobs, earn hugely more than I do and have stuff like (and I know this seems pathetic) 'lunch hours' and staff rooms etc. etc. I'm lucky if I get time to shovel down a sandwich in my car (I generally don't). I feel unappreciated and exhausted, Aibu to feel jealous and sorry for myself?

YANBU. It's not the same but I gave up teaching for the same reason - I wanted to leave the office at 5 (ish!) and be able to take a lunch break etc etc. I suspect you might get comments saying that most 9-5s aren't actually 9-5 any more and that is true but I think the pressure of a job like yours, combined with the hours, is something entirely different.

If it helps at all, I value you what you do and I'm really grateful for your contribution.

I've no knowledge of your field, but is it possible to talk to your boss about working your contracted hours only, with overtime agreed and paid?

YABU at all. The wages we pay our HCPs is awful. I just hope enough of your patients and their parents make you feel appreciated because the work you do is amazing.
That said, I’m currently thinking of taking a pay cut to train as a nurse because I’m desperate to do something that I feel is worthwhile. I hate my 9-5 office job!x

I wouldn't believe everything you read on here OP. Some posters come out with some outlandish shit. The funny thing is that some people believe it.

People make stuff up on the internet something chronic! They exaggerate their wealth, They make out they have an amazing high-flying career, and they make out they are on much higher pay than they are. Some also make out they are much better educated than they are.

In reality, most people on here are no better off than you, and many are stay at home mums masquerading as professionals with great salaries and fancy mansions. and huge inheritances.

Stop believing their shit and you will feel better about yourself.

Not sure if this is possible for you, in my role as a hcp with vulnerable families and seniors; no cell during scheduled time off, automatic msg to present to emerg dept if any concerns. I scheduled and took my lunch break. Logged extra time in a notebook and took flex time off in exchange for additional time put in.

Wow thanks everyone, I thought I'd get a lot of people telling me to grow up and feel grateful for what I've got (which would be fair enough) but these messages have really made me feel better already! Some good advice too, I'm sure there must be some strategies I could use to improve my work life balance at least! I just find if I don't answer emails when they come in (even at 11pm on a Sunday) I can't possibly get through them all during work hours and get really stressed out and anxious... I don't want to give up, not least because I worked so bloody hard to get here!

I feel your pain. I’m a teacher and I’m supposed to do 13 hours a week and do at least double that for no extra money. I think people forget that when you’re part time expecting you to work extra days is like asking a full timer to work during the weekend, etc.
You have to draw a line somewhere. I do not check my work email over the weekend, ever, and I have started to say no more often at work, but it’s so hard!

I stopped thinking about whether or not my full-time colleagues were working beyond their contracted hours, but instead reminded myself that they were being paid for 5 days and I was not. That made it far more easy for me to justify to myself not answering calls on my days off, or finishing off bits of urgent work, etc.

Would you be better going ft and earning more than wotkjng extra unpaid?

No you are most definitely not BU. I don't have any answers or suggestions. And I'm not sure it's of much use to you to know that the vast majority of people will have huge admiration and respect for you.

Yeah I think part-timers do generally get a rougher deal. I probably could go full-time and get paid for more of the hours that I do, but I have a 2 year old daughter and I really want to have as much time with her as I can while I have the chance.. Plus paying for more childcare... I think it's such a shame (and rather ironic) that jobs like mine and teaching are so difficult for people with families. I'm lucky that we pay a good friend to look after my daughter so if she's a bit poorly etc. it's not a problem. If I had to have a day off every time she was ill there is no way I'd be able to stay in my current role....

Speak to your manager and stick to your scheduled time. Find out who covers when your not available and email those involved. “Please contact XYZ during the following times”.

Twitter it is actually so lovely and of great help to hear that. Thank you

Unfortunately OP the reality of our society is that the jobs which most help people (NHS staff, carers, charity workers, teachers, firemen etc..) are significantly lower paid than others. It is crap and unfair and i can’t help but feel angry when I see hedge fund types making thousands a day etc.

I’m not really sure what the answer is but if it helps, what you are your colleagues do is incredibly valuable and appreciated. Some people go to work and churn out their shifts, and life keeps on going, but you are making a real difference in the world and are helping people. The world is a slightly better place because of the job you do.

I know that won’t put food on the table or pay the gas bill, but I hope it helps 🌷

You should most definitely be getting paid for your extra hours! And should not have to do them if you don't want to...

I work full time, never do less than 45 hours a week in the office and work more from home ..... but I get paid for every single one of them. I'm on an hourly rate from when I was part time, and have point blank refused to be salaried unless my boss will meet what I earn now.

It’s one thing to be available in case of emergencies it’s another to be taken advantage of. Set your boundaries.

Sadly I don't think that would work in my case Christmas, we're a very small multi-disciplinary team and I am the most senior in my particular discipline. There is definitely no one else to answer my emails! It just seems to be the accepted culture, the whole team is the same. I actually had a much more 'boundaried' work life when I worked for the NHS, but that was very difficult in different ways...

Who covers for you when you go on holidays?

Sorry Christmas, crossed post. I fear I'm going to be one of those people who rejects all solutions as 'not possible' and basically just wants to have a whine and hear that I'm not alone!

Not wanting to harp but for your own long term sanity and health you need to find something that works.

No one covers. I just don't book any appointments etc. and if I don't deal with them while I'm holiday all my emails, phone calls, paperwork etc etc are waiting for me when I get back!

You're right Christmas and I really appreciate your suggestions. I'm sure I could be better at setting some boundaries, but as others have said it's so tricky and I think a lot of people just end up leaving the profession altogether.

YANBU, healthcare professionals definitely have the rough end of things.

If it helps with perspective, some people only manage the 9-5 thing because we have work that we can take home with us, or because our workloads fluctuate (some weeks it's lunch breaks and finishing on time, some weeks you're glad you had some 'emergency' packs of dried porridge in your desk drawer) and the contracts don't have a set number of hours on them, they just say something like 'work the appropriate number of hours to fulfil the requirements of the role' Comparison is the thief of joy!

Oh, yeah, and some people on here are definitely talking out of the wrong hole when it comes to their work life balance among other things

Okay same with me. And those that sign your pay are fine with this.