To not want to go to NY?

[SwanVests]

Nc’d for this.

Next weekend dh and I are supposed to be going to NYC. We’re going out for a posh meal with his work on Saturday, then Sunday exploring. He has to work Monday then we’re flying back overnight. It’s all booked and paid for through his work.

I’ve never been to nyc and always wanted to go. I’ve also never spent more than one night away from my dc (and that was only once). They’re 5 and 22 months. 5 year old is going through a very clingy stage and 22 month old ends up in our bed most nights. My dm will be looking after them, she is great with them, they love her to pieces and she’ll happily have them in her bed if they get upset at night.

But it’s 3 nights. I can’t sleep now because I’m worrying about it. I don’t want to leave them and I know I won’t enjoy it. Dh and I are going through a bit of a rough patch and I’m not really looking forward to spending time with just him. And if I do get upset and am not suitably enjoying myself he’ll get stroppy and it’ll be even worse.

I know I’m being a brat but I just want to stay at home with dc’s and I know I can’t. Talk some sense into me please.

Once you're at the airport you'll feel better.
You're going anyway so you may as well enjoy it. Dc are in good hands and will be fine.

Have a blast

GO! It's extremely important to link up as adults and not just parents. It will be for the best. The kids will be perfectly fine.

I am sooooooo envious

I went last year and have been desperate to go back ever since.

9/11 memorial museum is a must
Ellen's stardust diner
Shopping
Highline

Oh I'd love to go again, not enough time in 4 days for us

I tend to forget my other dcs when I get to the airport and no one is fighting or needs a wee

I was you back in September. I went home to California and it was a tonic for the soul. Yes, I was anxious leaving the kids but a long weekend in New York is a blink-and-you'll-miss-it experience you should take up! It'll be too fast. The kids will be fine!

Go! We left DD to go to New York (she was 2), and it was brilliant. I even enjoyed the flight because I got to read a book in peace and watch a whole film! We were so busy I didn't really miss her too much (it might have been different if it were a lazy, beach style holiday). Also, I thought that if there were any problems we could actually be home relatively quickly as flights are so frequent.

Thank you for all the reassurance. I know I’m being daft. I think some of it is that dc’s are now getting past the point of being entirely reliant on me and I’m feeling a bit redundant l. The other part is that dh has been such a complete twat recently that I don’t want to have a lovey dovey weekend with him.

I know I’m being a spoilt brat and I’m sure I’ll have a lovely time once I’m there.

Go! I have a 5 year old and 22 month old and have left them for longer and travelled further.

I wouldn't have been able to leave my youngest at 22 months. But she was still feeding. I would have had to take her with me!

A paid for trip to NYC? GO!!!
I love New York. Would go back tomorrow if I could!

Go! You’ll soon forget about thingy and whatahisname when you see how amazing it is.

And take your thermals!

Go!
Your children will be absolutely fine with your Mum. It's great for them to get used to other loving adults caring for them. Emotionally healthy.
Do you think a bit of time away with you OH might help OP? Family life with young children can be so stressful.

It will fly in and you are gone such a short time that dc will be very well entertained by DM and you aren't gone long enough for them to really miss you. Tell them you will bring them somethingvreally nice back and explain how long you are gone in terms of sleeps and all the fun things dm is going to do in your absence.

I feel you OP though. I feel the same leaving Dd (19) and my dog! I can't explain things to the dog!

I was there recently for work, and even at minus twenty-eight and having flown into the ‘cyclone bomb’ blizzards en route, and having had to land in Washington, I had an absolute ball in my free time. You should definitely go. It doesn’t need to be forced loveydoveyness, either. Figure out what you want to do and do it. NY is a wonderful city.

Can I go instead of you?
We went in October and it is the best place I've ever been. I'm trying to save so I can go again.
Your mum will be fine and remember that she's practiced on you first! It'll be good to have time with your dh. Also a baby won't have fun on this holiday.
Jealous!

Go. You have always wanted to go. Your DCs will be fine.

God. I'm so jealous. I've wanted Togo back to NYC for years.
I'm surprised you are that worried. Sincerely, what's the worst that could happen?

I have an anxiety condition, including about travel and leaving the DC, and have also experienced relationship problems. At many times I would have found a trip like this really difficult. can understand your concerns.

The DC will be fine. Important IMO to do things without them sometimes. Never doing so isn’t great for any of the family.

The relationship problems and DH behaving like a twat sound a big issue. Next steps to be considered carefully, eg couples counselling or you could seek help just for yourself.
The weekend isn’t the time for that though.

The worst that could happen? Major disasters aside, OP’s DH could behave like an arse to her, as she reports he has been at home, and she could feel pressure to say nothing and act cheerful in fear of his reaction, ans miserable about her relationship and situation the whole trip.

Been there done that!