Neighbours complaining. AIBU?

[MamaMiaReboot]

I’ve recently had new neighbours move in who seemed nice enough when I met them, if a bit strident.

But, they complain a LOT.

Yesterday it was that I put bottles “noisily” in the recycling bin at 7pm. (If anyone knows how to drop glass containers silently into a deep plastic bin I’d love to know! )

Today it was that my washing machine is too loud. And that I shouldn’t do my laundry on a Sunday.

I politely but firmly told them that I could hear their teenage son shouting when he watches football very loudly but that it was all part and parcel of living in a maisonette.

But, I’m wondering if I am BU about the laundry bit on a Sunday afternoon. Is there some neighbourly etiquette about that that I’m not aware of?

I wouldn't do my laundry before 9 or 10am on a Sunday when I have neighbours, but they are unreasonable if they expect you not to do any at all. Unless they are foreign and don't understand that it's a perfectly acceptable thing to do here! I would still do it.

I do try to be quiet with the bins because of the neighbours, but even with young children, 7pm is perfectly reasonable too. (9pm wouldn't be!)

The problem with people complaining stupidly is that you end up ignoring their valid queries. They are BU.

And let me guess - did they move to get away from "unreasonable neighbours" by any chance? DH and I have always lived in flats and prided ourselves on being good neighbours. This means making reasonable adjustments where necessary with the clue being in the reasonable. So, our milkman comes really early (three in the morning) and slams the gate every time. Didn't wake us because we sleep at the back, but woke our downstairs neighbour. They didn't complain but it came up in conversation so now when we put the empties out we also prop the front gate open . End of problem.

Your people aren't being reasonable at all.

You have a milkman?!

Where do you live? I miss having milk delivered! Oh those were the good days!

Ignore, ignore, ignore!

Are they Free Church of Scotland?

Ha! I was just about to ask if they'd moved there from the Hebrides!

Are they Free Church of Scotland?
Were the empties ALCOHOL??!!

Your mistake was engaging the first time they complained. You have to roll your eyes and ignore them now. It’s the only way to deal with it.

@BreakfastAtSquiffanys

At least 50 percent

I would just laugh at them and tell them they were hilarious.

Carry on. They're clearly batshit.

Check on 'milk and more' to see if there's a milkman in your area @MamaMiaReboot.
We have our milk delivered, lush non-homogenised with all the cream on the top.

My grandmother would think it's shameful to do the laundry on a Sunday, and even my mum has complained about people hanging washing out on Sundays, but I think that's a very old fashioned view.

I remember our neighbour saying, not sure whether he was complaining, that dh had woken up his wife from an afternoon nap when he started his motorbike.

I didn't have much sympathy since they always have visitors who leave very late, shouting and laughing and slamming car doors.
We don't say anything, live and let live, but if I want to put my recycling out late then I do it without a qualm.

If your washing machine is shuddering it's probably not levelled properly. Try adjusting the feet.

I think the Sunday thing is from years ago when you were not supposed to do it or hang it in the garden. Possibly when people stayed at home all day not going off to work early.

When I lived in a flat before we moved I would avoid using the washing machine early or late, 2am in a flat is not fair to others.

mamamia I have a milkman who delivers milk in glass bottles AND a windowcleaner. I feel like a properly paid up 1950s adult now :-)

There's a site called something like FInd me a milkman that tells you who (if anyone ) delivers in your area

Result! They deliver to my area! 😃

For finding that out alone I’m glad I started this thread. Thank you all!

Nonevernotever I read that to mean your milkman delivered the window cleaner...
No, OP, you are not being unreasonable in putting out the empties at 7 pm, not washing on a Sunday afternoon.

Are you upstairs? Is it possible (as a concession) to put a mat under the washing machine to absorb some of the noise?

Ignore them. They are cunts. There is nothing wrong with doing your washing during the daytime, or taking your recycling out at 7pm.

Politely request that they do your washing instead

They're not from continental Europe are they? It's pretty standard to not make much noise or do things like mowing the lawn or washing the car, particularly in Germany where there are laws around it. It'd be great if we could do the same here but that's not how it is so YANBU.

Ignore. My HA tenancy states 10.30pm to 7am as 'quiet' times. As 40 odd flats manage to adhere to that reasonable request I think you new neighbours are a pain in the arse.

@balsamicbarbara

As far as I can tell, they are British.

I am going to ignore their complaints.
I think if I keep saying no, that is not a reasonable request and point out that I am adhering to sociable hours there’s not a lot they can do.

They, especially the man, are very pushy though not exactly rude. I get the feeling they’re quite entitled and used to getting their own way through intimidation. Not exactly aggressively but through the fact that they are clearly a lot more well off than me and the other neighbours.

Anyhoo, thanks all for the advice here.

You definitely have to make your boundaries clear otherwise they will try and bully you for years. Good luck!

Where have they moved from? The 1950s??
In an era when it is commonplace for a couple both to go out to work, most families need to do housework, including laundry, on a Sunday.