Alcohol at teen party.

[youarenotkiddingme]

I'm not judging - just really trying to find out if I'm really out of touch and what's likely to be going on in my ds life and around him!

Year 9 birthday party last night. Children arriving with a few bottles of alcopops.
Not sure if host Mum had bought any - but know she pretty much does as her child asks and her child had one in hand in photo I was sent.

I know drinking in home is fine so I'm not worried about that side of it.

I'm just wondering if that's the norm these days? That if my 13yo and year 9 ds went to an evening gathering/party at a friends that alcohol will be considered part of the norm?

9 yrs ago when my eldest was 14 he had a bbq for his birthday and we bought them a few 3 % little bottles of European lager. I thought that was pretty relaxed! My youngest is 13 and I can’t imagine doing the same as his friendship group seems much “straighter” and I know some of the parents wouldn’t like it. I think 13 is way to young for alcopops.

Its year 9 so birthday party for 14yo iyswim?

Too young. Parties with alcohol only really started in yr 11 for ds1. Ds2 is 15, yr - 10 and to my knowledge those kinds of parties haven't started yet in his peer group.

Have 3 DC- all older than that now and that is far too young.

Think they started pushing the boundaries at 15/16.

I think even they would think that is too young!

My one dc is in year 9 and this isn't a thing yet....

My older dc started having a small amount of alcohol at house parties in Year 11. He is very sensible and doesn't like to be out of control, so he gets 'merry'. Now in Year 12, he went to a party last night and many kids were wrecked, being sick etc.

Lots of his peer group where we live are into cocaine and mdma.

In my view you don't give other people's underage children any alcohol without checking with the parents first, even if it's in your own home. I've fallen out with a couple of parents over this but most I've discussed it with seem to think it's a reasonable rule of thumb.

Stopping them from getting hold of booze and bringing it to a party is harder - I believe that an adult host (parent) has a duty of care and should try to prevent it.

Why do some people think you need alcohol at every social gathering?

YANBU OP.

My DS is year 8 and I can't imagine him drinking next year, or going to parties tbh.

My friend has a son in year 9 though who is in with the 'cool' kids (one of them told my DS not to even talk to her as he's not on her level!) and she's spitting that other parents are buying alcohol for parties.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who seemed to think this was too young!

Tbh the parents of guests must be ok with it to send the drink.

I asked because my own ds has asd and so isn't into the whole social scene yet. However recently he's began to mix with his peers so thought I'd judge what may come up next!

Although he swears blind he's NEVER drinking alcohol ever - so I don't think he'd be asking for any or even try it (he won't when my DB offers him a taste of beer at xmas etc!)

Year 11/12 is when I remember starting to have 2ltr bottles of white lightening appearing at parties!

It was normal in my peer group (couple of beers or alcopops each, not spirits at that stage) but I think it became more prevalent in year 10.

My brother’s (5 years younger) year group on the other hand didn’t start drinking until at least year 11 so it really seems to vary.