To leave DS's clothes on DH's favourite part of the sofa?

[TornadoOfToys]

DS (8) has to do physio exercises every day. Yesterday he didn't because I was working and day before was a disaster where all hell let loose re school. Kicking punching us etc.
DH started playing Nintendo at 6. Around 8 he let DD play.
I asked DS this morning, 830 ish, i.e. after breakfast to come and do his exercises. "No I will not." I forcibly turned off Nintendo at 930. Told DS he had to put his washing away and Do his exercises before screen went back on. DD had washing to put away. She did.
After lunch, DH gave DS dessert and seconds. I said that was enough because he hadn't done what he was asked. DH gave him a slither more.
After lunch DH turned machine on again and played til supper. DS still hasn't done exercises and washing.
DH has just had a go at me for not being nice to DS. (He started wittering on about game and I told him to go to the bathroom.) Not being interested in his conversation and only telling him off. (Atrocious table manners).
WIBU from now on to pile DS's clothes in DH's favourite spot? Because, you know it's unimportant stuff.

I think both your DS and your DH should have more respect for you.

I'm confused about the bathroom bit but other than that why is your dh playing the Nintendo all day? I'm not against adults gaming, each to their own, but surely it's for free time not all the time - that would drive me mad.
I'm not surprised the dcs think they can play all day if that's what their dad does tbh

I told DS to start to get ready for bed Minor. He started to walk to the bathroom, did a u turn and came back to start talking of the game. It's all they talk about... i said "that's nice. Now go and get ready for bed."

But i wouldnt have to be constantly telling Ds off if he did as he was bloody told in the first place. Every time he asked me for something (beyond basics) I asked if he had done his two things. Then told him to come back when he had. This is apparently unfair.

I am pissed off becuase I spent the whole morning doing the washing and the afternoon assembling ikea shit and tidying up. I know it was my choice but I'm fed up of all my requests to DS being met with "No, i will not."

Don't use food as a weapon.

You and your DH need to grow up and support each other.

Does your DH have a gaming addiction or something? He doesn't sound remotely supportive.

Your dh is being a dick. He should be backing you up but he's actually undermining you.

If I were you I'd go out for the day with dd tomorrow.

Every time he asked me for something (beyond basics) I asked if he had done his two things. Then told him to come back when he had. This is apparently unfair

That's how I do things too. Can I go on my tablet? When you've finished your homework. Can I go call on x? When you've tidied your room. It's pretty much the only way to get stuff done!

Most parents I know do it like that, your dh needs to grow up

Not sure what you mean by that NewYear? I really don't see it's unreasonable to teach him he can't have multiple desserts if he doesn't do any activity.

No, not really rothbury. When he starts a game he wants to see it through to the end, but then will go a couple of months not touching it. Im sure he's also feeling guilty about the fiasco on Thursday when we had to physically drag Ds into school. He's never usually here during the day so has never seen Ds in one of his obstinate "I'm not going to school" modes. But yes I feel unsupported especially because I think his physio exercises are important and that he needs to do them.

We have massive physio battles and do exactly the same. No treats until it's done. Then she gets all huffy and argues with us about it, and gets more annoyed when the treats disappear completely.

In fact, apart from the violence your son sounds just like our 8 year old. Difference is her dad and I are on the same page. It hasn't made a whit of difference to sorting out her issues but it makes it a hell of a lot easier on us.

She hasn't seen her dad playing games and avoiding housework and yet she is no more willing to pitch in with Saturday housework than your son is so it's not as simple as folk just blaming your OH.

You do need to have a chat with him and agree what your joint approach is. Don't assume your way is the right way, talk about how you want to deal with the issues and agree a common ground.

What happens if she calls your bluff Originalfoogirl and still doesn't do the exercises. Do you let it go?

We are all going out together tomorrow, so at least he will do some sport this weekend. If he doesn't just sit down and refuse to move, that is.