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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Someone stole a photo of my baby and editited to lable her a c**t

67 replies

Bedsox · 27/01/2018 01:55

This is more of a rant but i am shocked and disgusted!

Im was part of a private group on facebook (i know) someone from the group stole a photo from my profile it was was my cover photo and wrote the word "cunt" on the picture then circulated it. All of my other photos are to the best of my knowledge private.

I know i shouldn't be mad if i put the photo on facebook and i know sharing photos of children have its implications of course, will make me think twice in the future bit equally i dont understand why someone would do that to a picture of a 19 month old. Seeing a photo of my dd and that word together was not nice and i hope i dont sound like a snowflake but upset me a lot.

I know IABU to have posted a photo of her i am just a very proud first time mum and a lot of my friends and family post pics of their children. My mil and my df post photos of my dd as well.

But aibu to feel really quite upset about it?

I feel a bit more sensitive at the moment when it comes to children a local family whom we all know has just lost their young boy who was otherwise fit and well. They suspect he died from flu any parents worst nightmare i feel heart broken for them. I usually have a very thick skin but i think that might be contributing to the way i feel about the photo.

All responses welcome and im totally expecting to hear about the full dangers of posting photos of children on social media and now i cant stress enough i 100% agree.

OP posts:
Addy2 · 27/01/2018 03:22

Just a thought, but are your old profile pics accessible to the public? If so, the pic might still be there. Log out and then search yourself so you know what can be seen.

People can be so vile. It's not just the troll that created the profile but the others who apparently thought it was funny... Angry

fatPam · 27/01/2018 03:24

"log it with 101"? Really?

I guess I'd be upset too but it isn't illegal. It isn't harassment and proving copyright is about the best you could ever hope for.

Aren't profile pictures always public?

Johnnycomelately1 · 27/01/2018 03:48

So it’s just a troll profile then. Probably some sad 15 year old trying to impress his mates.

Proudmummytodc2 · 27/01/2018 04:18

FAT PAM

Yes log it with police I have seen this happen before and it only got worse and the kids safety was compromised through threats ect.

The police said she should have logged the very first incident to build a case from start to end even though it seemed like someone was just creating a "meme" type photo and it didn't seem important to her but was deeply upsetting for her they said it was actually important and should have been logged.

So my advice was based on a previous experience a close friend went through.

So HUSKY it wasn't to "waste police time"

HandMsMonkey · 27/01/2018 04:35

Yeah I would log it with the police as well. Don't want to worry you but that isn't normal for someone to do that. Like why you... why your baby? Have you had an argument with anyone recently? If it's an obviously fake profile it might be set up for the purpose of pissing you off.

HuskyMcClusky · 27/01/2018 05:13

Proud, we will have to agree to disagree on that.

Original poster
Bedsox · 27/01/2018 09:48

Sorry everyone i ended up dropping off to sleep. I dont recall having any cross words with anyone recently apart from my best friend we had a misunderstanding but all resolved quickly and besides she would never do that she adores dd as i do her children.

OP posts:
BestZebbie · 27/01/2018 09:51

I'd presume that they didn't actually do it to label your baby, but you, given that it was the image you were using as your cover photo. (I appreciate that also isn't great but I honestly can't see this being a baby-attack instead of directed at the person who uses that picture as their identity).

Saz1995 · 27/01/2018 09:53

Is the page mummy and me ?💗

gamerpigeon · 27/01/2018 09:56

I believe all profile pics and cover pics on Facebook are public, you can't turn that off.

Flutterbyeee · 27/01/2018 09:57

That is awful. Of course you would be upset. Just sounds like a seriously warped sense of humour. I would be raging over that.

HSMMaCM · 27/01/2018 09:57

If it's not someone you know, maybe it's someone who thought a Facebook page had been set up for a baby and they were expressing their feelings about that?

Horrible thing to happen though and completely unnecessary.

Toast3 · 27/01/2018 10:01

No wonder you’re upset. That’s horrible!

Original poster
Bedsox · 27/01/2018 10:02

My profile photo was of me it was just my cover photo displayed as dd those pics are always public ive changed them now. No i dont think based on the photos or bio anyone would think the profile was set up for a child

OP posts:
JustDanceAddict · 27/01/2018 10:05

THat is not banter. If you know who did it, report to FB at least. And change your public photos.

happychange · 27/01/2018 10:16

Sorry to hear op , I would feel so violated too if I was you
It's not funny at all

I never post any photos of my DS on Facebook, or very few only because of this. I hate the idea of him accidentally becoming a meme or whatever. Now I only share photos via WhatsApp to close family and friends

My mil uses a picture of my DS as her profile picture Hmm we have said we don't like it but there are other battles to fight sometimes

PurpleRobe · 27/01/2018 10:20

What was the group you were in?

Did they share the pic in that group?

Are they calling you a cunt or your kid?

Original poster
Bedsox · 27/01/2018 10:22

Ah i could never tell mil or my df not to have pics of her on their profiles they both love dd and are such proud grandparents but i have asked them to check their privacy and asked them if they could not use dd as public photos they both were fine with this and understood

OP posts:
Original poster
Bedsox · 27/01/2018 10:24

The group is secret you have to be invited to it which is a pain and the name is duplicated my dh searched for it after i left and never found it the group admins are quite strict. I was invited after i liked a picture on facebook

OP posts:
JingsMahBucket · 27/01/2018 10:30

I would report the actual post to Facebook in order to have it removed. Before you do so, screenshot everything. Good luck, YANBU.

ReanimatedSGB · 27/01/2018 10:37

This is unpleasant, and whoever did it is childish and spiteful but it's not a police matter. It's not a direct threat. You are in no danger from this person. Just leave the group and ignore it.

Nicknacky · 27/01/2018 10:39

Do people honestly think that as soon as someone does something nasty it becomes a police matter?! The police would do nothing else and they certainly aren't going to trace ip addresses for this.

And the "logging it" is a totally myth. That's not how it works. Your details will be on the system as you have contacted the police but there is no magical system that will marry it up with other incidents reported.

BahHumbygge · 27/01/2018 10:45

Cover photos and profile pics are always public on FB, even when you change them. All the photos in the folders "cover pictures" and "profile pictures" (or similar whatever they're called) are public... you can't change the privacy settings on these.

So don't just change your profile/cover pic. Make sure that you delete or move them from those folders. Also get loved ones to do likewise.

Jamiefraserskilt · 27/01/2018 11:01

The Admins are not strict enough! They have to approve members and did get this one right.

treeofhearts · 27/01/2018 11:02

The police are not going to trace the ip of some who called someone else a cunt. No matter their age. Do you have any idea what a pain in the arse it is to trace an IP? You have to get a court order for that.

I agree with a pp, its your cover photo, they're calling you a cunt not her. Still not nice but jesus calm down, she isn't being targeted as a particularly hysterical person suggested.

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