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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think crying over a puppy snapping at your heels is a bit pathetic?

466 replies

outofthefryingpan · 26/01/2018 22:32

We have a 7 month old pup. A small breed which will never grow higher that knee height. A friend came round unexpectedly with her 9 yo boy and because husband thought it was our daughter he let the pup down to greet her when he opened the door.

Pup ran outside and started snapping at ankles of the 9yo boy. Pup chased him a bit until husband managed to pick him up. Boy crying hysterically in floods of tears. Mother (friend) then storms off in a huff and apparently then arrives home herself in tears. Friend’s husband then demands we “do something about that dog”.
I’ve apologised profusely but they’re still all really upset about it. AIBU to think they’re being a bit pathetic about it? They’re good friends and I really value our relationship as I’ve always thought of them as really sensible people. Can’t believe the drama over this 5 second incident! I could understand it if it was a big dog but honestly- it’s tiny!

I suppose if you’re not used to dogs you don’t know how to deal with them but am I really BU to think it’s a daft drama over nothing?

OP posts:
Iusedtobecarmen · 26/01/2018 23:25

Oh parents should teach their dc that they will encounter animals at some point.
I've met so many they seem shocked to see a dog in a park!

Idontdowindows · 26/01/2018 23:26

we are talking about a pup not a Rottweiler.

You've not seen the damage a small dog can do, and a dog at 7 months has its ADULT teeth, not its puppy teeth. They lose those around 4 months of age.

And if they don't train their already entitled and violent dog NOW, they are going to end up with an aggressive adult dog. Great fun. Not.

Iusedtobecarmen · 26/01/2018 23:27

shush you
That's a different situation a nd I agree

Iusedtobecarmen · 26/01/2018 23:28

Entitled,violent dog?? For real?

inkandstone · 26/01/2018 23:32

Are you sure you mean "snapping" OP, or just normal playful puppy mouthing? It's unusual for a 7 month old puppy to snap.

Idontdowindows · 26/01/2018 23:32

Entitled,violent dog?? For real?

Yes, for real. And if you don't understand that, you should not own a dog.

Oysterbabe · 26/01/2018 23:33

My husband is afraid of and hates dogs. If your dog had done this to him he would have booted it in the face to protect himself as he would have thought it was attacking. You need to train it for its own good as well as everyone else's.
Yabu for not controlling your dog and for calling a 9 year old pathetic.

tabulahrasa · 26/01/2018 23:34

"windowswe are talking about a pup not a Rottweiler."

Pfft, my Rottweiler is my knee height and at 7 months much much further from being an adult dog than a small breed puppy is at that age given the difference in when they mature.

If he'd been biting/trying to bite children at 7 months old then it's quite rightly a serious issue... it isn't any less of one because it's a smaller breed.

Dazedandconfuzzled · 26/01/2018 23:35

I hate stuff like this. I grew up on a farm surrounded by animals, have worked in rescue centres etc etc. I love animals. However that does not mean I like it if a dog snaps at me. And I sure as he'll would think that my dd would be terrified. She generally likes animals a lot and is confident around them but a few months ago a guy was walking his collie off lead but obviously couldn't control it as it was still young and not trained, we were also walking on a public footpath the dog charged at my dd, not in an aggressive way just excited, barrels into her and knocks her over. She is 2. Of course it fucking scared her. All the love of animals in the world and always showing her that animals are friendly are not going to change the fact that it is damn scary to have a dog run at you as a child.
My dad trained sheepdogs. There was a local farmer who had a very badly behaved dog who never stopped nipping at ankles. Did my dad say 'i must teach my kids how to act around this dog' no he told the owner that until he could control it we wouldn't be getting out of the car.

salsmum · 26/01/2018 23:35

Get a can put some stones in and tape the top if pup goes to bite ANYONE rattle right near pup he will then learn that it's not nice to nip or bite. I'm an owner of a very friendly staffy she has never bitten or nipped once in her 12 years....my friend has an adult shitzu (I've always owned dogs and know about body language etc.) I sat down in her house and let dog come to me, dog very calmly put his two front paws on my leg, in a friendly way after a while I just slowly lowered my head ( but not too close in personal space etc.) the lil bugger without warning bit me on the nose, it was not accidental and was done with force and with not so much as a warning growl,( think head butt then bite) my nose bled where the tooth went in and it hurt!
IF it had been my staffy the police would have been called and she would have been PTS..because this dog was small after my friend made sure I was ok it was then seen as a joke and she went on to tell me of previous 'nips' ( all said in a lighthearted way).
My pain threshold is high this child was obviously really scared and may have had to then go to GP for a tetanus jab which could have been avoided. That could have been ANYONE on the other side of that door even a younger child Shock so you ABU a biting dog is a biting dog train your dog and take responsibility for its actions like a responsible dog owner.

Ihatemarmite123 · 26/01/2018 23:37

Op you said it was a 5 second incident, was the child bit? Was the puppy jumping around excitedly or snapping aggressively? Sounds like he needs some training. My youngest dog gets very excited and jumps up, he's only small but it really does petrify a child if they don't like dogs.

Dogs can't tell the difference between an upset hysterical child trying to get away or an excited child encouraging them to play.

I used to be petrified of dogs until my 20s but I bloody love them now Grin

Iusedtobecarmen · 26/01/2018 23:37

oyster you dh wouldn't have been anywhere near my house to boot my dog.
Like I said upthread i choose people im friends with.

CheshireChat · 26/01/2018 23:39

You can be both a dog owner and scared of other dogs. We had dogs throughout my entire life till I moved and I was still scared of unknown dogs as a child because of a bad encounter.

How would you have reacted if it hadn't been a 9 year old, but a toddler? The dog doesn't listen to you, you couldn't grab it straight away and as said, all dogs can inflict damage even if they're small. If it's knee height it's a medium breed, not a small anyway- my knee height spaniel weighed about the same as my tall 3 year old.

YouOKHun · 26/01/2018 23:39

Completely out of order to let your dog behave like that. I love dogs and train working dogs but I remember being very frightened at a young age by bouncing over enthusiastic out of control dogs. You are in the wrong and need to get the number of a good obedience trainer and go along and learn how to manage your dog’s behaviour, if you can’t be arsed to do that or can’t see the need then you shouldn’t own a dog.

ReanimatedSGB · 26/01/2018 23:41

I think it was OP's husband who 'managed' to pick the dog up, and the friend's husband was not present but phoned OP's house when his wife and child arrived home distressed after their encounter with the dog.

My DS dislikes dogs. He's 13 now and therefore doesn't scream in fright, but he's really not very keen. This has a lot to do with the fact that, when he was about 3, I went round to deliver an order to a client, and took him with me, and when the client opened the door, her two dogs came thundering down the hall, barking their fucking heads off. Now, she spoke to the dogs and they settled, and I could see this was cheerful, excited barking (I don't much care for pets but I grew up with dogs and cats) rather than aggressive - but DS was only 3 and they were (to him) enormous noisy barky things, and he was terrified.
It's not 'precious' or unreasonable to be scared of dogs, or not to like them very much. If you have dogs, don't expect visitors to be thrilled with them, and keep them under control FFS.

Fitbitironic · 26/01/2018 23:43

Another one here whose DC had no issues with dogs whatsoever until chased by one badly trained/controlled dog who chased and 'snapped' at his heels. Frightened of dogs for a long time after that and is still wary. Crappy owners of a badly trained and behaved dog have quite possibly ruined his previous love of dogs for a long time in the future. You don't know the whole history of your friend's DS interaction with other dogs, OP. But you do sound like a crappy owner and a very unsympathetic person.

NNchangedforthis · 26/01/2018 23:43

My kids are scared of dogs - no idea why. But they are kids and allowed to have irrational fears. My friend has a 7 month old lab puppy. Never once have I witnessed that dog snap or “playfully” nip anyone and I’m around him, out for walks with them all the time.
She knows my kids are scared, so pops the dog behind the kitchen Stairgate.

If any dog started biting my children’s ankles then I would kick it out of the way. I’m sorry but my kids come before someone else’s pet.

Sort your attitude out and get your dog trained correctly Angry

Originalfoogirl · 26/01/2018 23:44

Oh parents should teach their dc that they will encounter animals at some point. I've met so many they seem shocked to see a dog in a park!

You can’t “teach” fear out of a child.

But yes, I have taught her there are some dicks of dog owners out there who will let their dogs off lead, run about amongst kids playing and insist its ok because “he’s just being friendly”. I’ve also taught her that I will deal with those dogs and their owners.

fuzzyduck1 · 26/01/2018 23:45

Some people dont like dogs so the best thing you can do about your dog is not let this kid round your house anymore.
Problem solved

vandrew4 · 26/01/2018 23:46

This reply has been deleted

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Originalfoogirl · 26/01/2018 23:46

My kids are scared of dogs - no idea why
You are a terrible parent who never encouraged them to lick every dog they ever saw, obvs.

At least, that’s what people tell me.

BulletFox · 26/01/2018 23:47

Originalfoogirl that's true, it always struck me about Bertrand Russell throwing his young son into water to try to 'cure' his fear of it, didn't work.

LipstickHandbagCoffee · 26/01/2018 23:49

You really have no understanding or empathy of child being frightened
Or how parents will naturally feel protective of their scared child
You’re minimising this. Parents are right, sort the dog out.sort your self out

Ihatemarmite123 · 26/01/2018 23:49

Get a safety gate so your dog can't run out too

Teabagtits · 26/01/2018 23:49

Owners have a strict liability when it comes to their dog’s behaviour so opinion really is irrelevant. Your dog was out of control and not on a lead. As owner you’re liable for any damage it causes. It may have been pure luck the child wasn’t actually injured. No 7mo dog should be so poorly trained and socialised so as to behave like that, by 7m they should know better as should the owner.

I’m a dog lover but I’d have no qualms about dealing with what sounds like a happy wee shite in whatever terms necessary to make my children feel safe. No wonder the friends went home in tears, not only did their 9yo have a traumatic experience but you clearly didn’t give a shit about something that was fully your responsibility