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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Vulnerable adults and credit cards

7 replies

kokosnuss · 25/01/2018 22:40

Asking on behalf of a family member struggling with her DS.

DS has a learning disability, lives at home and isn't able to work. Has no impulse control, poor decision-making ability, and is very young emotionally.

Currently over £1000 of PIP and ESA per month is paid directly to him. He is spending it all almost immediately on drinking, gaming, other stuff you'd expect a lad of 21 (though emotionally much younger) with no impulse control to buy, and then asking DM for more money when he runs out, which she gives to an extent but refuses if it gets too much.

Not only that, but she's recently learnt he's managed to get a credit card.

AIBU to think a company should not be allowed to give credit to an unemployed young adult with no credit history, even if they don't know he also has a learning disability? If he has run up a debt, would DM have any recourse to the Financial Ombudsman or similar with regards to the irresponsibility of the credit provider?

DM seems to be stuck in a horrible spot where society is treating DS like an adult (e.g. PIP/ESA is paid directly to him, companies will give him credit), but he doesn't have the impulse control to handle it and constantly threatens to get himself into serious trouble. She's also scared that if she refuses to give him money, he will just apply for another credit card, or worse, a payday loan or something. He lies and hides things very willingly and she often only knows half the truth about anything.

What can she do?

OP posts:
retirednow · 25/01/2018 22:42

She can speak to the social services safeguarding team,

Gazelda · 25/01/2018 22:44

Agree with pp. she could also try Mencap.

Batmanwearspants · 25/01/2018 22:44

Second speaking to an adults safeguarding team.

Your friend also needs to stop giving him money when he runs out.

DriveInSaturday · 25/01/2018 22:47

You need someone with better knowledge than me here, but I think his mum could get deputyship over his financial affairs. It's like power of attorney for people who haven't ever had capacity. I am crap at links, but Google deputyship.

kokosnuss · 25/01/2018 22:57

Thanks everyone, we hadn't even considered safeguarding to include financial risk too. That's very helpful.

OP posts:
shakeyourcaboose · 25/01/2018 23:07

Am wondering if he applied on line and they just saw the £1k a month income? Is there a possible filter that would block these type of sites from computer?

kokosnuss · 26/01/2018 07:25

Just bumping in case there are any other experiences out there now everyone is awake!

OP posts:
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