To feel daft and embarrassed

[sunsetstars]

I’m new at work. There was a meeting and I didn’t know where it was. I saw some people heading in that direction and said “are you going to X meeting? Mind if I follow you?”

I'm with you OP.

I won some vouchers to a circus once (thanks MN). We eventually found it (long story), got the tickets, and went into the tent.
The man checking the tickets said something like 'oh these are for tomorrow'. I nearly exploded. It was not funny when we had been driving round in circles for an hour trying to find where it was.

You could day 'oh thanks a lot arseholes! - oops only joking!'

People crack that type of 'joke' all the time. Whilst it isn't gut-bustingly hilarious it's nothing to feel daft/embarrassed about.

Forget about it

Sounds like they are glad their 'first days' are behind them!!

It’s just banter! Bants!

Just laugh along with them and think of some funny come back for next time.

They're not putting you down or being nasty, that's a daft suggestion.

They were just being really clear that of course you can and they'd expect nothing else.

Honestly, you need to try to develop a bit of a thicker skin if you can manage it.

I actually think this is meant to make the person feel uncomfortable not comfortable.

Calm the fuck down. You are new and still getting to grips with things. From what you have said I doubt they meant any malice. You will soon be in the group heading to a meeting whilst inducting a newbie.

Get a grip. They were trying to break the ice, obvs they picked the wrong person.

Wow,some weird responses on here to a silly joke. Makes the ops reaction seem almost normal.

Op are you always so sensitive and have a tendency to over think things?

They were being a bit silly and insensitive, but not overly malicious I don't think. Early days can be hard, but things get easier with time.

I think I'd have had a WTF? moment as well. But in their heads they were being friendly and welcoming, I'm sure. They didn't see that what you needed was just straightforwardness - but don't dwell on it, and don't feel daft.

YANBU to feel embarrassed. I hate that kind of joke, one that makes someone feel awkward. My lovely late uncle used to do it and it would make me quite upset. I hate people taking the mickey/using embarrassment as humour.

However, it's not intended to upset, it's just that some of us don't find that stuff funny. And that's our issue. They're being nice in their own way.

It's a stupid joke, don't take it personally. No one will have thought anything about you.

I don't find it funny either, but some people do. Don't worry about it.

I would actually think less of them for that to be honest. Just seems quite unprofessional and childish and it sounds like you were a bit nervous so the done thing would be say “of course, no problem”, or “oh I know, it’s a bit of a labyrinth” or whatever.

It certainly wouldn’t happen at my place of work and there is plenty of genuine banter! Genuine banter would have been someone, say, holding their umbrella like a tour guide, and saying “follow me, my group!” Or something silly like that.

I KNOW what everyone is saying, they didn’t mean anything nasty. If they didn’t mean it then they need to learn a bit of empathy and realise that when someone is new and nervous the last thing they want is to be wrong-footed for a few seconds and feel flustered.

Those type of “no, you can’t” banter situations would happen between people who know each other well in my place of work.

YANBU OP, I dislike this sort of 'joke'. They are not remotely funny and make me a bit uncomfortable. However, they are generally meant kindly, so try not to take it personally. Starting a new job is stressful and it's the little things that can get to us

Some responses on here are out of proportion. Is there any need to swear at the OP or tell her to get a grip? People respond differently to jokes. Calm down.

they need to learn a bit of empathy and realise that when someone is new and nervous the last thing they want is to be wrong-footed for a few seconds and feel flustered.

This. Exactly this.

Makes me think of the time I asked my new boss "where's the meeting?" He sighed and said "There's a notice of meeting in your pigeonhole." So I walked to the other end of the building, where I found out that the meeting was back in the very room in which I had questioned my boss. He was a dick. Your colleagues were just being lighthearted, OP. You sound anxious and like you struggle with social cues.

They were joking! Try not to dwell on it.

It might have been that one person said they were just nipping to the loo first, you said "Can I follow you" and they were having a wind up at your expense?
Really don't think there's any malice though.

I guess if you're very young, it was perhaps hard for you to realise they were joking with you, but if you aren't, you do need to toughen up a bit. I would honestly see that as quite a friendly overture, and certainly more so than a straightforward 'OK'.

I have started at a new gym, and did not know where my class was. I then saw the instructor walk past, so I said "I guess I just follow you", I then followed him ....into the men's toilets. He said " I think you want to go down the corridor and then to the right"

That was more embarrassing!

Things happen. People are people you will be fine, promise!

This might post twice, I just lost it anyway I am inclined to agree with PPs in that there was no harm meant and the OP is over-thinking it a little. In my workplace, 'tailgating' through doors is a security issue taken v v seriously and we are always getting reminders about holding doors open for peoplè or otherwise enabling access to those we don't know so there might have been a little bit of an 'you work here, you know that Following is not allowed ha ha'. Maybe?

I would actually think less of them for that to be honest

Jesus Christ. Really?

I think they might have actually been trying to make her more relaxed by pulling her leg.

I highly doubt ever single one of them thought 'let's be malicious to the new girl'