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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask how you keep on top of the house work?

120 replies

ThisLittleKitty · 25/01/2018 13:28

I have 4 kids and wow I am really struggling to keep on top of it! It's not dirty just messy. There are forever clothes hanging up everywhere to dry as I have constant piles of washing. The dishes hardly ever done, don't think the sinks ever been empty since I've had the youngest. How do you manage to keep on top of the house work if you have young kids?

OP posts:
Afreshcuppateaplease · 25/01/2018 16:38

I use the fly lady thread on here op. Its good.

I dont really follow the fly lady plan but i enjoy the chat and list sharing motivates me

rubberducker · 25/01/2018 16:42

Have a look at the organised mum - she has a blog and is on Instagram etc. She advocates basically setting aside 30 mins a day (doesn't all have to be in one block of time) and tacking a different room every day of the week. Plus having essential jobs that you do every day.

I pick and choose which elements I follow, but actually having the thought that it's only 30 minutes (and I set a timer!) helps motivate me to get it done. And it really is amazing what you can achieve in 30 minutes of concentrated effort.

itsveryquiet · 25/01/2018 17:54

It won’t be like this forever. Mine are now preteens and I’m missing the days where they had toys everywhere to play.

FluffyWuffy100 · 25/01/2018 18:20

Four children under 7? Yeah that’s going to be hard to keep clean and tidy!!

I have a cleaner, a dishwasher and a tumble dryer.

Recommend all of the above!

ApproachingATunnel · 25/01/2018 18:26

I try to tidy up little areas and im forever tidying up. It’s still not tidy as my 2 are like little tornadoes.
I get stressed when guests are coming over because there’s never enough time to make the living room look how i’d like it to.
It’s a lisibg battle i reckon. I’ll have it all tidy when they grow up tho.

Gemlou1989 · 25/01/2018 18:34

I also have 4 and we all chip in, I do the majority but the kids know how to switch on the washer and dryer and how to put their clothes away (they are 11, 9, 7 & 4). It's chaos even if it slides for 1 day I just try not to steps it because one day there won't be hardly anything to do and Im sure I'll be at a loss! Grin

Gemlou1989 · 25/01/2018 18:36
  • stress not steps ffs lol
XiCi · 25/01/2018 18:42

I have a cleaner. I really wasn't keeping on top of it before then. If you can afford it, even for a couple of hours a week or fortnight, I'd really recommend it.

Lashalicious · 25/01/2018 18:47

Probably impossible with 4 dc under 7 yrs. Oh my, no way I could keep up....only thing I can think of is to pare down all the family’s wardrobes so that there’s not so many sets of clothes to keep up with. However, I understand that 4 dc are going to go through clothes very fast.

Your dh will have to help with dishes and cooking. 4 dc under 7 is a full time 24/7 job, op.

ThisLittleKitty · 25/01/2018 18:58

Unfortunately I'm a single parent so no partner around to help. The kids don't visit him either so no chance to do it while their away or anything. Cleaner would be nice but I'm the type that will want to clean before the cleaner comes so she doesn't see the mess! Lol

OP posts:
Lashalicious · 25/01/2018 19:05

Oh no, so no help then. You may have to let things go a bit, just doing the bare basics. I agree about the cleaner. It seems cleaners are for people who have mostly clean or uncluttered houses to begin with. I too would feel like I’d have to clean before the cleaner came.

DrSeuss · 25/01/2018 19:11

I find ceasing to give a shit helps!

Chaosofcalm · 25/01/2018 19:14

I think if you are at home with 4 kids under 7 then you will create a lot of mess.

speakout · 25/01/2018 19:16

A trip to the laundrette?
You could get huge load washed and dried in two hours. Maybe not every week, but when things get on top of you just stuff everything into black bags and take a trip.

2pups · 25/01/2018 19:26

I have a large laundry basket wash twice a week - put it in piles for each child and me & dh straight from Tumble drier and then straight upstairs into rooms.

Kids old enough tidy own rooms. I tidy others and do 1 clean a week.

I don't cook from scratch and shop online.

I have 4 kids too.

I will cook from scratch and do supermarket shop once they are all School age.

loveablether · 25/01/2018 20:11

I am in early stages of organised Mum method now - thanks for tip!

livingthegoodlife · 25/01/2018 20:14

I have a cleaner. I use the washing machine and tumble dryer every day. I fold washing and ironing it when I have a few baskets worth. I tidy the kitchen every morning and evening. Kids tidy their bedrooms every morning before breakfast. We have a playroom to hide the toys! It was much worse before we got the cleaner....

raindropsandsunshine · 25/01/2018 21:18

I think to have a home you'd happily welcome a guest into without notice, is to have an empty draining board, clean surfaces, clean floors, clean bathroom and tidy living room area. I don't always win at getting it all done, but between my husband and I we manage most of it! Washing up is my worst, I often leave some overnight as I just simply can't be bothered to stand there and do it. Confused

raindropsandsunshine · 25/01/2018 21:19

On sunny days or even grey windy days, as long as it's dry you can get some good hours in of drying washing outside.

Itsthattimeagain · 25/01/2018 21:48

I use an app called Clean My House. You can set the tasks up yourself to suit your own house/needs, and set how often each one needs completing. As I'm list-obsessed I love ticking off each item and seeing what I've achieved each day!
Daily I will clean the kitchen worktops, make the beds, and declutter and brush the kitchen and lounge. I generly then have one room to focus on each day. I like the fact that I can break it down into tiny chunks (dust/hoover/clean microwave/clean hob) and it looks like I've done loads Grin

Don't be hard on yourself OP, you've got your work cut out and I admire you!

LittleFeileFooFoo · 26/01/2018 02:53

Itsthattimeagain. I was hoping the app cleaned the house...

Itsthattimeagain · 26/01/2018 04:25

I'd pay a LOT of money for an app like that!

SunnyLikeThursday · 26/01/2018 04:34

I've had a sort of system that worked to a point during toddler years. I think the baby and toddler years and having multiple little ones is very hard though especially if they are lively and creative.

You're doing a brilliant job. My Mum's best advice is "put your feet up and shut your eyes" and I think there is something to be said for that.

Otherwise, here is my system:

I handed over everything possible to robots. That cost a bit, but no more than a cleaner over a period of time. Here are the robots:

Roomba vaccum cleaner upstairs
roomba vaccum cleaner downstairs
Bravva for hard floors

My toddler really liked the robots so would get really into picking up toys on the condition that he was then allowed to turn on the roomba and then chase it around while it vacuumed. The deal was "lets tidy up so we can run the roomba" and that worked well.

I also bought a lot of plastic boxes and had our attic floored, and a sturdy wooden loft ladder put in that a toddler can climb. We would then grab loads of clutter and throw it in the boxes and then take them up to the attic while the roomba cleaned, and then the toddler would choose a new box to bring back down. That saved a lot on new toys, as attic toys were new enough to be exciting all over again.

We turned our dining room into a utility room, and put a tumble dryer and extra fridge freezer there. That cut down on laundry work a lot and meant that I didn't work nearly so hard managing inventory in a tiny fridge freezer.

Our oven is a self-cleaning one, which again costs money, but no more than a cleaner over time. It saves a lot of work.

Getting rid of nasty old carpets was transformative for us. Our house had been rented before for years and one of the carpets seemed to be generating dust at an alarming rate, which turned the air into an unhealthy fog every day. Once we changed to wood floors I had about 30 minutes less work a day.

I think that more cupboards would help. We have no cupboards and that is the bane of my life tbh. Having somewhere to put stuff really helps as it's impossible to clean until all the clutter is off the floors and surfaces. Getting clutter under control is massively important in order to get stuff clean. I have totally not got that sorted yet.

Another thing that helped me was imagining that I have a cleaner and doing all the stuff for myself that I would have to do for her.

So that means mainly working out what cleaning materials would be needed in each room and putting them there ready to be used and then making a list of tasks that can then be scheduled.

It means, for example, that when I get a second I can just grab a sponge and soap that is already in the bathroom and quickly clean round, rather than having to go down to the kitchen and rummage around and remember that there is no appropriate cleaning stuff, and make a mental note to buy it and so on.

I have the right cleaning stuff in the kitchen always too, and buying too much is okay as it keeps. I also have a spray bottle of vinegar in the kitchen and bathroom. I use ordinary fairy liquid to clean the kitchen and johnson's baby shampoo in the bathroom as they are there anyway and are non-toxic.

I also fine tuned all my cleaning so that it was super-quick and organised a rote of one room per day of the week. Here's what I do:

Kitchen - clear all toys to living room. Do dishwasher. Move remaining stuff all to one side. Clean over with sponge and fairy liquid. Dry with tea towels. Move stuff back and clean other side. Braava does floor. Having a massive stack of tea towels really helps. I put wet tea towels flat on the top of the hob to soften gunk and then it just cleans off with a wipe of the wet tea towel, which saves a lot of harsh chemicals being used. The kitchen is much harder with a crawling baby, and I have no idea what the answer is to that. The crawling and weaning years were very hard for us, what with constantly cleaning blueberry puree off the walls and everything else three times a day.

Bathroom - I spray the sink with vinegar and leave it for two hours. I then clean round with johnson's baby shampoo and the place is easily made spotless because the vinegar has done all the work. I keep kitchen towel in the bathroom as drying stuff is most of the work where there is chrome. Much more than cleaning it. I just wipe the floor at the edges and then all the dust sort of rolls up into balls and the roomba collects them.

Hall, living room and dining room are clutter-controlled one day each per week, even if total armageddon breaks out in between. It means that no matter which day a person comes, there is always one room that is civilised for them to be in.

Bedrooms - the whole family helps to strip the beds and to make them up at the end of the day. We pick up all books and toys and run the roomba. The washing machine and tumble dryer do most of the other work.

Recently I've discovered that one good way to keep on top of the folding of clothes is to do while ds gets into his school uniform in the morning, as it keeps me still while he is concentrating, and gets stuff done.

I also use folding clothes as a meditation activity in the evening when I am so stressed that I have indigestion. It is weirdly effective.

Anyway, this is what I've worked out. It's still hard to keep on top of it all and I only have one 7 year old and no job. With multiple young kids it must be really hard.

Take it easy on yourself. You're doing a great job.

Thanks for letting me list all this too. I worked so hard to figure it all out and it makes me proud to be able to write it all down.

SunnyLikeThursday · 26/01/2018 04:34

Wow! That was a long post.

hungryhippo90 · 26/01/2018 06:37

I’ll be honest, I spend 10 minutes in each room, each day, tI dying, or wiping or Something, when I look at it in smaller chunks it isn’t such a problem.

DD gets pocket money for helping out- usually it’s her job to run up the washing and put it away- what’s hers goes in her room- so the child is getting exercise running up and down the stairs too! She is fairly good at keeping her room tidy which makes me very proud, one of her chores is removing all of her stuff from the kitchen/living room every few days which helps a great deal.

I am constantly trying to declutter. I’ve always got a bag of stuff on its way out of the house which is also quite helpful. If it’s not here it can’t clutter the place up.

I also have a cleaner- more for the fact that I would die of shame if she thought I was dirty, so I’m motivated to get the house to a reasonable standard- she says it’s one of her easiest houses so I guess it must work quite well.

My other thing, and I promise I’m not showing off, is that we have a small family and an average sized house, we have an office and a spare room, paper of any sort goes no further than the office, and clothes go in the spare room except for a few essential pieces of clothing like undies, pjs, swimming costumes and a 2 outfits each for very casual days. It sounds mental I know, but I have to be this way or my house would literally be littered with letters and both clean and dirty washing.