Should I accept myself as I am?

[Jaygee61]

I am a size 10-12. I eat healthily, try to watch my portions, hardly any sugar, don't eat junk, alcohol at weekends only and then not much, exercise most days (cardio and strength), my health indicators (blood pressure, resting pulse, cholesterol, waist measurement) are all fine but I am half a stone over the maximum healthy weight for my height. BMI 26.2. I'm not embarrassed about how I look but would rather be 8-10 than 10-12. But every time I go for a general health check up I'm weighed and told to do all the things I'm already doing! I have an underactive thyroid which makes losing weight difficult. So should I just accept myself as I am and concentrate on staying the weight I am rather than trying to lose weight?

www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/bmi-stop-measuring-weight-height-health-measure-fitness-fat-a7894951.html

Bit easier to digest than the clinical studies but it is only part of a much bigger picture. It depends how much body fat you have and where it is. Fat on the thighs and bottom in women is much healthier than fat around the middle. BMI is a very weak indicator of health (obviously unless you are at an extreme of the scale).

You honestly sound fine, but it does sound like you are working very hard to maintain a size yiu aren't so happy with. That would make me question your thyroid trouble. I would be pushing for an endocrinologist referral, the blood tests are notoriously unreliable & if you are feeling symptoms & working too hard to maintain your weight, then you need an expert opinion.

Have you seen the Dr Peatfield Durrant books, How to Heal Your Thyroid etc. Lots of info in those that might be of help

BMI isn’t “flawed”. It’s just a very blunt instrument and it doesn’t suit certain (rare) outliers

You're a 10-12 which is perfectly healthy

There is no such thing as a healthy dress size.

Clothes don't work that way and as none of us here can see the OP (unlike her doctor), I think it's best to steer clear of talk of dress sizes altogether in relation to health.

Op I think you're in denial about your calorie intake and expenditure tbh. I'm expecting a nasty response given previous posts on the thread, but that's the truth.

I believe you think that is "the truth* but it isn't. As well as exercising, I work on the 4th floor of my building and I never use the lift.

For breakfast today I had an oatibix, berries, banana, seeds and skimmed milk. For lunch I had chicken in a home made tomato sauce and brown rice, which was half of my last night's dinner portion. Tonight I will be having a small piece of quiche and salad, no dressing. I have had no snacks. Does that sound excessive to you?

1 oatibix and fruit a big stodgy meal? What planet are you on? A small portion of brown rice? Crustless quiche and salad?

Hi OP

is this just the doctor telling you you are half a stone overweight?

I have a colleague who is size 8-10 - under 5ft though. She's probably gone from 8 to 10 with a gain of about half a stone or similar. She is in the "tiny" bracket where she could wear a Kylie Minogue type dress.

she went for her pill check and the nurse went on and on and on about her having gained a few pounds on the pill.

She came into work really upset and we looked it up on the chart thing and she isn't even at the top end of her weight for her height range - we were all looking at each other in utter bafflement at what had happened.

She did say the nurse added comments about how so many people are obese etc so I can only think she was unlucky and got someone's pet rant.

I also wonder if this is happening to you with your doc? Some doctors are obsessed with certain things.

also, are you only concerned about this because the doc keeps on about it? In that case I really wouldn't worry.

if you feel your thyroid meds aren't right I would ask for a referral to an endocrinologist though.

xpost
blackberryfairy - you think that sounds a lot of food? May I ask what you eat in a day? I'm just curious because I'm really amazed at someone describing that as a lot of food.

It's taken to get into my late 30's, to realise, I am who I am, I'm never going to be like a beauty queen, nor get 30 likes for a photo on Facebook, but I know, that I'm not fake, I don't use people and I care for others. Life shouldn't be about sizes or how you look. And yes, accept who you are! Then you will attract others, who accept you too

So BMI is one thing we can use to measure our health but it's part of a bigger picture.

As someone who spent years trying to maintain a BMI of 20 by not eating much and exercising too much (5.7, 8st 12) and felt bloody awful, was bloody miserable and most importantly had no periods for several years. BUT wouldn't get referred for treatment for as eating disorder as my BMI was ok, it was actually indicated to me by the GP that if I went down under 18.5 I would get treatment. For lots of people my height that weight would have been fine. For me it wasn't

I got over it (one of those sickening I found weight training stories) and was the healthiest I'd ever been, visible abs, lots of muscle and lots of compliments on my figure. Fitting into side 8-10 clothes. My BMI is now 24.5 (well was, currently preggers).

Although I now feel positively massive thanks to some comments on here. Good job I can understand that everyone is different.

Op, what height and weight are you?

Also, is that what you eat every day? No cheating, no booze?

I am 5ft 1.5 in, 9st 13lb. 28in waist by the way not 30 as suggested upthread. That is what I eat in a day. No booze during the week, a couple of glasses (really) at the weekend.

I’m an hourglass shape as opposed to a pear or apple or pillar shape. I think I would probably have a lot more to worry about health wise if I was an apple shape with skinny arms and legs.

OP age plays a factor as well, are you menopausal?
I use calorie counting because I really like certain calorie dense foods.
I also find if I eat more protein it helps with loosing weight.

I’m post menopausal.

Post menopausal is a huge factor.
Your calorie requirements will be significantly lower (WW is a form of calorie reduction, hence the reason you’ve been successful in the past).
If the return to your current weight was slow, chances you are only slightly overeating. If rapid you need to be vigilant.
Even if you come to accept your current weight, it would be prudent to count calories and weigh regularly to see how low your requirements are.

Bloody hell. You are size 10-12. That is not fat by any stretch of the imagination.

That is what I would LOVE to be!

Just because you would love to be that size loveka, doesn't mean nobody else could possibly be overweight at that size. The OP is for a start.

There are many factors to take into consideration, including height/weight/build etc.

How would you go about accepting how you are? What steps can you take to adjust your mindset?

I'm not trying to dig you out, but it must be more than just a decision.

Do you know what OP? I used to starve myself, would walk 4 miles to work do a 10 hour shift and then walk the 4 miles back 5/6 days per week. I obsessed over it and did this for 28 months.

You’d think I’d be skin and bone, no, I was a small size 12 at best. In fact my calves were that chunky from walking everywhere that I couldn’t wear normal wellies because they just werent wide enough.
Fast forward a couple of years and I’ve put weight on but the top and bottom of it is that if I’d wanted to be a size 8 I’d have had to eat cabbage soup all day every day and I just can’t comprehend doing that to myself.

Looking back I had a lovely figure as a size 12-14 and 5’7”. That was where I had the eating/exercise balance and that was the size I could easily attain. I’ve since put a fair bit of weight on since, I still exercise as live on a hill farm but my portions are huge and I snack late at night after the kiddos have gone to bed.

I bet you look fabulous.

All depends on your height. If you’re short, being a size 10-12 might actually make you fat and your measurements for BMI / waist etc might be invalid. My GP has told me that if you are shorter than 5 4 you generally should be at the lower end of the normal BMI scale & being even slightly overweight can be the same as being obese for a 5 ft 6 person.

The OP is 5ft 1

Never trusted BMI measurements since the doctor told me I perfectly fine after living on less than 400 calories a day for year, my kidneys were packing up, no periods , bones sticking out but the bmi measurements put me well within normal. Looking back at pictures he should have looked at me and recognised my eating disorder, but no the bmi measurements were fine. I actually am at my most enetgetic, best looking and fittest right at the very top of the normal range. Some people do weigh heavier than others yet look exactly the same.