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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be annoyed the charity shop would not accept my donation

643 replies

Bearbehind · 21/01/2018 13:49

I've had a bit of a clear out and had some stuff to take the the charity shop.

I checked on line it was open today then took the stuff into town.

You can't park right outside so I carried the stuff, in the snow, to the shop only to see a sign which said they no longer open on Sundays.

Oh well, I thought but, all the lights were on and I could see at least 3 people inside so I knocked the door and someone opened it.

He said they were shut and I explained I didn't want to come in, just drop these donations off.

He outright refused to accept them, because they were shut, and I'd have to go to another branch of theirs that was open today or come back tomorrow.

AIBU to think that if someone has made the effort to bring a donation to a charity shop and if there's are people there, they should accept them.

I'll be buggered if I'm taking stuff to them again.

OP posts:
YerAuntFanny · 21/01/2018 17:25

YABU, i used to help out at a national charity shop.

We had to do a monthly stock take as that was how often things were to be rotated, cleared and sent to stores elsewhere if they were not sold. This took quite a lot of effort and time, taking donations during this or out with working hours would've made things worse as they need counted and processed when they came in.

The volunteers could've been in the midst of this or they could've been dealing with an incident such as an alarm, burst pipe, attempted break in etc etc so been too busy to deal with donations at that point in time.

The fact that they took the time to answer the door rather than ignore you tells me there was a reason they had to close.

Original poster
Bearbehind · 21/01/2018 17:27

If it's not not as easy as possible for you, you can't be arsed

Why should it be made difficult to donate stuff to a charity ?

'Easy' would have binning it in the first place.

OP posts:
LadyBunnysWig · 21/01/2018 17:27

Name me one person who says, I want to support a charity so I'll give them things I'd prefer to keep?

Me?
I would love to keep all my clothes but sadly it's pointless. They're either taking up space, don't fit me or I just haven't worn them in a year. I often donate things that I would prefer to keep on the off chance I fit in them/they come back in style but I know deep down I'll never wear them ever again.

londonrach · 21/01/2018 17:28

Yanbu.

LadyBunnysWig · 21/01/2018 17:29

If it's not made as easy as possible for you, you can't be arsed.

In fairness to the OP she did bag them up, drive out there and carry them through the snow to the shop. She did go to some effort to try and make the donation. Rather than react positively she has spat her dummy out because she was told no rather than being rewarded with a lolly pop

roundaboutthetown · 21/01/2018 17:29

Bearbehind - easy is exactly what you have said you are now opting for. Lazy, selfish...

Original poster
Bearbehind · 21/01/2018 17:30

lbw you are then donating them because they're of no use to you.

That's not the same as giving to the charity for the sole reason of supporting them.

OP posts:
Gazelda · 21/01/2018 17:30

OP, I'd have been slightly annoyed too. But please don't take this unfortunate incident as a reason not to support charities in the future. It was (hopefully) a one off situation which some customer training for the volunteer would easily rectify.

It wouldn't have taken him a minute to explain why. Maybe it as stocktaking. Maybe there was a delivery coming in at the back. Maybe it was too do with storage space. Maybe it was to do with their gift aid record keeping. All very justifiable reasons. Who knows.

A quick email to the charity HO to let them know that the website needs updating would be a huge help to them and to other donors.

Don't let this put you off, charities need all the support they can get and are generally very grateful.

helenoftroyville · 21/01/2018 17:31

YABU

You can't hammer on the door of an establishment that is closed until someone opens. How rude.

I work in a job dealing with the public, and it is shocking how people are rude, selfish and entitled. They really only think of themselves.

OP was only thinking of her own needs today, she didn't give any thought to the volunteers working on a Sunday, or why the shop has been forced to reduce its opening hours, or why the website hasn't been updated (staff shortages? loss of skills?) her only concern was herself, now she plans to teach the charity a lesson by binning her donation. How petty.

Original poster
Bearbehind · 21/01/2018 17:32

lazy, selfish

Maybe roundabout but the sheer volume of excuses for not accepting charity shop donations and the insults about the quality of the goods means I will not be going out of my way to donate to them in the future.

OP posts:
strawberriesaregood · 21/01/2018 17:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

k2p2k2tog · 21/01/2018 17:33

The charity shop that did the sniffy "we're currently too full to accept new donations" has never had a donation from me since.

it's not sniffy, it's practical. On occasion there is SO much stuff in the back shop that we literally cannot move and are falling over each other. It's not "sniffy". It's recognising that you sometimes have to call a halt until you get to the bottom of what you've got.

The quality of donations we get through the year are fairly good on average, lots of lovely clothes, homeware and jewellery. But post-Christmas seems to be a particular problem with people clearing out old stuff to make was for new gifts and donating stuff which really is only fit for the bin.

We also send stuff away to be recycled - clothes, shoes, bags. But the courier man only comes once a week and didn't come at all last week because of the snow. When i'm sorting I can easily fill perhaps 15 bin bags over a 4 hour period. Maybe more. And there are other sorters doing the same - say 30 bags a morning. 60 a day. Pushing 450 bin bags a week. It's easy to see how it gets out of hand. We also use one of the large dumpster bins with non-recyclable rubbish which gets emptied twice a week and it's always full.

melj1213 · 21/01/2018 17:33

Lovesagain a lot of charities do try to redistribute items they can't sell, but all of those decisions cost - either in time or money - so many larger charities try to keep their redistribution in-house so that any money generated still goes to the charity.

Even selling damaged/unsellable clothing items to the rag man costs volunteers time as they have to sort through any donations to separate store saleable items from items that are only good for rags. Also, whilst they are storing items for the rag man that stuff is taking up time and space that could be used for things that are going to get the charity more money ... a kilo of rags is going to make the charity some money, but not as much as a kilo's worth of saleable clothes.

Many of the larger charity shops will have central distribution hubs, so if one shop gets a lot of clothes but no toys they can send their excess clothes through the hub to be sent to a store that gets no clothes donated ... they can then receive toys from a store that gets lots of those but not many books etc etc. That way the charity is still selling the items and so ultimately still raising the funds they need.

Smaller/independent charities don't have this country wide network to tap into so they have to redistribute on a smaller, community level. One of the charity shops my friend volunteers in regularly donates extra clothing items to local women and childrens shelters, they donate good quality toys to community play groups and youth schemes, good quality books get offered to day centres and school libraries etc. That way they not only get to redistribute their donations to the wider community but also means they keep their costs down because for every (good quality just for some reason not selling) book they donate to a school library, it is one less book they have to pay to dispose of.

PricillaQueenOfTheDesert · 21/01/2018 17:34

Oh please get over yourself love!

You come across as if your shit is something we should all be grateful for. Let’s be honest, it was some clothes/books etc that only you like.

God forbid those poor buggers that actually work for free tell you to fuck off with your discarded shit.

roundaboutthetown · 21/01/2018 17:34

I'm not a charity worker, I just think it's utterly pathetic to decide never to give to a charity ever again because someone said their shop was closed and could you go to another shop they even named for you that was still open.

cantkeepawayforever · 21/01/2018 17:35

Of course I give things to charity that I would like to keep. I give money by Giftaid every month. After a specific disaster or issue or appeal I will go out of my way to find either things that can be sold to raise extra money, or things that are needed by that charity at that moment (e.g. recent appeal by local charity for new baby clothes). Food banks, as well.

That's surely the point? To help the specific charity in the best way possible to respond to their needs at the moment? Not to demand that they must take what I want to given them, when I want to give them, and when they're shut?

roundaboutthetown · 21/01/2018 17:37

It's not as if anyone sorting their own stuff out and deciding what to keep and what to chuck doesn't understand what a time consuming pain in the arse it is. If a volunteer therefore isn't always capable of being polite to me when I giventhem more stuff to sort out, I don't then strop off and throw everything into landfill.

Original poster
Bearbehind · 21/01/2018 17:37

Im not a charity worker, I just think it's utterly pathetic to decide never to give to a charity ever again because someone said their shop was closed and could you go to another shop they even named for you that was still open

roundabout it's not the charity shop in question that has made me decide not to donate in future

It's you and your cohorts who have insulted all donations and made everyone who donates feel like shit for bothering.

Well done you.

OP posts:
cantkeepawayforever · 21/01/2018 17:39

Is there genuinely no space for this stuff in your car / house until the next time a local charity shop is open? It does seem rather excessive to say it has to go into the rubbish when, presumably, it's already in your car and ready to go?

Aridane · 21/01/2018 17:39

Having read this thread and the contempt showN, I’m not inclined to stuff to the charity shop in the future.

roundaboutthetown · 21/01/2018 17:40

Well done tou, Bearbehind for justifying your selfishness to yourself. It's no more skin off my nose than yours if we drown in unrecycled rubbish left by people who offend far too easily.

melj1213 · 21/01/2018 17:40

Name me one person who says, I want to support a charity so I'll give them things I'd prefer to keep?

That's not what I said.

There is a difference between donating to a specific charity because you want to get rid of things and they are convenient; and taking your unwanted items to a shop because you want to support the charity by raising money for their specific cause via your donation.

k2p2k2tog · 21/01/2018 17:40

Nobody has insulted all donations.

Those of us who do volunteer have said that not every bag is filled to the brim with amazing stuff and for every bag filled with freshly laundered Hobbs and Boden you have to go through 15 with odd socks and knickers. That's not mean or nasty. It's the truth. And it is an issue which appears to be particularly acute at this time of year.

MrsChumleyWarner · 21/01/2018 17:42

Wow you have been given a really hard time on here.

I personally would’t go back to that particular charity shop.

You can join freecycle and someone will call round and take it away. Please don’t bin it. Or put it outside a different charity shop just before they open in the morning. Or check out supermarket car parks a lot have collection points where you can drop your stuff off - big metal containers with a delivery chute.

SchrodingersFrilledLizard · 21/01/2018 17:42

YABU. The charity shop was closed and therefore it was not possible to take your donation.