How do you deal with huge fuck ups

[Ducktalesooooh]

So I've made a huge mistake at work. Completely non intentional and more a lapse of judgement but it comes at the end of a bad few weeks handling a difficult project that didn't go well. Not all my fault but my reputation is dented.

Add to it this latest fuck up and I'm just a huge ball of anxiety today. I can't think straight, feel sick and am dreading work so much I'm even considering handing in my notice.

So I need some strategies on how to get through this. I have no perspective right now. How do you deal with things when you've totally messed up?

OP if someone at a team meeting said "guys I
Made a massive fuck up, it was my fault and I'm sorry" I would have massive respect for them. Most folk pass the buck. If you rarely make a mistake and you've had a hard time then I'd be more than willing to accept it and move on.

Take in cakes! And coffee too if you can carry it. Tell everyone at once it's because you were a muppet and fucked up. Own it, apologise, move on.

There is wise advice on here - I have nothing more to add than we all make mistakes at one point and it's how we handle our failures that shows others what we are made of.
A mistake is an opportunity to learn and grow - no one is perfect. You've beaten yourself up enough about this. All the best for tomorrow.

It's horrible, isn't it? I did something (or actually, like you, didn't do something) that then led to a whole ball of fun .

Just act normally. Everyone will know but you don't need to go over it / apologise, you have already done that with your LM.

If anyone asks about it be honest. Good luck - I had a crap day when it happened but the next day I just thought 'today cannot be as bad!' And it wasn't

^
All of the above.
Take ownership, apologise, be open with your boss, kick yourself a little & take action to ensure it doesn't happen again.
Errors and fuck-ups happen. More often we are judged on how we deal with them.
(we had a major f-up at work recently which cost business £100k....people were surprisingly accepting)

Own up to the mistake and apologise. We all make mistakes and I have seen people getting into more trouble by not owning up to it than the actual mistake made. Honesty is the best policy.
I wouldn’t take in cakes, you don’t want to be seen sucking up

I agree with the idea about processes. It seems a bit worrying that something that bad can happen just because something slipped your mind. Think of suggestions about how this can be avoided in future.

I’d take responsibility but not over apologise.

We’ve all made mistakes. Good luck for tomorrow.

I think you need to hold your head up and carry on as usual. Obviously you need to have a conversation with someone - your manager or whatever, but I doubt you owe any explanation to the rest of your team. Learn from it, reflect on it, make sure it won't happen again. Make sure your manager knows that you have learned from it. It will be ok

When I’ve. Been responsible for team selection to do a project or something, I always take ‚‘how someone handles their own fuck up‘ as a major test of wether I want them onboard or not.

Top tips from my amazing old boss:
Quietly but firmly own it
No histrionics, no self flagellation, don’t go on about it.
Most mistakes get made because a system or cultural failure allowed it to happen. Don’t play a blame game, but if you can be part f the procAnd only a man could think that being a woman is nothing more than putting on a frock and sling backs.ess that fixes the loophole then do it.

So in your example if you are a museum curator who spotted a ming vase balanced on the edge of a shelf and thought ‚‘I must move that‘ then got called away and forgot. ok well, yes you should have, but why wasn’t there a audit system for checking daily that all the Ming vases were in cabinets? Why did it fall down to one busy person to spot it and move it. That is asking for trouble. That kind of system will always fail eventually, it is just a quest of how soon and how badly.

And my awesome boss? He once made an error on a contract and effectively gave away a £35k piece of kit to one of our clients. It was stuff of legend at our company but he ended up with a promotion out of it in a way, he introduced a better system of checking contracts, which meant it couldn’t happen again.

And I’ve just fucked up that one with a random chunk of a post I read last night. WTF?

Will everyone know what's happened and what you've done/not done? Is Monday the first time you will have seen them since it's happened? Is it something that will directly impact lots of the other workers?

If it's all still being dealt with by management, I would probably avoid saying too much to other people until it has all been formally discussed and sorted.

A brief aclknowledgement, that somethings happened and it's difficult and you're sorry wouldn't go amiss. Avoiding getting drawn into gossip, speculation and nosy questions by others is good. It helps to be able to say that the boss is looking into it all and until that's all finished, you shouldn't say too much, but acknowledge something has gone wrong, and you're sorry for the impact of it, and finding it difficult yourself.

It all depends on how much others know, and if it has a direct impact on them and how serious really.

Yes, it would be a good idea to see the manager first thing or even to email today. Again, voice regret at what's happened and take responsibility if it clearly was your fault. Say that you know colleagues will be interested in what has happened (if you are uncertain about what they know, you could say this and ask, so that you know how to behave, and ask if there is anything the manager would like you to say or not say to the other colleagues, so you know how to handle being in the office. That way, you ar taking the lead from them and accepting their authority over the matter, which is a responsible way to handle it. Finish by expressing further regret and desire to co-operate in the next stages. Perhaps ask if they would like you to come and see them first thing in the morning, or if you feel it would help, ask if you can pop in before work starts to discuss how they want you to handle colleagues.

It's hard to keep perspective with these things and it can feel totally out of control. If you email your Boss today with these kind of things, you are starting to take a bit of control back about it all and I think this will make you feel better. After the first day, that huge uncertainty about other people will pass. You just have to get past that day and gathering some info by emailing/meeting your boss will help with that.

Don't panic, see what you can salvage estimate what it would take to put it right, cost time and the right people and build it into a proposal.After many years contracting to put stuff right there is something fundamentally wrong with British businesses its rarely one person's fault.

Just apologise and then stick it in the Fuck It Bucket and go back to normal. I guarantee you’ve punished yourself more than anybody else will and you’ve probably made it into something bigger in your head than it really is. You didn’t press the big red button or send out the warning of Armageddon. If Something got broken, there will be insurance.

I worked with a girl who was temping and was asked to print something out for the boss. She accidentally printed out a payroll list showing the pay of every single senior manager and head of the (large) organisation. Even worse, the person before her to use the printer got it jammed so nothing printed. She assumed it was wiped and went home.

Next day someone else had cleared the jam and it printed out and was lying on the side in the office. Everyone had a good look at how much their bosses and office management were paid.

Was your cock up as bad as this? Bet not! She kept her job, it was big news for a week and dented her reputation for a bit but everyone quickly forgot and she went on to get a permanent job there.

I cocked up the other day, I managed to destroy some quite important paperwork. I held my hands up and all was sorted (thank goodness it was reprintable)

Everyone laughed and said what a dingbat I was and mistakes happen!

Yeah, people bring it up and we all laugh about it but I know I won't do it again so lesson very much learned

How are you OP? Was Monday ok?

All you can do is own it. You've admitted you fucked up, don't make excuses and donwhatbit takes to make it right .

Everyone makes mistakes it's how you deal with them that counts.

I have far more respect for some one owing it, and it actually shows your honest and you take responsibility for things which are good quality's in a person and employee.

Eveyone makes mistakes! Including your colleagues so they will understand. You did the right thing fessing up. Best thing is just to go in as normal but be prepared to take responsibility if it comes up and plan to ensure the same mistake doesn't happen again. Promise you, it will pass and im awhile no one will even remember!

I’ve had some nasty fuck ups.

I analysed it- where did I go wrong? I confessed to who I needed to- explaining where I went wrong. I learned from it and arranged additional training to avoid making the same future fuck ups then continued to get stuck into it to avoid getting anxiety around it in future.

You have to own it

Own your mistake. Say what you can learn from it and how you can avoid it in future. Say how you can put it right - if applicable. Ask for extra training if you think this may hgelp. Apologise and move on. Say what you think went well/ask your manager what they think went well.

We all make mistakes, we're human so try to stop stressing yourself.
I kind of do as follows:
Own up, take responsibility.
Apologise and try to make right/fix it.
Put it in the fuck it bucket
Move on
Learn from it.

According to MN anyone in a job who makes a mistake that would effect anyone who spoke to them is massively unprofessional, should be fired or hanged, and have their entire life ruined over social media because they f**ked up one time.

Admit your mistake, work out what lead to it - bad training, poor work environment, just having a moment of being a moron, etc etc - then strive to correct it and resassure anyone involved it shouldn't be repeated.

best of luck xx

My mum is very very senior in her field and she gave me the best career advice I have had in terms of mistakes. She said “own it, apologise sincerely, ONCE”. There is no need to grovel, and overcompensate. You apologise once,own it, take responsibility and ownership of fixing the issue and show that you have taken steps to ensure it won’t happen again. Then move on. Do not let it undermine the rest of your work and don’t dwell on it.

During my working life I have been on all sides of this. I’ve made mistakes as a worker, been a boss and had to be responsible for other people’s mistakes and a business owner who's lost business because of worker's fuck-ups.

I will honestly tell you that for me it is how the mistaker maker reacts when they make the mistake. I remember one young lad was horrified when he made a major error and even though I was worried sick how to fix it I found myself calming him down. He was a brilliant worker normally and that made the difference.

As a business owner I had an employee who made several major mistakes because they were careless and had a ‘don’t give a shit’ attitude. After making a mistake they would always deny it was their fault and not cooperate in trying to undo the mistake or finding a solution.

I sit here, after 20 years still regretting not firing them before they did the damage they eventually did to my company.

You sound like someone I would have loved to work with. Bless your heart.