Why is it so difficult to get MH help for teenagers?

[ihatethecold]

AIBU. If my dd had a broken arm the health service would fix it.
They wouldn’t say we will try help you but it willl take 6 months, sorry about that. Or if you have money you can try find and find the help yourself.

It’s so frustrating. 18 week wait to get an assessment, the school won’t do an educational psychologist assessment until she has been seen by Camhs.
We are 10 weeks into the GP referral.

My dd is not getting any better, every day we are sticking a plaster on her mh issues.

This has been our life for over a year now. My poor DD is so tired.
It’s heartbreaking that kids are not being treated very quickly. 😔

The best thing would be to pay for a therapist if you can afford it. Make sure they are properly trained and have all the qualifications.

My mum has been a high school teacher for 25 years and is retraining as a counsellor / therapist as a retirement job. She will be qualified to counsel teenagers next year, but not yet. Sorry!

We have paid for my dd to see a counsellor privately since July.
This does help but it’s not the solution.
I want to ask the School if my dd can go part time. I don’t really know how to go about it.
We communicate efficiently with the school but I really don’t think the HOY understands how severe anxiety works.
She emailed today to say my dd picking her options will be a good distraction and will take her mind of things.
Wtaf????

My Ds is on his 4th consultant in 14 months so every appointment is like 3 steps back . I have to go everything again . Had he had the same consultant I am sure we would be further foreword . I also agree with the crisis issue . I stood in Camhs reception and cried ( not my proudest moment ) but was told no appointment for 2 months as consultant had left . Head phoned and spoke to care co ordinatar and told he my Ds had twice put his life in danger and considered it to be a safeguarding concern he was seen 3 days later

I took my DD out of school for a couple of years and home educated her because of her mental health. When I sent in the deregistration letter they offered us part time schooling, but DD didn't want it. She was just before her GCSEs and it's made pretty much no difference at all academically but she's a completely different person mental health wise. We'd got to the stage where the academic stuff just wasn't a priority though, I thought if we didn't get the mental health sorted it could affect her for the rest of her life. We got reduced price counselling through a local youth centre as GP reluctant to refer through CAMHS, but actually being out of a toxic (friendships-wise) situation and making new friends along with a lot of support from me was really important too.

I have told my dd that she can be Home Schooled. I’m more than happy to help her.
But she doesn’t want to leave school, she says she wants to be there but feel ok.
Even though the school building terrifies her she still wants to be there.

OP I feel for you and your DS.
My DS had severe anxiety and we also had to wait for CAMHS. Once she got seen they were amazing and made the world of difference to her.
I felt desperate when I was waiting and said exactly the same - if she had a broken arm, they wouldn't make her wait for months. While we were waiting I got a child's book on CBT which somewhat helped (not talking about the anxiety all day, but only allocate 15 minutes each day when you talk about it).

It's so terrible that while there is a greater understanding about mental health issues, there seem to be less and less provisions dealing with it.
And I agree with other posters - it's the Tories' fault as with other NHS provisions too.
Their motto is : underfund, criticise, privatise.

I wish you and your DS a lot of strength and hope she will get the help she deserves to get.

YANBU Dd got an appointment through this week, it's for the middle of May. I asked school to refer her in October and referral was refused, GP referred her in December, CAMHS decided she didn't need urgent support without even seeing her so gave her a date six months after second referral.
I asked for a referral when I could see the anxiety in school was problematic now she's paralysed by anxiety and not in school and we still have four months to wait.
It's awful, school won't refer to educational welfare because they know I'm being pro active and I contacted them myself and they weren't interested but without CAMHS involvement we won't get any out of school education.
Currently battling the LA to get them to reassess dd but they are ignoring their statutory duty so there is no movement anywhere.

Tbh though it was similar in end of 90s under labour when I was very mentally ill.

i don't think it's just down to which government is in power. Mental health has never had the same status as physical health. There is also so much more understanding about mental health and it must be hard to keep up with.
Also, for SOME they don't have an innate MH problem but are going through a difficult time for which they do need support but, I would imagine, at the cost of someone with an ongoing potentially longer term problem.

Our own experience of CAMHS was pretty poor but we were fortunate enough to be able to afford a private psychologist. I do believe that DS would have sunk a lot further had we not been in that position and I really feel for those whose only choice is CAMHS. DS had to go through 3 appointments with different people repeating the same story before we even saw a psychiatrist. That alone caused him further trauma.

My 14 year old is under CAHMS after fighting since she was 8! So far, nothing has been done despite being with them for a year now. We went back to the GP today to be told there's nothing she can do, and if DD feels suicidal to go to A and E. It's so shit.

Because this government has cut funding for things like this to the bone OP. That's the reality of austerity that so many people voted for. I think they thought it would only affect other people, not them. But now it bites everyone.

Not saying it's your fault OP - just a bit of a rant

I hope you can access some help soon

LAs won't necessarily accept a private ed psych report

THere is underfunding and service cuts. This is compounded by a lack of staff and psychiatry being a really hard area to recruit to. Pay is no better than adult psychiatry but training is longer. There is minimal opportunity to boost salary with private work.

We've been through the CAMHS system with DS1 a few years ago (he's 12). Their actual process once he was seen was quick enough but the 56 week wait was ridiculous and the fact that his behaviour deteriorated hugely during that time was, in part, down to the fact that there was no support in place for him. I genuinely believe he was on his way to a complete breakdown at that point.

The support he now accesses is paid for privately by us. If we couldn't afford private help he'd still be falling apart at the seams.

It's terrifying that the provision for MH is so underfunded and I think the current situation could lead to an absolute breakdown in our MH service in ten years time because without support and help these teens will become adults whose MH issues haven't even begun to be identified, supported or resolved.

My son has MH issues, exacerbated by his ASD. He gets nothing, no help from anywhere, because services bounce you from pillar to post because nobody wants to have to take responsibility for the ten year old who says he wants to die.

It’s utterly shit, and I’m sorry your child is suffering too

For what ever reason there are massively more and more people, teenagers included, that have MH problems and wanting medical help. Just saying the state should pay for everything for everybody wont solve the problem. Society has to take most lot of the responsibility.

If it was my child I would be doing everything to get help privately.

Because everyone can afford private care that should be covered by the NHS Julie, especially for children who have multiple agency involvement.

I’d love to go private for my son. I can’t. The cost is too high, monetarily and in ways not linked to my bank account. Private assessments and so on are more often not recognised by other agencies. I know my son has PDA, and possibly SPD. The local PCT doesn’t diagnose those things because they cost too much, so that means they don’t treat for them either. Not even with a diagnosis from another NHS trust, or from a private educational psychologist.

You can’t win, and that’s because the system is broken.

Our children shouldn’t have to languish like this, but they do, and fools like you telling people to just go private are part of the bloody problem.

This post is so relevant to me.
My son is 15... severe anxiety and panic attacks for about 18months... finally got a camhs referral after a suicide attempt and thoughts.
The appointment is later this week.... he's not been to school since Xmas as the anxiety is so bad..., today he did an hour which was a massive achievement!
I'd love to know of support groups for us too if anyone can help

Dd has had an autism diagnosis since she was two. CAMHS don't consider the anxiety that is a huge problem currently to be separate to the autism and consider autism a learning disability which moves her out of their remit. Learning disability services don't consider her to fit their remit because despite the autism she has a normal IQ and children's services don't consider her a child with a disability as she only has autism and it isn't considered a qualifying disability on its own.
Nobody considers themselves responsible for offering support at all and dd gets worse and worse all the time.

Bloody hell flesh That’s dreadful.

I’ve had a long by chat with my SIL this evening. She is a child psychologist so she could give me specific advice on where to contact so we can get a referral done privately.
My DH has also sent a response to the HOY, I was too cross and disappointed to do it today. I don’t want to ruin the good relationship we have through frustration.
We have requested that she’s allowed to come in later on days she feels anxious without penalty.
I got another attendance letter today 😡
So unhelpful.

Ihate it's all shit. School are too worried about my reaction to start on about her attendance. She hasn't been since before Christmas because she couldn't get out of bed because of anxiety for the couple of days before term started. Tbh I've told her we are stopping trying to go to school because I feared a complete breakdown and I'm seeing her becoming more herself slowly because school has stopped.
I'm fighting the LA now forcing them to reassess because at least I have that recourse open to me because of the statement/EHCP. Trouble is LA stall and squirm and so it's another drawn out battle.
By the time dd is seen by CAMHS it will be a full year that dd has been struggling and I have been trying to get her help.

My oldest DS was like Aml DC seen within 24hrs but he was very ill afte ending up in a HDU from a suicide attempt and that was the only point he got help. So unfortntly there is a long list, but atleast there are still some children how get help quickly but this only happens when there at risk of killing someone else or have tried to kill themselves. My DS has still had appaling treatment- i currently have a thread in child mental helath about his treatment. Hes just come out of a mental helath unit having been on section - 6 weeks ago and has seeen his worker.... twice, hes been sectioned under a 136 (police) twice after this and still nothing.
Children are left to get to crisis point and this shouldnt happen, this is how lives are lost

Such sad, desperate stories.
😔
for all you lovely parents going through this.

Just saying the state should pay for everything for everybody wont solve the problem. Society has to take most lot of the responsibility. If it was my child I would be doing everything to get help privately.

Really Julie? If you couldn’t afford to pay for private treatment, what exactly would you do?

We've been through the CAMHS system with DS1 a few years ago (he's 12). Their actual process once he was seen was quick enough but the 56 week wait was ridiculous

FIFTY-SIX WEEKS. Do you actually think that’s acceptable in a supposedly first-world country, Julie?