To not know what to DO with my children?

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Feeling like a shit mum lately. Can I say it without being jumped on? I love it when they don’t need anything more than my physical being. When they play together or even alone.

I don’t know how to keep them entertained. I don’t know how to make up games or role play.

The iPads, phones and TVs are definitely over used!

They are 4 and 2.5.

I’m not even sure what I’m asking. Am I alone with this one?

I can't imagine our ancestors had much time for role play so don't worry too much. They have each other to play with.

Mine are a similar age. We do a lot of crafts/Lego but obviously the younger one gets in the way and theeldest refuses to do anything alone. I am seriously considering just getting a nanny so that I don't have to do it. It's fun when it just me and one or the other of them but when there are two of them I can't do anything because the youngest isn't interest in the stuff the older one wants to do and the oldest isn't interest in what the youngest wants to do. I am actually rather quite starting to resent the older one at time for being so unreasonably clingly. I love him obviously but I wish that he was less annoying.

Yanbu I find it really really hard to keep my ds entertained. He is only 18months old! He is such an active boy and has always been. He started crawling at 5 months, and was walking at 10months so he is just a Busy, busy boy. He gets bored so easily and I just cannot do anymore to keep him busy.
He is already playing with 3yr toys and grasps the concepts. We have done classes, activities and so much. He plays alone as well but he does that for a little while and is bored. I've started him in Montessori and wow what a difference. He is so stimulated and is learning and when he gets home hes actually tired.
I always wonder how on earth people keep their kids home till 4, what do they do with them.
Sorry for going off topic but just wanted to say I get you. Not everyone is into role play.

I am currently sat next to my 6 and 2 year old who both have their noses firmly pressed against their ipads. I struggle in the holidays too, especially as a single parent. I find their ages make certain activities alone impossible (plus my 2 year old dd is incredibly strong willed/stroppy/stubborn).

I do make time every day to play with them, to stop the guilt i feel about the amount of screen time they have. We play hide and seek, colouring, tag, tickles, board games, cake baking etc. I try to give them around an hour in the evenings after school and nursery. Weekends it's swimming, park, library or day out. Sundays we visit family. They both love lazy days though where we watch films and play computer games all day in our pyjamas.

If they are happy, try not to worry about it to much. Parenting is hard at the best of times without adding unnecessary guilt into the equation.

Let them do some creative play. Like pp said, give them a chalk to draw out side. That's what my ds did for ages. Or get tons of bricks/train sets/legos/dolls house/ art materials/beads. We got loads from charity shops enough not to run out of any parts/pieces. Encourage them to draw/cut/ colour etc.

Searches memory, what we did:

Swimming once pw;
Library;
Outside every day - park, NT place etc.
Trips - Science museum building blocks area (don't know if it still exists) popular at 4, also art and craft sessions in museums and galleries.
Playing shops at home - get the pasta, tins etc. out and some play / real money
Playing buses - rearranging all the dining room chairs
Cooking - baking cakes, decorating biscuits, washing and stuffing trout (the feel of the fish, cutting mushrooms, wrapping it up in foil)
Drawing, painting, clay work.
Put on some music and dance.
Read - every day, even if they are in childcare (when you are home, reading punctuates the day)
Gardening - digging, grow a sunflower etc., water plants.
Playdates.

Not forgetting - lego (I don't think a day went by when I didn't have lego embedded in my foot) and brio.

I would put away iPads for that age. Tv is ok as it doesn’t have the same affect.
Go out every day. Go to a group or wrap warm and go for walks, to the park and feed the ducks.
Libraries and museums usually have activities.
At home get paper, pens and paint palettes each. I found they got annoyed sharing at that age. The pound shop usually has stickers for quite cheap which kids seem to love.

We don't have screens during the week because it was getting out of control. I was dreading it but was amazed at how quickly the kids actually started finding their own entertainments.

I also did a massive clear out of their toys leaving them with a fraction of what they had before. They are now much better at finding something to play with because they aren't so overwhelmed by the volume.

I don't sit and play with them but suggest an activity they can do around where I am which means they have independence and I can get on with things but I am on hand to ooh and aah at what they make and do.

Im not so great at the whole mum thing either.
I have toddlers 4 and 3
we go on bear hunts to the local park, wellies when its damp and well wrapped up.
I rotate toys.
We have colouring in at the table.
Junk modeling currently the large boxes left over from christmas are jet packs.

On days that I struggled with my kids st that age, I just drew up a checklist and treated it as tasks I could tick off.
Things like
Get outside
Table activity
‘Fun’ active game like tickling or hug monster or dancing to music
Reading
Cuddles
As long as I could tick those off, I felt I’d done a good job.

Obviously if I was really struggling or felt unwell, then a day watching tv isn’t going to do any harm in the long run.

OP I struggle with this too. I try to organise meeting with one of her friends and work around that. Stickers too

I always find a planned activity "let's bake some cake" or "how about we do some painting" can quickly go stale with DD wandering off to do something else leaving me to finish the cake / clean up the mess etc.. A planned hours fun together become 5 mins of me nagging followed by 55 min of me being tied up tidying away the mess whilst she moans for me to put the telly on for her!

To be fair she is 7 so some of her play has advanced but she still hates jigsaws and isn't keen on board games.

So whilst we do still do those things the activities I find better for us are:

1. Have a bath together. For some reason this never fails to allow us quality time to giggle.
2. Go back to bed. She loves to come and lie with me in my bed in the middle of the day in our jammies and either read a book or look at one of her magazines or do some drawing. There is no self interest involved here at all
3. Lego. We NEVER build anything. We always start but within 5 minutes she finds one of the other little toys in the lego box or the lego people and starts some sort of other silly game (last night I ended up being fart monster with a larger toy that had found it's way into the box and was trying to kill the lego people with my super fart powers). As long as I suspend my adult brain I can giggle along too.
4. Playdough - see lego OR we make blobby men and then make little videos of them doing stuff on my phone (we have a Mr potato man playdough set so stick noses, eyes, ears, etc.. into a blob of playdough).
5. Cutting and sticking with old magazines.
6. Wellies, water and a stick on a fine day are all we need. We go off to any and all local country parks and chuck sticks in rivers.
7. A tray of lentils and pots / spoons / funnels / brushes from the kitchen to play with them.
8. A tray of water - see lentils.
9. Building towers of blocks and knocking them down - normally whilst lego men dive from the heights screaming

Mine is an only so her playmate is often me (although she does play alone pretty well these days). I have to stop being mum and join in and do my own painting or make a playdough blob man or pour lentils too. Once she starts her own little game with voices and whatnot I am free to go off and make a cup of tea and give her 10mins before I hear "muuuuuummmmm"

You sound like a lovely fun Mum @Cath2907

Today I went to a toddler group with my dd but sometimes I wonder if she's bored of them and doesn't really enjoy them any more, she just seems to wander about getting annoyed with other children , so I spend the whole time following her making sure she was being kind.

We had a fun afternoon though of playing pirates and reading books (she rarely wants to read books with me except at bedtime and I relish it when she does!), played "babies" (so boring 😩), and she also "helped" me with dinner by chopping some banana and blueberries.

Had a better night with the baby last night which really helps me not just stick on the telly.

I'm really craving lighter afternoons and warmer weather, my dd really feels the cold and refuses to wear hats or gloves so most walks just end with her whinging.

Pigs in Pants! They will find it the funniest thing they've ever played. You play on the same team as the 2 year old, against the 4 year old.

Other Orchard Valley games are also excellent, but this one is a particular favourite.

And definitely get them doing normal everyday things with you: cooking, cleaning, shopping etc. It'll take longer, but it's important.

Pigs in Pants! They will find it the funniest thing they've ever played. You play on the same team as the 2 year old, against the 4 year old.

Other Orchard Valley games are also excellent, but this one is a particular favourite.

It's really tough amusing little ones. I had an amazing book called 365 things to do with toddlers , or something like that. and it was a real godsend. Had loads of easy cheap fun everyday things in it to keep them amused at home that I wouldn't have thought of doing myself.

It takes a bit of forward planning, but my boys love this activity and it keeps them quiet for ages...

theimaginationtree.com/frozen-dinosaur-eggs-sensory-play/

If you follow the Imagination Tree on Facebook there are lots of good ideas. Some of them are a bit of a faff, but they do tend to generate a decent spell of independent play.

We used to make snakes out of play do and feed them.
Also created our own sweets using play do. Also had a pretend cafe where she mainly sold ice cream. I used to wind her up by ordering sausage ice cream 🤣
I got a pop up tent and filled it with balls. They usually ended up outside the tent
When i wasnt being depressed we had fun. When i was depressed the dvds were on too much. Do what you can x

What do you like doing? I used to enjoy getting out and about, doing colouring or drawing with them, building Duplo or Lego, reading to them, making a brio layout, singing and jigsaws. I also did other stuff of course, but it helps if you like some of the stuff you're doing in a day!