To ask how to prepare DD for high school?

[AllRoadsLeadBackToRadley]

First of all, I'm aware it's 9 months away, but I'm worried already!

The facts:

Not one of her friends are going to the same school. We've recently moved, and, although her current school is still in our catchment area (nearest C of E school), all the high schools her friends are going to actually aren't.

We've moved to a three-tier area, so most people who start the year in Sept will have been there for a few years already (it'll be middle school...I know the title says high school. I'm even confusing myself!)

I've alreasy got her into guides in the new area, an I'm hoping she'll make a few friends there who will go to her new school.

Can I do anything else?

Join a club locally now so she has a chance to meet a few people who will be at her new school. Even if they are not in the same year, they will still be a friendly face around.

Placemarking although dc1 is only currently year 5! He does struggle sometimes friendship wise, best friend will not be going to same high school and he will also be going to a very large school

I agree with the joining a group idea. Also, there's a school bus from this area to her first choice of middle school. That will hopefully help with the social aspect, too.

fresh nervewrecking, isn't it? 😃

Yes! Would have been much easier if his bf was going to the same school. I hope that the kids who have been unpleasent to him at current school go elsewhere or at least are not in his class.

Afreshcuppa, if you speak to your DS''s class teacher she/he can ask the head of year at high school to make sure your DS is not placed in the same tutor group as a particular child. When I was a Y6 teacher the high schools would always ask if there were any children from my class I thought should be separated or kept together at high school.

Ah thats good. Will look at that next year! Our primary kids go to 3 secondary schools so i am hopeful atleast some of the horrible ones go elsewhere. There hasnt been any bullying as such they are just arogant and cocky, my ds is bit of sensitive soul

Practise the bus journey with her over the summer. Several times! Make sure she knows where to get on, and off, and what to do if things go wrong.

As it's middle school she will be assigned a buddy. This helps to meet new friends in already established groups. My DD often looks after new girls and she has made long lasting friends this way as her group are really inclusive.
Another good thing for starting a new school where no one knows you is you can reinvent yourself a little without others outing you. It also forces you out of your comfort zone and is good preparation for starting new clubs etc and later in life with jobs.

My DD stared senior school and only knew the primary school queen bee so she was never going to be included in her group - queen bee made that quite clear. I pepped talked her every night and encouraged her to smile and give eye contact to anyone who made any effort with her. She said one girl would always say good morning to her so after 3 days of this I suggested she ask this girl to introduce her to her friends so she did and she joined a lovely group of girls who she was very close with for years 7 and 8. Now Year 9 and studying GCSEs she has moved to classes without most of these girls (I said not to choose subjects just because your friends are) and she has had to make new friends but again has a lovely group and still sees the other group at break times.

I bought a couple of books online to encourage confidence in pre teens and teens and read them with her.

Such brilliant advice! Not sure about doing the route, as it's a school bus...but she has a sort of advantage here. She's used to- and has been for a number of years- having to tell me where we are, where to get off the bus, etc, so she's developed a very good sense of direction. Both of them have, actually! DS (6) saw a picture of a mobile phone repair store on GM the other day, and said "Mommy, that's down the road from your work, and the bus station is that way!" 😃