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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask you, how remote an area would you be happy to live in?

27 replies

CheapSausagesAndSpam · 15/01/2018 00:09

Reason is this...DH and I live in Australia with our two DC.

Next year, we;ll be able to buy a property. We're not young...both 44.

We currently live in a rented house in a very beautiful and desirable area...45 mins from the central business district...our DC attend school here and we love it.

It's semi rural...all the charm of the countryside but with amenities very close...so it is expensive.

Now....we went yesterday to drop off one of our DC at a sleepover party. The area was 50 minutes drive away...(here in Oz that's not shocking at all) the family in question have lived there, making the big drive to and from school for three years.

It was BEAUTIFUL.

An absolutely gorgeous area...but pretty remote.

There house was hidden in woodland...the sea was close by...there was a general store abou two miles away and a church.

Property there we realise is CHEAP. I'm talking CHEAP.

Obviously because of the remote factor.

In terms of work, DH has indicated that he'd be happy to make the commute ...I work from home.

The children...well...they'd manage I'm sure. They could have a pony....friends could come home with them from school on Fridays or they could stay in town with their friends if they wanted.

I'm just trying to think about it and would like your opinions and thoughts.

I said to DH "what if we get infirm?" and he said we'd move somewhere smaller...somewhere with no land to care for and closer to pharmacies and all that.

The doctor would be about a 30 minute drive from the area I'm looking at as there's another smaller town than the one we currently live in, in the other direction.

I'm very much a homebody and unafraid of being alone for long stretches. DH loves gardening and would love to have more land.

OP posts:
SavageBeauty73 · 15/01/2018 00:20

Too remote for me but I'm a Londoner so wrong person to post 😄

DriggleDraggle · 15/01/2018 00:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Deshasafraisy · 15/01/2018 00:23

Sounds idyllic- I would.

Original poster
CheapSausagesAndSpam · 15/01/2018 00:25

I've said if we win the lottery or make a load of money, we can also buy a flat in the city for those weekends when we need company Grin or to go to the theatre...also would be good for DC when they're adults.

Chances of enough cash for that are low but hey....if you don't ever imagine anything like that then how can anything like that happen for real!

OP posts:
Original poster
CheapSausagesAndSpam · 15/01/2018 00:27

I suppose I'm looking for people to point out diffculties I might have missed...

OP posts:
DianaPrincessOfThemyscira · 15/01/2018 00:29

I’d have to be within 15 minutes of a major supermarket and corner shop and preferably within half an hour of the city centre. I couldn’t live remote.

DonnyAndVladSittingInATree · 15/01/2018 00:31

I would cope very badly I’m afraid. I grew up in the the sticks and so should be very used to it but I get antsy just visiting my parents who are a 3 minute drive to the nearest town. The countryside is beautiful and in my dreams I would live in a big country estate with all sorts of animals but in reality I would feel very isolated and become depressed very quickly. Unless I was travelling to work in the city/with lots of people everyday. Which you aren’t but you may be ok with that.

DonnyAndVladSittingInATree · 15/01/2018 00:32

I need to see people every day or I get very quickly depressed. I’m just now coming out of a xmas slump.

Original poster
CheapSausagesAndSpam · 15/01/2018 00:34

Donny yes...I like nothing better than having nowhere to go Grin I do like the odd night out or dinner party...by odd I mean about once every two months.

Our friends are great and I know they'd like to come down for a visit and would stay the night if we asked them to dinner....they'd all enjoy that I reckon.

OP posts:
CheshireChat · 15/01/2018 00:34

Also, young kids will probably love it, but once they hit teenage years they will need ferrying about.

How isolated would you be in practical terms- would it mean you'll struggle to go to activities and the like? How about schools?

I'm probably biased as I've sworn I'll never live anywhere isolated again in my life.

Argeles · 15/01/2018 00:37

I know the thought of the suburbs, and a suburban lifestyle would make many people come out in a cold sweat, but for me it’s the best kind of area and as remote as I’d go.

I’m also a Londoner, and whilst I’m fed up with a lot of things about London, I genuinely cannot fathom rural, semi-rural or coastal living - it’s just not for me.

DonnyAndVladSittingInATree · 15/01/2018 00:38

I think if you’ve friends who will come visit and enough going on that you know you will get out every now and then you’ll be ok. I very very rarely go out out. I just need to talk to people at least once a day or I might as well stay in pyjamas and eat Jaffa cakes because nothings getting done Grin I’m that fragile!

RarelyInfallible · 15/01/2018 00:38

Snakes and bushfires. (I’m in Oz too.) I know there’s a risk of that anywhere but more so in the country. Will you always work from home? Otherwise the school drop off (which will take you close to 4 hours per day if they stay at the same school) could be an issue.

DonnyAndVladSittingInATree · 15/01/2018 00:39

Oh yes, check the transport links for teens. I loved the countryside as a child but once secondary school started I hated being so far away and my parents didn’t want to be giving lifts every weekend.

MiniMum97 · 15/01/2018 01:00

Sounds amazing! Do it!

Original poster
CheapSausagesAndSpam · 15/01/2018 01:00

Cheshire as I said in my OP, the children would continue at their current school. We'd drive them there. DD1 is 14 so already a teen but she's not a gad about really...as I said, she could stay at friend's for a night on friday evening or they could come to us.

She and her mates are more likely to go surfing or something than to a bowling alley or cinema.

Rarely already have to deal with snakes and bushfire threats where we currently live...the children attend the same school and it's right through...so from kindergarten to high school.

I'm thinking that if I drive them to school...then do shopping, go home and work...they could do after school club and DH can collect them.

I will always work from home, yes.

Donny transport links...nope. Not there. It's drive or stay home.

But that's not at all unusual here and as a result, parents of teens and younger are very open to their children having guests for anight or two.

We had a friend of my 9 year old's stay for two days recently as her Mother had to go to harvest her honey (miles away) and there was a school trip the little girl didn't want to miss.

They live a long way from town too.

OP posts:
Original poster
CheapSausagesAndSpam · 15/01/2018 01:04

Re activities....neither of mine do them. We have found the opportunities for free activities (beach, pony rides) are far more appealing to both DC than dance classes etc.

We do have very good friends who would certainly host them if there was something special on in town like a concert or convention.

OP posts:
mrsplum2015 · 15/01/2018 01:06

It wouldn't work for us as our kids are very social and wouldn't be able to have the same involvement in social life and activities. You say your dd likes surfing but would she want to go with a group of friends near where they all live, which would involve you driving her backwards and forwards?
Also my kids wouldn't want to go to an after school club. At high school age that would just be waiting at the library for my dd if she didn't have after school sport that day and she would hate me for it!
But if youre sure it will work OK for you and your family then why not?

Bochdew · 15/01/2018 01:10

My DH would love to live somewhere really remote. I find the idea absolutely terrifying. I want the possibility of someone hearing me scream if a murderer decides to break in.

another20 · 15/01/2018 01:14

Can you rent somewhere isolated for a while before you commit to buying? Also very few properties come up or end up on the open market in isolated places. You need the inside track - embed yourself in the community and ask around. The more remote the better for me. How old can kids drive in aus and will you be able to supply a car for use?

derangedmermaid · 15/01/2018 01:17

So fucking remote there's not a postcode.

Christmascardqueen · 15/01/2018 01:21

i'm in Canada so a 50 minute drive is NOT remote at all. you have a road that's better than fly in fly out only or boat access.

SuperBeagle · 15/01/2018 01:23

I live in the Snowy Mountains, NSW Australia.

It's remote. I love it. I wouldn't live anywhere else if I had the choice. It is so beautiful, clean, untouched, and it is steeped in history (Banjo Patterson, Man From Snowy River etc). Plus, one of the only places in Australia that gets predictable and regular snow.

But we just got back from a holiday to the UK and, funnily enough, many parts of Scotland would be far too remote for me. The shit weather probably plays a factor there, but I couldn't live in a town which didn't have so much as a pub/general store/post office etc. And many of the towns in Western Scotland were exactly like that, with no large town nearby. Couldn't do it.

SuperBeagle · 15/01/2018 01:30

The only downsides about living where we are:

  • Have to own either a 4WD or be competent at putting chains on a car in the snow.
  • Dry summers. Like all parts of rural Australia, drought it always a looming threat. Living on tank water means you have to restrict how much water you use/how long your showers are etc. It also means that your land is prone to bindis and this is something that needs to be kept on top of.
  • March flies.
  • Wildlife. Not so much a negative as much as it is truly a part of your every day life. We had a small bat stuck in our open window (the bit that was crossed over) the other day, which meant we had to rescue it. That's just another day living in an area like this.
mailTo · 15/01/2018 01:38

That would be fine for me but I think it could be too remote for the children. Missing out on small friendship-things like hanging out with a mate for 30 minutes after school instead of everything being abig deal needing planning.